Chapter 43

"Josh, I love you!"

"I love you more, and you'll see everything will change Now."

"Are you kidding? They will hunt us down wherever we go, people will literally fuck with my life! You know it!"

"Who knows? Besides us?"

"Petros. He felt it... In the party room, when he touched my arm..."

"The heat! That's how Jade knew!"

"Yes it was, and he won't rest. By now he must be hunting us, my father must know I'm expecting a son from you!"

"I have no choice then Olivia..."

"What do you mean Josh?"

"This is war! I will not allow anyone to hurt my family!"

The moment Josh said that I knew it was true, that those words came out of his soul.

I loved him, I adored him! And I feared what would happen, Josh and I couldn't afford to waste any more time.

As he himself said. This was all about us, about our family

So it was war!

We hid in the reserve, and I was well taken care of. Everyone received the news of my son and Josh with joy! There wasn't a villager, noble and native, who didn't congratulate us. It was beautiful the way they lived, I understood then why Vivian loved it there. But why had she returned to my father? Did she expect his approval and deep love?

I had no such hope!

I sat in the reservation cafeteria where everyone ate together, and some of the children braided me, and put flowers in my hair without even caring if I was Aaryn.

Josh sat down beside me, grabbed my hands as if I was going to run away. Walking down the aisles a tall guy, long hair, very handsome and well adjusted face. When Josh saw him he widened his eyes, stood up and ran to hug him.

"Olivia... Come meet him!"

I stood up, Josh looked like he got a

Christmas present.

"Olivia this is my Uncle Adam, Adam this is the woman of my life Olivia!"

He glared at me too, smiled a little at the corner of his mouth and shot Josh a look - We have a thing for pretty Aaryns then!

He turned to me

Olivia, you have your mother's eyes - I felt that when he said that he became sadder. As if the brightness in his gaze faded a little, but soon changed Subject.

"Josh, you asked me to come.... I'm here! And I don't intend to be long.... What's this about. "

"Olivia...is..."

Josh didn't have to finish, Adam put his hand to his mouth and said

"Oh no, she's pregnant? Josh I don't know whether to celebrate or cry! You know what happened..."

I felt the speech in codes, so I decided to wake up and make the narrative include me.

"Adam I know what happened to MY mother, I know why she died. So I asked Josh to call you"

"And why?"

"Because I need to know.... How it happened, why she went back there?

How many months pregnant ... I need to close this gap in my life."

"I don't think it's good for a pregnant woman to know that kind of thing."

He said swallowing his saliva in a dry way.

"I am strong. I bet I can handle it!"

Adam looked at Josh, who nodded.

Adam took a deep breath, he didn't seem ready to say anything about Vivian. But he was under pressure, and not talking about her to his mother would be an insult to his memory.

"I'm going to take a shower and a beer and I'll see you guys later and tell you whatever you want to know. Okay?"

I agreed

"Josh, take care of her. Don't stay anywhere near the gates or in the garden. Alert at all times!"

He said before disappearing down the hall, the way he spoke made me shiver, it was a sincere warning he wasn't kidding.

Josh hugged me at the same moment and I allowed myself to be weak and vulnerable in his strong arms. I felt like I had a family.

It bothered me that my mother was not as lucky as I was, she would not have the opportunity to see her son or daughter grow up. She would not have the opportunity to live with Adam, who apparently still suffers for her.

And just thinking that everything had been denied by our father, our own blood disgusted me even more.

"What are you thinking Olivia?"

Josh said putting a strand of my hair back.

"I'm thinking we're going to war, I'm fucking scared and I'm sad for My mom. And then I think, Oh my God, I'm having a baby! And I don't even know how to take care of myself right."

"Wow, all this?"

"Yes! I wanted to get some air..."

"No way, the garden and everything else is forbidden! If you want we can walk around the palace for a while... But no fucking way! Didn't you hear what Adam said?"

Josh was right and I knew it, but I wanted a way out of it all. To be myself, to be with him without the impending sense of death. Which we never had!

"What if we spend the afternoon together? Lying down, we can talk a little.... At night I'll be"

"Planning an attack on the castle, I get it! And you already knew that Josh! I really did!"

"Don't be upset, I'm just trying to do my best.... And that means taking care of you guys."

"I don't want to upset you..."

"It'll pass, I promise! Okay? Soon we'll end something big, it's been going on for millennia already.... Think that the symbol of it all is the little one you have inside you now."

That was a weight I didn't want my son to carry, a burden I didn't want to give him at all. The weight of being the symbol person of a movement without even being born.

But I didn't say anything to Josh, he was excited. I would like to see his face if he found out that his great warrior could actually be a great warrior. But I didn't say anything, I let him enjoy the moment.

The excitement that everyone had with me made me gasp every now and then, and I tried to recover. I never received this attention, I was not the saint Vivian, and I never would be! But people looked at me with a brilliant gaze, full of love and devotion, as if I was able to end millennia of a prejudiced and separatist system just by spreading my legs for Josh.

My son or daughter was not a warrior, he was just a baby. A fragile baby! And the thought of putting all that pressure on him or her made me want to run away.

I didn't know the full story, but something told me that my mother's sense of duty drove her into the clutches of fucking death.

The story had been told, the story had been lived, and the person who was the key was not there to mourn with those who mourned her loss.

But my name is Olivia, not Vivian, never forget that!

Josh looked at me in a way that made my whole body shake. It was love and desire and devotion. And I never dreamed of being looked at in such a beautiful way, not even in my best dreams.

I would leave myself with him and analyze his expressions, look at his face while and sleep. I analyzed his whole body, as if I unconsciously knew something was about to happen. I was not used to intense happiness.

He slept so nonchalantly, and I lay with my chin on his chest to look at him. That day he had his eyes closed, but I knew he was awake because he was running his hands down my bare back.

"What is it my love?" he asked opening his eyes at some point

"Nothing, I just really like looking at you." I said offering him a smile.

"If you had woken me up earlier we could be doing nothing together. I love looking at you too ... But why do I know it's not just that?"

"I don't know what you're talking about Josh."

I said turning to the other side, avoiding his eyes.

Josh soon leaned against me, and I could feel his breath against my neck