Chapter 14: Lost

Thorne’s POV

Ruelle finally agreed to come with me, but I know better than to assume that this was over. Her coming with me doesn’t do much for the turmoil in my mind, considering I still have to tell her about Nyra.

That alone is eating away at my conscience every second. Telling her about Nyra would mean telling her about the blood debt and all the other things in my life related to the darkest season of my life— the season my Father died. Things that I had promised to take to my grave. I knew eventually I would have to pour them out to her. The dilemma now, was whether she will still have me when she knows everything.

I am at her mercy until I tell her everything she needs to know.

Carlos was here as well. As my beta, he had to be here while I try to convince my Luna to come with me. Carlos knows about Nyra and I. Not the entire ordeal between us but he knows we have a connection. One that somehow puts her in a higher place than most people in my life, except my luna of course. But Carlos being Carlos, he never asked for the details.

Ruelle had to finish getting treated by the old wolf, so we decided to leave her coming with me till after a few days. In that time, I was able to explore the parts of the North I hadn’t seen yet and Garron was more than happy to show me around.

“I have to admit it was quite surprising that you went for the youngest of my daughters to be your Luna.” Garron had started during our quest.

“We can blame that on the mate bond”. I joked, then furrowed my brows. “Why is it surprising?”

“Ruelle is…”. He looks around, his face scrunched up as he searches for a befitting word. “Ruelle is and always has been… sheltered. She knows little about wars or the responsibilities of a luna. As you know, she spends most of her time in the woods. Hunting. She is my little girl and I care for her so much. Maybe you should give her sometime to adjust before saddling her with responsibilities. The pressure might be too much for her.”

The fact that Garron thinks Ruelle would feel any kind of pressure as my Luna makes me want to laugh. Instead, I settle with reassuring him. “As long as she is by my side, where she belongs. You have nothing to worry about.”

We share a look and something really distant but familiar passes through Garron’s eyes. Hesitation maybe? I have always been of the opinion that the ability to do a thing comes to those who are ready for it, when the time is right. So for starters, I don’t believe that Ruelle or anyone else for that matter has to be an excellent warrior or Protector for her to be my Luna. The mate bond didn’t come with that as a criteria. So as long as she is by my side, if she wants to spend the rest of her years farming and growing crops then so be it. My clan will survive as it always has.

“Of course”. Garron nods, a small smile on his face. “I heard the South is home to many rare flowers, I’m sure she will love it there.”

“She will love it there with or without the flowers, trust me. I will make sure of it”.

Garron sighs. “Speaking of the South, any news on Rhyder?”

Rhyder.

Rhyder, the Alpha that we suspect is hiring the rogues of the North to cause damage. He is an Alpha of the South, which makes his reason for terrorizing the North unclear for now, but it will be uncovered. Along with many other secrets that we could use to capture him.

I don’t suspect that Rhyder is the one behind my Father’s Death, that is why I haven’t caught him yet. However, he could be a solid lead, that is why he is still on my radar. I just need to gather as much evidence as I can so when I do pay him a visit, it won’t be a random one. I won’t leave there without his head.

“We don’t have enough evidence yet. We’re watching.” I told him simply. I didn’t want to burden Garron with my personal issues. Rhyder and whoever he works with is my personal responsibility and I will take care of him accordingly. In private.

“Oh with an old wolf like Rhyder you won’t have to wait too long. The man is as secretive as an amateur wolf on the hunt. He will spring out eventually.” He jokes, amused.

“Any idea who he might be working with?”

“Rhyder works with a ton of wolves. A man of his caliber doesn’t work alone. He has more than a few of the wolves in Council wrapped around his finger, so maybe you can start from there.” Her says and I nod, making it a mental note to tell Carlos to gear our investigation towards the Council. I wasn’t looking forward to it. The Council of the Coast were the group of wolves responsible for order on both the North and the South, and they were as clean as an old wolf’s used underpants.

“Be careful though,” Garron continues, “You might find out more than you want to and might become pressured to clean the organization.” He laughs.

“You don’t have to worry about that. I couldn’t care less if the Council burns and dies. I just need my answers.”

“That’s a good start. I believe I am allowed to make sure none of this affects my daughter. If Rhyder find out you’re unto him, his first target after you of course would be your Luna”

“I will kill his Luna before he touches mine.” I deadpanned, not a drop of uncertainty in my words. Garron sees this and immediately drops the topic.

We walk more for a while before deciding to head back to the Keep. On getting there, I headed straight to Ruelle’s room, ignoring the attempts at small talk made by her older sister who tailed behind me.

“It was so nice of you to bring Ruelle back and stay till she recovered. Proves what a kind-hearted man you are…”. I could hear the smile in her tiny voice, breathless from trying to match my strides to her sister’s room. I stopped immediately, so suddenly that she walked right into my solid back with an “Oof!”

