I thought of him while I took a shower, and I still felt his passage through my body. And when I thought about it too much I felt delicious shivers running up my back.
I thought about him too while I got dressed. I put on one of the less flashy clothes I bought that day, looked at myself for a long time in the mirror, and didn't recognize myself. And that was really good, I couldn't see the ugly duckling in that reflection, I just saw a woman, who was really pretty. I always got ready beforehand, and I was always early for my appointments that made me anxious. And Vicenzo was the compromise that took my sleep and peace of mind! I thought of him again as he perfumed me and fixed my hair. I literally thought of him.
My cell phone rang on the mattress and I answered it first, it was Letícia and I knew. I held back the anxiety to tell him that I was living a story worthy of the novels I was passionate about. I refrained from telling her that I didn't even know what sex was before Vicenzo, and that maybe I would never be happy without him in my life.
- Hi, you disappeared what happened? - She said not even saying hi to me.
- it's too busy... That's it!
- I went to the apartment, and I thought they had kidnapped you... Your mailbox is full! - When she said that I felt like laughing. But I didn't, I kept answering the questions in a blasé and far from sincere way.
- Oh no big deal, I'm covering a story for the magazine. And I needed to travel, sorry I didn't say anything.
- All right, it's no big deal. Her voice is different, she's even sounding happy... what happened? - She was a bitch, but she knew me like nobody else!
- I'm satisfied with the work, that's all!
- Didn't get any man? Hey where are you? speaking of which where are you?
I broke the conversation and hung up on Letícia's call in less than three minutes, I didn't want to say where I was, I didn't want to answer anything that could put an end to that frenzy I was experiencing. As soon as I turned off the cell phone and put it on the bed, Vicenzo entered through the bedroom door.
- Hi, who were you talking to? - He was direct, and in that respect he was a lot like the crazy woman I was talking to a few seconds before his dramatic entrance.
- It was Leticia... - I replied knowing there was no need for lies. - But don't worry, it was no big deal. - I added trying to reassure him.
- okay, it was really just a question. - He closed his eyes, and I had noticed that he did that whenever he wanted to say more than he let out.
- What happened Vicenzo? - I asked maybe being invasive.
- Nothing is just... Never mind, are you ready? Let's leave in a bit!
- Don't do that, tell me what you thought!
- Nevermind Lauren, didn't I already tell you? - There was the out of control, the angry and lost look. But if I analyzed the situation a bit I would know exactly what the problem was, it was just a matter of really noticing the signs.
- Vicenzo... Was talking to Letícia a problem?
He ran his hands through his hair again, his gaze too dark, his eyes not even looking blue anymore.
- It wasn't a problem for you to talk to your friend... my problem is not knowing what you said.
- Do you want to know what I said? To have some kind of control, that's the question? - I said staring at him, a little more than was safe at that moment. - Your fear is that I have been asking for help and a police team is on its way to the hotel? - I provoked
- No! - He replied shouting, too dry.
- So tell me Vicenzo what's the problem? - I forced an answer, it might not be the answer I wanted to hear, but at least it would be the purest truth at the end of the day!
- The problem is not knowing if you want to leave.
When he said that I bet I looked like an idiot I knew it had been hard for him to admit what was actually a weakness. But it melted me. Like everything he did!
- Vicenzo - I started approaching him, I held his arm in a delicate way, making him turn to me with those dark and confused eyes, sadder than usual. His irises were expanded, and I could tell he was breathing too fast at that moment. - I want you to know.... That I don't want to go anywhere. - I completed, I wanted him to feel how sincere I was being. Maybe this is one of the first times in my life where I literally threw the fuck and stepped on every egg along the way. No fear of breaking any on my commute!
He looked at me, and I felt as if I had been noticed by some important star in the solar system, and without realizing it I felt my heart pounding in my chest again. That effect I knew, I had felt it before. There was nothing lustful about the way he pulled me with those huge hands closer to him. He leaned his head against me, and we stayed like that, nose to nose for a while. And I used all my strength not to kiss him as I wanted to. And as he opened and closed his eyes, he seemed to be straining too.
