Chapter 46: I’m here for you

Valencia, can you please stay with me? I'm so scared. I need you for every session. I have a feeling that I'm remembering you. I remember what we had."

"You do?" I asked, feeling a rush of conflicting emotions. What does she mean? Does it mean she remembers our affair now? That's crazy. I should say I'm down for it. Oh my god. Is that a good or a bad thing? I mean, my relationship with Aaron is improving sometimes, and then again, we're back at zero. No trust, no nothing. So, I don't know if this is a good thing to say. I'm just going to find out what she means, but for now, I'm not pushing anything.

"Well, I did get a job offer, and it's a while away from here. It's a distance away from here, so I'm really not sure that I can assist with being here for you emotionally and all, but just give me one moment to think this over. I will be happy to be here with you if I can," I said.

"That's good to hear. Just let me know, okay? Bye," she said.

"Bye," I replied, watching as she went inside to cool down her head, probably. I just sat there for a moment. Oh my god. Why is it so hard for me to make a decision right now? Do I have to turn down that offer and not work as a nurse? What should I do? Oh my god. My mind feels so empty right now. I really don't know what to do. Please help.

As I sat there for a while, Aaron entered the balcony.

"Hi," he said.

"Hi," I replied. "What are you doing here?"

"No, nothing. That's just, uh... Tianna, I had to sort some things out with her. What about you? Why are you here?"

"No reason, I guess. I just, uh... I wanted to come here again and tell you I'm sorry for interfering. That really wasn't my intention. I'm sorry again for it. I hope you know I really love you and, of course, if you go away that far, I will miss you. I just hope we never grow apart again. I don't want to lose you. You mean a lot to me."

I smiled. "Well, thank you.”

So, how is Tianna?"

"Well, it was just, uh... She's just so stressed. I think she's losing her mind. And, um, I'm really not trusting the nurses at that spot. Yeah, I'll try to stay with her and see how it goes. So, I'm thinking about turning down Aunt Daphne's job offer, but now I'm not sure."

"Just think it over, okay?" he said.

"Yeah, okay, sure.”

“Um, do you want some tea?" he asked.

"Yes, that could work for me. Green tea, please."

"Sure, coming right away."

"Thank you." I smiled. He kissed me and then went to the kitchen to get me some tea.

I felt so sick and greasy. Oh my god. When did I end up being like this? Do they call this rich people problems? When they say money cannot buy happiness, this is what they mean. This is all I wanted all my life—to have my life together, to be able to buy whatever my heart desires. But the emptiness I feel inside is overwhelming. I have a husband who loves me, but then again, I'm having feelings for my sister. Maybe it's for the best that she has lost her memories so that this could never happen again. But now she just told me she remembers me.

Yes, I want to stay because I care for her and want her to get better, but also because I'm selfish and want to remember every moment we had, every feeling she had for me. Oh my god, I sound so crazy in my mind right now. Why does every day end like this? I feel like a single mother of 10 children with a minimum wage. That's how crazy I feel right now. Oh my god, why do I keep worrying about these little things?

I think I'll visit a therapist. This really makes me feel lost. Maybe I need professional help.

Got it! Here's the revised passage with the correct character names:

"Valencia? Valencia! I've been calling you for like two minutes. Are you okay? Is your mind here? What's up?" Aaron asked, concern evident in his voice.

"No, nothing. I... I don't know. I'm just worried about Tianna. That's all," I replied, my voice tinged with anxiety.

"What’s up?”

“I was asking if you needed sugar."

"No, it's okay. Bring it over."

"Alright. You do know that you can talk to me, right?"

"I already told you what the problem is, and you will not be able to fix Tianna's memory right now so she can feel like herself again. So, I think you know the problem. Just, you're not able to solve it right now. So maybe, if I just think it over, I will come up with a solution. Yes?"

"Yes, okay. Sorry! Why are you so aggressive?" Aaron asked, puzzled.

"Do we have to do this right now, Aaron?" I asked, my patience wearing thin.

"I'm sorry, love. Sorry. Drink your tea. Do you need anything else?"

"No, it's good for now."

"Do you want me to stay here with you, or should I go?"

"Aaron, for God's sake. Do whatever you want. I don't care right now."

"Okay. But, I will stay. Let me give you a massage."

He started to play with my back. "How about a head massage? So... What do you think will make you feel whole again right now? Just for yourself. I know you're concerned about Tianna and that's really eating you up. But, what do you think could work right now? Do you want to go for a long walk or get some ice cream? What do you think?" Aaron asked, trying to lighten the mood.

"I really want to, but I'm really not feeling like it. I don't... have the energy to get up, so... I'm sorry, but I'll have to pass."

"No, it's okay. I'll stay here with you," he said, offering comfort.