Chapter 39: I thought you didn't like me

Irin was surprised when Koth drew her into a kiss. Why would he kiss her? Then the 'why' didn't matter. All that mattered was the sensation of his lips against hers. His tusks were spaced just far enough apart to let her kiss him without them getting in the way. His grip on her neck felt possessive, and it sparked something inside her. She grabbed hold of his robe with both her hands and pulled him closer. Her world shrank down until it just consisted of the two of them. Eventually, they needed to stop to get air and to face their feelings. Koth ran his thumb over her cheek.

"Are you okay?" he asked. He still stood close to her, crowding her personal space, and she still had a grip on his robe, making sure he didn't step away.

"I'm better than okay. That was one hell of a kiss," she said. He smirked at her.

"World changing," he agreed. Something wet landed on Irin's face, and she looked up. When had the sky turned grey? she wondered as the raindrops fell. "Time to go back," Koth said and picked her up. She yelped as she was lifted into his arms, and she wrapped her arms around his neck out of instinct.

"I can walk," she told him.

"I know you can. You walked down to the lake. This is faster," he said. Irin didn't object. He was right, and the walk to the lake had taken more energy from her than she cared to admit. Besides, it was nice being so close to Koth. She leaned her head on his shoulder as he effortlessly carried them back to the shelter. He placed her on the soft bedding he had made for her and went to make sure the fire was still going. Irin watched him as he worked. He came back and took up the spot next to her as he always did. Unlike the other times, this time he reached out and pulled her onto his lap. Irin smiled as she found a comfortable spot. Her back was against his chest, and he had wrapped his strong arms around her. They both looked out over the landscape as the rain got heavier. The horses had wandered off to a nearby cluster of trees.

"I didn't think you liked me," Irin told Koth. He had taken his cloak and put it over her legs.

"Why would you think that?" he asked, and she could hear the frown in his voice.

"You made it pretty clear when we started the mission. You've flirted with almost all other women except me, and every time I touch you, you flinch. It doesn't exactly scream 'I like you'," she told him. She heard and felt his sigh.

"I can see how you could misunderstand my feelings," he admitted. "But I did flirt with you; you just ignored it," he added.

"You did not! When?" she asked and turned around to look at him.

"When we first met. I put on my absolute best flirting, and all you could do was talk about the high priest," he said. Irin thought back to when they had met. It felt like a lifetime ago.

"Oh. Yeah, you did flirt," she agreed. "So why did you stop?"

"Because I like you. I genuinely like you," he confessed.

"What? That makes no sense at all. Are you telling me you only flirt with women you don't like?"

"Well, no. Or yes. This is not easy to talk about. Turn around and look at the lake," he told her.

"Why would I look at the lake?"

"It makes it easier." Irin did as he asked and leaned back against him again. Koth sighed. "I only flirt with women I'm not interested in more than maybe to pass the time for a day, or a night. When I was younger, and my family and I did side hustles, that was just part of my character. It was easy to put on the mask as a carefree womaniser. Insults about my background and how I grew up could just roll off me. It's not who I want you to see," he told her. Irin felt moved by how open he was with her. She understood how hard it was to show someone the parts of you you weren't proud of. She took his hand and encased it in both of hers.

"That is not who I see when I look at you," she told him.

"I know. You never have. That is part of what makes you so amazing. It's like you see me, not any of the versions I show to others."

"I do see you, and I see the versions you hide behind. They are nice, charming, scary and impressive, but I still like you the best." She felt Koth tighten his embrace.

"I like how unapologetically true you are to yourself, little one. You know who you are, and you show it to everyone. I envied that when we first met," he told her.

"I don't do well with lies or acting; it's just easier to be who I am," she explained. He chuckled.

"See, you even make it sound easy," he said. He put a finger under her chin and made her turn her head. He kissed her again. This kiss was different, sweeter and more innocent. "You look tired; you should take a nap," he told her as they ended the kiss.

"I don't feel like it," she objected.

"It will do you good. You can stay on my lap if you like," he offered. Irin agreed and turned so she sat across his lap instead. She rested her head on his chest, and he wrapped the warm cloak around her. There was something soothing about the scent of Koth, the crackling of the fire and the pattering of the rain. Irin felt herself drift off to sleep.

When she woke up again, it felt like she had been asleep for days. It made her worry, as it wasn't that long ago she had actually been asleep for days.

"Koth?" she asked.

"Yes?" He was still sitting in the same spot with her on his lap.

"How long have I been asleep?" she asked.

"Not more than a couple of hours. Do you feel unwell?"

"No. The opposite, actually. I feel really rested," she told him.

"I'm happy to hear it. Then maybe you can help me with dinner? We still have meat left from the geese I caught yesterday."

"I would like that," she agreed. It would be nice to do something ordinary again. She had always liked the times when the two of them cooked together. She got ready to get up, but Koth didn't let go of her. She looked questioningly at him.

"You have to pay taxes to get up," he said. Irin smiled.

"Oh yeah?" she asked.

"It's true," he insisted.

"Then I guess I don't have a choice," she said and kissed him. He looked content when they drew apart. He helped her stand, and they started preparing their meal. It almost felt like it had done back in the house. No, Irin thought. This was better. Now she knew Koth liked her. It was so much better.