There are things in our moments that make even the unfinished perfect and well-adjusted. As if they were previously planned by a force majeure to happen in this tune. I was never religious, I was never the type to blame the sign for the bad temper or the astral hell for bad choices along the way. But when I looked into those blue eyes, something made me believe there was something bigger.
- Just don't plan to leave Lauren, because I won't let you.
He said those words against my face and pulled away abruptly. The same, gloomy, arrogant and with many internal problems to solve.
Who can resist this?
- Come on, we have to go... Or we'll miss the schedule.
- All right, let's go then. - I agreed taking my bags, before taking a scolding from Vicenzo to let some employee take care of it.
In the car we were alone, but I noticed the number of cars around us, I noticed the security that was placed around Vicenzo. It didn't seem to be normal for someone who sells a joint and provides television in the favela. It was something important, something deeper and more dangerous.
He was silent the whole way, and so was I.
When we arrived at the runway, the jet was already waiting for us. I walked in and felt a reality I could never reach alone, not in the real world. The leather seats of a very light caramel gave an air of purity and cleanliness. It was too beautiful to be true.
- Lauren settles down there, I'll sort out some details and I'll come sit with you. - He promised and left, I tried to be less out of place.
The stewardess was too beautiful, the smile was like the sun, extremely blonde and white, the thin body of someone who exercises daily. She contrasted with my appearance, short, big butt, average chest, small waist and waist-length brown hair. That stewardess was the picture of perfection, like a skinny model from Vicenzo ia Secrets, nothing to do with my curves.
- Hello everything is fine? - She said turning to me - My name is Karen.
- Hello Karen, nice to meet you!
- Do you want something to drink? We have red and white wines, water, juices, whiskey, vodka, soft drinks and Gin...
- I accept a glass of white wine! If you don't mind.
She smiled and left, she was a kind stewardess, I couldn't complain.
And that's when I saw, as soon as he got on the damn jet, the look on her face, I couldn't blame her, he was in fact perfect and hot as fuck! But when she leaned against him, and he smiled, then I did get nervous. But I tried not to show it, when he released her he walked over to me and sat down on the bench next to me. He didn't even touch her, he just smiled, but seeing the image of his body leaning against hers, the smile released caused me disgust.
- What's up Lauren? - He asked looking at the Rolex on his wrist, while Karen approached handing me the glass of wine. white.
It was my goddamn face, too transparent expressions! I had no way!
- Thank you - I replied dryly taking the cup from her hands.
- Karen for me a double whiskey ok?
- Yes of course, I'll bring it right away! - The smile again, a smile of someone who had tasted it and wanted more!
How nauseous I felt! But I kept quiet. Even because, he could have whatever he wanted and to think otherwise was very naive of me.
- What there was? Why are you with that face? - He insisted.
- For nothing, I was just indisposed. Shall we make a stop? - I went to dry off, but the last sentence was ironic even by my standards.
- No, why would we stop? - He asked confused.
- So you could stop at some motel with... "Karen" - I spoke the name in a whisper - and stay with her, maybe that's better than making my life hell with cameras and kidnappings.
- I wouldn't need to stop, we have auxiliary beds at the bottom of the jet. - He replied ignoring what I had said! His smirk at me pissed me off even more. - Ah, so this is your problem? - He asked and I didn't answer, Karen walked towards him to deliver the whiskey. She smiled gently at him and just ran her finger along Vicenzo's arm. It filled me with such rage that I felt the pit of my stomach hurt. - Lauren? - He called while I remained ignoring him, looking out the window of the plane ready for takeoff.
He let out a low chuckle, and grabbed one of my legs.
- Lauren... - He said with humor, trying to get my attention.
- What are you laughing at? - I turned nervously looking at him.
- You turn a red delight like that with jealousy.
I rolled my eyes and turned back to the window, mostly because I made a fool of myself.