Chapter 85 Pregnant
Lila POV
I cupped water in my hands and splashed it over my face again and again, as if cold water could wake me from this nightmare. I wanted no, needed this to be a hallucination. A stress dream. Just like the one where Nico had looked at me and said he loved me.
That dream had felt real too but what the hell was happening to me?
I brushed my teeth until my gums ached, trying to scrub away the sour taste of fear and bile clinging to the back of my throat. My stomach stayed twisted tight, anxiety curling deep in my gut. Even standing under steaming water, letting it beat against my skin, didn’t help. I couldn’t shake the dread.
No matter how I twisted it, no matter how hard I searched for some hidden upside, I couldn’t find a single silver lining. The mess between Nico and me was too violent, too complicated, too soaked in blood and power. There was no version of this where pregnancy fit.
“Miss Lila?”
My heart dropped straight into my stomach.
That fast?
I wrapped a towel around myself and opened the bathroom door, my fingers trembling. “Do you have the test?”
Doc stood there with a grave expression, like he already knew this could change everything. Like he already understood the magnitude of what we were about to confirm.
He nodded slowly. “I brought two.”
He held out a small paper bag.
I couldn’t move, my body locked up completely and legs stiff, arms useless. I stared at that bag like it was a loaded gun. Like it was a verdict waiting to be read. “Miss Lila,” he said gently. “You need to take them.”
My pulse roared in my ears. Every heartbeat felt too loud, too fast. Somehow, I forced myself forward and took the bag from his hand. It was absurd how something so small could hold so much power. How a few drops of urine could decide the course of my entire life.
I shut the bathroom door behind me and pulled out the boxes. This morning, I had woken up thinking my biggest problem was surviving Nico’s world.
Now I was about to find out if I was carrying his child. I inhaled deeply and I did it. Minutes later, I stood frozen, staring down at the sticks resting on the counter.
There were two lines, two thin, unmistakable pink lines. They blurred together as my eyes burned, the longer I stared the more suffocating they became. I had always liked that soft shade of pink gentle, feminine.
Today, I hated it because both tests confirmed it. There was no denying it, no escaping it. I was indeed pregnant with Nico Fattore’s child.
“Miss Lila?” Doc’s voice came through the door. “Are you finished?”
I dragged my gaze away from the tests their silent judgment and stared at the door instead.
He couldn’t know, if he knew, Nico would know. Not because Doc wanted to betray me, but because his loyalty wouldn’t allow him not to. And I wasn’t ready. I couldn’t face that truth yet and I didn’t even want to face it myself.
“Yeah,” I said, running a hand through my damp hair. “I’m done.”
My mind raced because I couldn’t lie. Doc would want proof. In this house, trust was a luxury no one had. I needed another option something that would buy me time.
I glanced at my reflection in the mirror and I barely recognized the woman staring back.
I had survived hell. I had watched a man die because I said he deserved it. I had felt power pulse through me as Nico carried out my judgment without hesitation and now Nico believed I had the hunger, the spine, to stand beside him in this world.
Maybe he was right, it was time to stop shrinking. I straightened, squaring my shoulders. I wasn’t a victim anymore.
I walked out of the bathroom and placed the two tests into Doc’s hands. “wow,” he breathed. “You’re pregnant.”
I nodded, I watched his face carefully, seeing the same uncertainty reflected there the same unspoken question of how this would change everything. “We have to tell Nico,” he said, already turning toward the door. “No.” I stepped into his path.
He stopped, eyes narrowing. “He has a right to know.”
“And he will,” I said calmly. “When I decide the time is right.”
“And when is that?” he asked sharply.
“When I say so.”
He tilted his head. “My loyalty is to Nico and not to you, I can’t keep something like this from him.”
I took another step closer, forcing my posture to remain steady. Nico had taught me this much fear was weakness, and weakness invited destruction.
“I need this to stay between us. For now.”
“Miss Li...”
“If you tell anyone,” I cut in coldly, “I will tell Nico what happened earlier.”
His face drained of color. “What are you implying?”
“You touched me,” I said smoothly, tilting my head. “When I was sick and vulnerable.”
His eyes went wide. “That’s a lie.”
I smiled a slow, dangerous smile. “Is it?”
“Yes,” he snapped. “That’s a blatant lie.”
“And who do you think Nico will believe?” I asked softly. “You or the woman he killed his own mother for?”
The words settled heavy between us and I felt it then that rush. The same intoxicating sense of control. Power wrapped around me like armor, solid and undeniable. With nothing but a threat and the right tone, I had him.
Doc stared at me for a long time. When he finally spoke, his voice was tight “Well played, Miss Lila. I’ll keep your secret but don’t fool yourself you can’t hide this forever.”
“I’m not trying to,” I said quietly. “I just need time.”
He moved past me toward the door. “We’ll need blood work. And a sonogram.”
I turned. “Can you arrange that discreetly?”
He exhaled slowly, eyes lifting to the ceiling. I was asking him to risk everything but this was one of those moments where survival demanded selfishness.
“I’ll see what I can do,” he said at last. “But don’t underestimate Nico. He sees more than people think.”
Then he was gone.
Doc was right.
Nico noticed everything.
I pressed my palm against my stomach, my chest tightening. This secret wouldn’t stay hidden for long. I needed a plan and fast.
If only I knew how Nico truly felt about me.
If only there wasn’t so much uncertainty between us.
Maybe then I wouldn’t feel so terrified. Maybe this could’ve been something I shared with him instead of hiding in the shadows.
A strange, faint flutter stirred low in my belly.
And despite everything… I found myself hoping just a little that maybe this wouldn’t destroy us after all.