Chapter 34: How was i supposed to

Klaus’s pov

“If you’re going to look at me like that,then stop pretending it’s just rehearsal” she said, her voice partially trembling.

I wanted to speak but something held my tongue then I saw it.

A single tear drop boldly escaped her eyes

“Because I’m not your project,” she added. “And I’m sure as hell not your practice round.”

I didn't mean to hurt her.

Hell, I'd never want her to cry or feel hurt in any way but how was I supposed to say that?

How was I supposed to tell her none of that was practice?

How was I supposed to tell her that I'd been waiting since freshman year to be able to speak to her, touch her…be with her.

The more time I spent with Tessa, the more shallow that rabbit hole became. The more I couldn't keep my hands to myself whenever we were close.

I didn’t just want to look at her anymore, I wanted to hold her hands, pull her into a tight hug, and protect her.

I wanted her to see for herself that she is an amazing person, she’s talented and irreplaceable.

I wanted her to stand up to shallow fucks like veronica, i wanted her to see herself the way i saw her.

I wanted her to fall in love but not with me, herself.

And I just ended up ruining things between us.

I did too much just like I always did when I loved someone.

By the time I got home, the house smelled different. It smelled like someone was cooking and that was strange because no one has been in that kitchen for ages.

I walked closer to find Ethan in the kitchen.

One thing about my brother, he didn't cook or did anything selfless unless he wanted something or had something to say. It never turns out well.

I dropped my bag at the door and watched carefully as he set the table and gently arranged dinner for the both of us.

“Oh good you’re back” he said with a smile and sat “i was beginning to wonder what id do if you didn’t come and wasted all this food”

At first, I stood there wondering what twisted plan or sick idea he had now then eventually walked over and sat across from him.

We shared grace and ate in silence.

Halfway through the meal, he dropped his cutlery dramatically and sighed.

“Klaus” he started with that familiar tone that pricked my skin.

“I never really apologise for that day”

“What day?” I asked without looking up

“You know when i said you should leave tessa alone”

“Oh so you know her name now” i drank some water “i see the monkey is evolving”

“Hey” his tone was sharper and he pointed his fork at me “no insulting over my own meal, its fucking rude”

“okay …mom” i sighed “what exactly do you want ethan”

“Look things have been kind of tense” he calmed “with everything going on i just want us to act like family for once”

I almost laughed but I allowed him to talk.

“Are we cool?” he said with a smile but didn't get a response “i’m sorry klaus”

“We’re cool” I said and that was enough.

A few seconds passed.

“Mind telling me about what happened today?” he paused “in the hallway?”

“I'd rather not” I said, leaned back in my chair and really looked at him "there's always something with you isn't there?”

“What do you mean?”

“I mean get your butt out of my personal life for once ”

“I’m just concerned klaus”

“Oh I'm flattered” I placed a hand over my chest dramatically.

He exhaled and shook his head like i was the difficult one.

“I heard she cried”

My chest tightened.

“And?” I said with a stern look.

“And nothing real has even started yet and you're already hurting her”

I let out a dry, short laugh.

“You don't even know what happened”

“I don’t need to” he replied calmly “its you”

I sensed that tone he used to break me. The tone that sounded nice but hit worse than yelling.

“You get close to people and things just fall apart”

I clenched my jaw.

“You dont even try, you just walk in, fuck shit up and leave and it genuinely comes naturally”

“That’s rich coming from you”

“I’m not the one confusing her and making her lash out in the hallway” he shot back.

I snapped

“You say that like i planned to confuse her”

“That’s the thing with you brother, you don't need to plan anything” he shifted in his seat “all you have to do is be yourself and everything turns to shit”

I stood from my seat.

“I’ve had it with you ethan, i’m leaving”

“I get you can’t handle my honesty but at least finish the fucking food” he pointed his fork at me “it took a lot of effort to make”

“Honesty” I laughed dryly “honesty? You sit here, cook food, pretend to care like you're better than me”

“I am better than you… at this… at everything” he walked over to me “and i know when to stay away”

“Say exactly what you want to say” my tone was low and threatening.

He held my gaze and I didn't flinch.

“I like her”

Silence followed.

“I like tessa and unlike you I wouldn't dream of hurting her, not even a little bit”

I felt something twist in my stomach.

I suddenly felt… uncomfortable but not threatened.

”So you should back the fuck off” he growled.

I stared at him for a second. Was this another one of his schemes?

Was he doing this to get back at me for you know… existing

Why Tessa?

“Or what?” i shot back

“Or i will make her see exactly what kind of monster you are”

I scoffed.

“You act like some kind of saint” i snapped “like you don't have those tiny little demons controlling your every move” i shook my head “i’m not the monster, you are”

“You don't get to say that”

“You dont’ get to fucking tell me what to do” i shot back “i am done listening to your bullshit, i am done feeling guilty about what i did when i was a child because guess what?” i paused eyes wide “ i dont fucking care anymore, dad deserved his sentence and if i were to go back i’d fucking do it again”

“You did not just say that”

“I did and I'll say it a thousand times more” i grabbed my keys and headed for the door “oh and tessa is mine”

I didn’t wait for a response, I just stormed out of the house.

“You will regret this” I heard him scream before I hopped on my motorcycle and rode off.

I swear everything about my family is fucking shitty.