Chapter 56

The door closed shut behind me by its own. The only light that reached my eyes coming from some far away candles. I felt someone's breath on my neck, taking in my scent, yet no one was there. I heard a few muffled laughs and suddenly some more candles lit up allowing me to see the person in front of me. It took me by surprise to see her right in front of me, sitting on a chair, her head held up high as she watched me.

I gasped, surpressing a scream, and I took a step back, she rolled her eyes.

"You're acting like this is your first time with a witch, Aelin Huneke," she spoke.

The hairs on my arms stood up as a quivered made it past my spine.

"That's not my name anymore," I replied, trying my hardest to appear confident.

She rolled her eyes again, "the Alpha called me to help you out with your wolf," she changed subjects too bored with our previous interaction.

"Yes."

"How is it? Being Luna without having your wolf's full strength?" She questioned, but I could almost hear her laugh.

"I've suffered through worse, but if you don't mind, I'd like to get to the 'training' or however you want to call it," I try to speed things up.

Her eyebrows flicked up as her eyes rolled, "if that's what you want..."

She made it stupidly obvious how bored she was by me, how little I was allowing her to get even the slightest of fun from me. I wasn't concerned by however she felt, she had agreed to do this, if she's bored and her expectations of the type of entertainment that I would bring to the table were seriously overrated, that's too bad.

She walked me through how to mind link again, her explanation much more precise than any werewolf could ever give me. Consequence of her struggles as a half werewolf, half witch. Surprising to me yet not to her, I was able to mind link like I had in the past with a bit of practice, the path she had narrated for me to follow came so natural to me. Like it had been hiding for so long and suddenly, she had discovered it for me.

I was trying to hold my excitement when I was able to mindlink only Arsen, who happened to be miles away from this place. He replied with a sarcastic remark that tried to hide both his surprise and happiness. *This* was improvement.

However, this session soon turned to be torture as she introduced me to the next thing she wanted me to tackle. She pronounced the word carefully, making sure that every sound was clear. Her eyes closed down on me, trying to capture a glimpse of my inner thoughts.

"Shifting," she stated.

I gulped, I wasn't expecting to go into that so quickly, but I also didn't expect to be able to mind link like a normal werewolf in our first session. I straightened my back, and I met her gaze. She looked surprised when she realised I hadn't tried to swallow down the anxiety that I felt. I didn't care if she saw it- actually, I did. I wanted her to see how I felt about it, even if she would be able to guess it regardless, for her to be able to help me, she has to know.

"Are you scared?" She began pacing around me, studying me closely.

"Yes and no," I answered, "I know that I'll be fine, but there's a part of me that thinks that it's going to hurt and that I'm not fine, my wolf is not okay."

"That part of you is not wrong," the witch then said and my eyes shot at hers, as questions swarmed my brain. "Whatever witch shut your wolf was strong, especially if it was strong enough for you and the Alpha not to know you were mates. Mate bonds are strong, but with an Alpha even stronger. The type of strength that it took for that witch to shut your wolf did end up hurting you. Both your wolf and your human part, you were able to heal, your wolf not as much. So yes, shifting will hurt like a bitch. But your wolf has to realise she's hurt to heal, right now she's comfortable in the state she is, but it doesn't do any of you any good," she explains and then shrugs.

I don't know how to feel as she bombards me with information, "simplify," I mutter out. I want her to give me a simple, direct answer. Give me the first step, an attempt for me not to drown in everything she said and would continue to say if I didn't stop her.

"I want you shift," she orders with a shrug.

"But I can't," I make her understand.

"Try," she replies.

"It doesn't work like that. It's like I have a mental block," I enlighten her.

"Try to break it, and this time do it like you mean it," she nods and then she sits down, crosses one leg on top of the other, puts her hands over her thighs and waits.

I decide to listen to her and do exactly that, 'try to shift'. I close my eyes shut and I try my hardest to shift, but as I go through the process of shifting mentally as I picture my body turning to a wolf, I encounter that wall again, it's impossible for me to break it like she says. I open my eyes, accepting my failure.

"I can't. It won't work."

"You're not even trying," she accusses me, "you have to actually try to fight it, not just check. I know you can't, that's why you're here."

I roll my eyes, "your instructions are exactly what I've been trying to do all along. I need something new."

"Girl, I know much more than you'll ever know so get to shifting and this time actually shift like you need to, not like you're just passinng by like you just did," she replies angrily.

I decide not to push my luck anymore and I shut my mouth. I'm still doubting how this could ever work and I try it. I give her the benefit of the doubt and I follow her instructions with as much will as I can master. I close my eyes again and I start preparing myself to shift, I pictured everything, the way it should go, the way that I used to take to shift and at the end I saw my wolf form.

I rushed to it, I lunged myself to shift forgetting the existence of that wall. I ran to it, everything around me becomes sweet nothing as I come face to face with my wolf.