I turned to look at her, my eyes studying her features. I wondered if she was unaware that I was her sister’s mate and so it was my responsibility to do those things for her, it was either she didn’t know, or she knew and didn’t care. With my usual passive tone, I replied with a small smile. “Of course. Although it is my responsibility to care for your sister since she is my Luna”

She tried to hide it, but her breath caught in her throat and it was obvious to me. Her eyes widened all the way up to her hairline. It was like I threw a bomb at her, which made me furrow my brows. She basically lived in the same house with Ruelle and didn’t know that she was my mate. I found that interesting.

Thessa, I think her name was, looked down as though she couldn’t hold my eyes any longer. “Did you not know?” I asked her,

“Oh of course I did”. She rambled, although it was pretty obvious she didn’t. “I just didn’t…”. She trailed off, looking away again with her fingers coming up to her lips.

“Didn’t what?” I asked in a low voice

“I didn’t expect that you would… pick her”. She admitted, her voice tiny, almost like that of a mosquito. The difference between the woman standing in front of me and the one I was going to see was so glaring to the point it almost blinded me. Ruelle was nothing like her sisters, but then again they each had their own distinctive personalities from my observation. Ruelle was the only remotely normal one.

She didn’t expect that I would ‘pick’ Ruelle?

I looked down at her with a frown, my mind trying to grasp the many various reasons why she would say something like that. Did she really think she was in anyway a better option than Ruelle? The thought alone made me want to laugh. Sure, she might have been. But not to me, or any other wolf like me out there. The Silvermane sisters were undeniably easy on the eyes, all striking images of their mother, Amarinthe. But looks barely mattered to me, although I was blessed to have mated with the most beautiful of them all in my eyes.

“There weren’t other options for me, Ms Thessa”. I simply told her, already getting bored of this conversation. I just really wanted to check on Ruelle and make sure she was alright. “Now, if you would excuse me, I have to go see my Luna.” I excused myself, finding my way to Ruelle’s room.

I wasn’t blind, neither was I stupid. I knew exactly what was going on here, why Ruelle’s sister was so shocked that I was her mate. Ruelle was always the quiet and invisible sister. Always out of the way, so much so that they barely considered her a competition or a threat in comparison.

But what Therry, or whatever her name was, failed to understand was that the mate bond didn’t happen according to your choice. It doesn’t link you with someone just because you like them. As a matter of fact, it was more likely to link you with the person you hated the most. And you have to fulfill it or else you will have no peace.

I reached the little moon’s room and knocked, pushing the door open at the sound of her smooth voice telling me to come in. She was seated in front of the dressing table, a pot with something resembling a wilting wildflower placed on the table in front of her. She had been staring at it intently when I came in, but peeled her eyes from it to stare up at me the moment I shut the door. She smiled at me, her eyes crinkling at their sides and making me close to combustion at her weakening beauty.

She was getting much better, her recovery evident in the rush of color back to her skin and the life in her eyes. Her beauty was so blinding it gave me a headache, but mostly, it made me want to do things to her that a man of my honor wouldn’t dare to say out loud. Not that anything honorable mattered where my wolf was concerned. He was going crazy with need and made it almost impossible for me to be in the same room with her without my mind wandering into the dark corners.

I stood by the door, not daring to step closer to her in the state I was in. My eyes raked over her, as though checking inventory. She was almost herself again and it made something similar to childlike excitement rush through me. She stared silently at me, as though she could read my thoughts. But I knew it was impossible. There was no way she could see my intentions and still want to be in the same room with me. A sane woman would run for the hills.

“How did that get here?” I cleared my throat and broke the silence, deciding not to torture myself with thoughts of her while I was yet to claim her.

“An old friend. Morra plucked her for me”. She motioned to the flower, a special light in her eyes that I hadn’t noticed before.

I carefully trodded over to the edge of her bed, taking a seat and watching her from her reflection in the mirror. Her back was to me since she was sat in front of it.

“I haven’t gone to the woods since you left.” She continued, the confession falling from her lips boldly. “So she got me this dying flower so I could revive it. Remember what it feels like.”

I watched her silently. I wasn’t a stranger to Ruelle’s abilities, I knew she was capable of reviving dying things. Garron had informed me. I also knew that she didn’t use her abilities in battles and mostly focused on reviving dying flowers and birds because her powers required her to take from something to give to another.

It was dangerously beautiful. The ability to give life to something but only under the condition that it was taken from something else. It made me wonder how she managed it all her life. The more she healed, the less whole she was because she refused to take life from other things. She was too good to take but so eager to give. It made me want to clutch her in my arms and hide her from the world.

In my presence, she turned to the wilting flower, focusing all her attention on it and breathing air through her nostrils. She shut her eyes for a moment, her shoulders rising and falling with deep breaths as she breathed into the dying flower. Like a magical miracle, I watched with a small smile as the dying flower slowly rose to its full height, the green and bright pink colors rushing into its leaves and the petals spreading like wings.

It was beautiful. Like nothing I had ever seen. She slowly peeled her eyes open, staring at me through the mirror.

“And what does it feel like?” I asked her.

She smiled, her eyes turning a deep shade of blue. “Me”