Chapter 39 Thirty Nine
DANIKA
I watch with wide eyes as blood drains from his face. He looks like he's just connecting the dots. Wait…does that mean...he didn't know before now?
Hera had lied to me?
No...
No way.
She planned this, didn't she?
Kaziel didn't know about my father. She wanted me to confront him about it and get him to know that....
Oh my god, I've just walked into a trap.
"Kaziel, I'm sorry. I'm really sorry," I croak, disgusted with myself for treating him the way I had.
Does he hate me now that he knows? Have I ruined everything that was blooming between us?
Kaziel sighs, rubbing his forehead.
"Who told you about your father?" He asks.
I frown, puzzled. That's what he's curious about.
"I need to know, dove."
My heart slams hard against my ribs. He's still calling me 'dove.'
Do I deserve that?
"Her name is Hera. She has short red hair and a skull tattoo with a snake poking out of its eye," I tell him, and his eyes darken.
"Did you just say Hera? That brat?"
I frown. "You know her?"
"Come on, let's get you out of here first, okay?" He says, and I nod, letting him lead me out of the back of the building. I stare at him the entire time, nervous. I can't tell what's going on in his head, and it's stressing me out. But what do I do? I brought this upon myself.
Once we're seated in his car, he pulls out of the parking lot.
"You can yell at me, Kaziel. I deserve it. I should have known better than to listen to a stranger," I say, and he suddenly stops the car. My heart skips a beat.
And for a moment I think he's actually going to snap. But then he unbuckles his seatbelt, leans towards me, his lips crashing with mine.
The kiss is anything but tender. It borders on violent, but it is intoxicating, leaving me shaking. He's angry. He's so angry. But at the same time, he's hurting so bad. I can feel it through every brush of his lips against mine and every graze of his teeth on my flesh.
By the time he pulls away, tears are streaming down my cheeks, the sounds of our heavy breathing punctuating the silence.
"If you think for a second that the fact that you are the daughter of a monster would make me stay away from you. Then, you are simply being delusional. It also means you do not know me well enough," he says, his voice thick with emotion.
A lump forms in my throat, my hands shaking from the intense relief that floods me.
He doesn't hate me.
"And as for you trusting the words of a stranger, it's all my fault." His voice is shredded, cracking with an unbearable amount of pain that lodged itself deep in my chest.
"No, it wasn't—"
He cuts me off.
"I'll try harder to...win your trust. I know I can be overwhelming, and I probably scare you, but I—"
Oh no, he thinks it's his fault. He really thinks he's too much for me.
He should be pouring out his anger, not channeling it to himself.
"Kaziel, please stop," I croak, tears blurring my vision.
His Adam's apple bobs in his throat, his hands tightening on the wheel.
I reach for him, cupping his cheek. "You did nothing wrong. You...you have been so kind...so perfect, always holding back even if it kills you too. Please don't blame yourself. I'd rather you...punish me instead."
His eyes go wide. "No, I won't do that. I don't—"
I sniffle, wiping at my tears. "Yes, you will."
He goes pale instantly. I'm scared too, but I'm more terrified by the fact that he thinks he's the problem. If I don't teach him to recognize that I make mistakes too, he's always going to be hard on himself.
Always.
And I can't have that.
"Asking me to punish you is dangerous, don't you know that?" He breathes.
I smile nervously.
"Well, my mate is a dangerous man, and for some reason, I can't help but be drawn to danger," I say softly.
His gaze darkens. "Not while you're on your period, though. Some other time," he says.
My smile widens. He thinks I'm going to forget. But what he doesn't know is that I look forward to being punished.
And as I watch him continue to drive, I can't help but squirm in my seat with excitement.
Oh dear, I guess I'm no saint after all.
....
The moment the car rolls to a stop, I'm still too tangled in my thoughts to move. The rest of the drive back had been silent, heavy with everything we didn't say.
I keep sneaking glances at him, hoping he'll look my way, but his focus stays pinned in front of him with his knuckles pale around the steering wheel.
When we finally step inside the house, the air feels cooler than I remember. The faint scent of dark chocolate clings to the air. I'm still kicking off my shoes when Kaziel suddenly turns around.
Before I can even say anything, he wraps his arms around me.
It's not one of those careful embraces. It's desperate and full-bodied, like he's afraid I might disappear if he lets go.
His breath trembles against my hair. My first instinct is to freeze. My brain can't catch up to the fact that he's hugging me. But by the next second, I'm melting into him completely.
His chest is solid and warm beneath my palms. My fingers curl into his shirt, and I let myself sink there, into the space between us where the world doesn't exist.
"I missed you," he murmurs, his voice hoarse and low against my ear.
My throat burns. "I'm right here," I whisper, even though I know that's not what he means. He missed me before this, before I shut him out, before I let someone else's poison get in the way.
Kaziel draws back just enough to look at me. There's a plea buried in his eyes that is raw and unguarded.
"Don't do that again," he says softly. "Don't give me the silent treatment. If I do something wrong, anything at all, just tell me. Don't walk away from me like that again, dove. I can't take it."
My heart stumbles in my chest.
I nod, swallowing past the lump in my throat. "Okay," I whisper. "But you have to promise the same thing. No more shutting down. No more pretending you're fine when you're not."
His lips twitch, something almost like a smile ghosting there. "You drive a hard bargain."
"You love it," I murmur.
His smile softens, and he presses his forehead against mine. "Yeah," he breathes, "I do."
And in that moment, standing in the middle of the sitting room with his heartbeat pounding next to mine, it feels like I'm home.
"As much as I'd like to hold you forever, I really think you should be studying," he tells me, and I freeze.
"What do you mean?"
"Well, I overheard your physiology professor talking about an impromptu test," he shrugs, and my eyes bulge in their sockets.
"When? Please don't say it happens tomorrow. Please."
He winces. "Unfortunately. It will happen tomorrow."
I groan, collapsing on his chest. "Can't you make him disappear off the face of the earth tomorrow?"
He's silent for a moment.
"I can definitely work around that," he suddenly drawls, and I look up, alarmed.
"No, no, no, I was joking. I'll go study right away," I say, hurrying up the stairs. His mischievous laughter follows me, and my cheeks heat up.
"Feel free to grab anything from the fridge," he hollers, and I grin.
I wanna marry him.
….
Hours after I’m deeply focused on studying, the door creaks open and Kaziel walks into his study, shirtless. My mouth instantly goes dry at the sight of his body. But then I remember the scars I’d seen on his skin.
He hands me a bottle of water and sits on his chair, watching me.
“You should take a break. It’s been four hours,” he says, and I flash him a sweet smile to tease him.
“Why? Are you bored?”
His eyes darken, and he leans forward on his desk.
“Of course, I am bored,” he drawls.
I lean towards him, beaming.
“We can’t do anything. I’m on my period, remember?”
His gaze darts to my lips. “I was only trying to be considerate. But you clearly don’t need it.”
“What will you do then?”
He parts his lips to speak but suddenly freezes, bringing his glowing bracelet to his line of vision.
“What is it?” I ask as his wide-eyed gaze collides with mine.