Was this what falling in love was like? Love was something he’d never expected. How did a person know if they were in love? It was all so confusing. He didn’t believe in love, did he?
Now, his cell phone rang and he dragged himself from his thoughts to answer it. He smiled when he saw it was Jeff.
“Hey,” he said, his voice thick.
“Hey, you! How’s the day going?”
Chad smiled. Better now that you called. “Boring. Sick of riding a desk. What are you doing calling in the middle of a school day?”
Jeff chuckled. “I’ve got a minute between classes. I got to thinking about your house.”
“What about it?”
“I know you’re frustrated with not being able to work on a lot of the repairs and improvements you want to do until your cast is removed.”
“Frustrated” didn’t even begin to describe how Chad felt. He hated not being able to work on his house. “And?”
“And, I was thinking, you’ve already got the floors done downstairs, and you wanted to get a nice rug.Why don’t we go to Casper’s tonight? If you see something you like, I can load it in the truck and bring it to your home.”
Chad loved the idea. “That’s great! Let me run by the house to get the paint chip that matches my living room walls.” They made plans to meet there, then got off the phone.
The rest of Chad’s day flew by as he grew more excited by the minute. It wasn’t really about the rug, although he was looking forward to that. It was more about going out with Jeff. It wasn’t a date, per se, but it was still the two of them going out in public. Together.
Shit. He was becoming a sap. You don’t believe in love, he reminded himself. The attraction had obviously already run its course for Jeff, despite his earlier declaration of falling in love at first sight. Chad should feel happy about that, but it gnawed at him. The pull he felt to Jeff was stronger than ever, yet Jeff hadn’t hinted he was interested at all anymore.
Jeff obviously hadn’t enjoyed their evening on the couch as much as he had. But that was okay. It meant he didn’t have to worry about hurting him. It was what he wanted, right? Relationships just weren’t in the cards for him. Clearly they were becoming good friends, though. He enjoyed Jeff’s company. Theynever ran out of things to talk about.
Chad sighed and pressed his lips together. If he was so okay with just being friends, why did he have to fight the urge to kiss Jeff every time they were together? Why did he miss him as soon as he left? Why did he crave the scent of him?
He shook his head and tried to rid himself of those thoughts. Right now he just wanted to finish his shift and get home. He turned back to the piles of forms on his desk and began wading through them until it was time to leave.
* * * *
By the time Jeff pulled into the drive, Chad was pacing the living room, frustration building with each step. He couldn’t get Jeff out of his head and he wasn’t sure he could go another night pretending he wanted to be only friends, when all he could think about was burying himself inside Jeff. Deep inside.
The bell rang and he yanked open the door.
Jeff’s eyes widened and he tilted his head to the side. “You okay?”
Chad nodded. “I’ve got the paint chip in my pocket. Let’s go.” He stepped outside and practically stomped to the truck.
“You want to tell me what’s wrong?” Jeff asked as he slid into the driver’s seat and waited for Chad to buckle up.
“Nothing.”
“Of course.” He shook his head. “Okay then, let’s go shopping for rugs.” Jeff put the truck in reverse and backed out of the drive.
The ride to Casper’s was quiet, other than some pop music on the radio. Chad glanced sideways at Jeff and gritted his teeth when he noticed his flushed skin. God, he was so fucking sexy. Maybe that was it…maybe Chad just needed to get laid. Back in the city he would have picked up a guy at a bar, taken care of things, and never seen him again.
He tried to imagine himself doing that in Apple Grove and knew it wasn’t possible. First of all, Apple Grove didn’t have a gay bar, and secondly, when Chad tried to picture himself with a man, the only man he wanted was Jeff. Damn. He was in deep.
They pulled up before a small brick storefront with a large picture window. Gold script lettering reading Casper’s Rugs arced across the glass.