Chapter 47: misinterpretation

The following morning, I dashed downstairs in search of Tianna, my excitement palpable. I had missed her immensely and had thought about her all night, eager to see how the day would unfold. As she sat eating her pancakes, I greeted her, "Hi, how's my favorite and only sister-in-law doing?"

"Better than ever. So, are you coming with me today?" she replied.

"Yes, what did your nurse plan?"

"I really can't tell. Is she here already? I hope not. I hope she cancels for today."

"Don't be negative. Come on, let's go find her."

"No, I'm going to finish my breakfast. You should eat something too," she insisted.

"Yeah, okay." We hurriedly finished our breakfast and made our way to the garden, strolling together. Suddenly, Tianna turned to me and asked, "Does the model agency know that I've lost my mind?"

"Yes, actually, they do," I replied gently.

"Oh my god. So I'll never have a job again, then?"

"No, I wouldn't say that. You're as beautiful as always. Your memory loss hasn't affected your fashion sense, so that's a relief."

"Oh really? That's good to hear," she said. Then, with a sigh, she added, "I really want to go to work again, but I'm not sure if I can."

"I suggest you rest a little.” “I know 'a little' is already a long time," Tianna said, interrupting my train of thought. "Yes, she interfered. It's because I've been sitting at home for I don't know how many months now, and I'm not sure if I can do this. I feel so bored and lost, like I'm losing my mind, and my nurse doesn't want me to work. Everyone is fighting me. But I'm not handicapped. I'm not dead. I need a life. So what, do they not want me? Why does everyone keep me at home?"

"We could try to bring you over there," I suggested.

"Yes, then you'll have to fight this out with my nurse, of course, because she knows better. Yeah, I said it." Tianna's frustration was evident as she voiced her desire for autonomy and independence.

"Take it easy, Tianna. You'll be fine," I reassured her, trying to offer some comfort.

"See? There you go again with the pity. Everyone treats me like a sick person. I'm not sick. I'm trying to recover, but the pressure is way too much. I can't do this anymore. I can't," she said, frustration evident in her voice.

I was at a loss for words. I could feel her pain, her struggle for independence, but I didn't know how to alleviate it. This situation was overwhelming for both of us.

"You know, as I already mentioned, I'm not specialized in this section of the universe. This is not my category, but let's try something new. What do you still remember? What is your favorite color?"

"I think blue. I don't know."

"That's right. You always loved blue. See? You still remember something. It's not that bad. And your favorite food?"

"I don't really think I have one."

"Well, okay. Not bad. Do you remember any ex or boyfriend?"

"I can't see his face, but I don't know his name anymore."

I quickly searched for her ex-boyfriend on Facebook. "Do you see him in your mind?"

"Yes, that's him."

"See? You still know something. I love that. What's your favorite music?"

"I don't know. I don't know."

"That's okay. What is your name?"

"Tianna," she replied.

"Good. We're getting somewhere. See? I don't know why you're being so hard on yourself. You do remember certain things. So, I think there is some progress. Just be patient with it. Okay?"

She smiled. "Yes, sure."

"See, yesterday you told me you still remember us." I leaned forward to kiss her. She pushed me away.

"Ah! What are you doing? I'm not a lesbian!" she yelled.

"Oh my god. I feel so embarrassed. I'm so sorry. You told me you remembered everything we had yesterday, so... I thought you'd remember this. I'm so, so sorry," I stammered.

"What? You were cheating on him with me? But we can't do that to my brother. Shouldn't we tell him about this? So you mean to tell me I'm a lesbian?" she asked, confused.

"No, you're not. Sorry. This is really not the right thing to do. I'm so sorry about it. Oh my god, I feel so ashamed right now. Sorry, Tianna."

"It's okay, but never do that again, okay?"

"Yes, again, I'm sorry. I misread the signals," I said, feeling a deep sense of regret.

I felt extremely awkward when the nurse arrived. "Hey, what did I tell you about not having conversations with her without me?" she scolded.

"Yes, I'm sorry. She's here now. Just take over. I'll be leaving," I said, trying to escape the uncomfortable situation.

"So you're not going to do my sessions with me anymore?" Tianna asked, hurt evident in her voice.

"No, I'm sorry. I just can't look at you the same anymore. I'm really sorry about what happened. It's better if I go. This is really too much for me, and I don't think I'm the professional who can help you. You'll be alright with the nurse. Take care and be well. Again, I'm so, so, so sorry for all of this. But I trust your nurse. You'll be fine."

"But wait!" she exclaimed. "I want to stay with you. You said you would comfort me."

"I don't think I'm the right person either. I'm going to leave you alone. I'm sorry. This has never happened, okay? You're still my sister-in-law, but I think I'm going to take the job your aunt offered me. Goodbye."

I kissed her on the cheek and then ran away, feeling deeply ashamed.

I buried myself in my pillows and cried so hard. "Oh my god, what did I do? What did I do? This is so embarrassing. I want to leave. I'm going to escape from this country. I can't do it," I sobbed.

I immediately texted Aunt Daphne, letting her know I was taking her job. "I'm sorry, for turning down the offer, but if it’s still there I will take it.” I wrote.

I also texted Aaron. "Aaron, I'm still going."

"What?" he texted back. "But you said you would stay with Tianna. What happened?"

"No, nothing. I just think that's the best thing to do," I replied.

"Oh my god. This was an awkward day. I never want to remember this again. I wish I could lose my memory right now. I don't want to remember this at all."