Chapter 180: Chapter Fifty-Three-2

I nod. "I'm good right now. Whatever is happening, we'll get through it." "We?" Daniel says, his eyebrows a little raised in surprise. "Yes, we will—together." Around twenty-two minutes later thanks to morning traffic, the bus drops us off at Times Square. We hop off and walk through the mass retrieving their belongings until ours are secure. Daniel pulls me to an corner without people marching through and tells me our plan. "I'll take our stuff and bring them to the dorm. You take a cab or train and go to your mom. As soon as I'm done, I'll race back to you. Okay?" he says, his face determined and serious and not at all like Daniel usually is. But it makes me feel safe knowing he can be just as solemn as he can eccentric. I nod in response to which he mirrors before setting off to get a cab. For some strange reason, I grasp his hand before he leaves. It's really embarrassing and I don't know why I do it but words tumble out of my mouth. "I don't want to seem weak or anything but uh, could you just hurry? I just...I really don't want to be alone at the hospital...in case the news is really bad. I have to tell my brother and I know it'll be the worst feeling telling him and...." Daniel's look of surprise melts away into a soft expression. He walks back, taking my face in both of his hands. "You are not weak. You are one of the strongest girls I've ever loved. Hell yes, I will hurry. I'll drive the cab myself if I have to." He laughs but I'm frozen as I replay his words. Love. Did he say love? What? What does that mean? I don't know— I'm— "You okay?" he asks, catching my skin paling. "Do you need to rest?" He didn't even realize he said it. Which means it's okay. It wasn't meant to be said. It's something we can talk about later. "I-I'm good. Thank you. I just needed reassurance. Thank you so much for everything, Daniel. See you in a few then?" "Sounds good." I lean in and give him a quick kiss on the lips before he goes. Daniel grins big and it's so bright it makes me feel fuzzy inside. Then he catches a cab and I start to jog to the subway. As soon as I step inside the hospital, the anxious fear comes crawling back into my stomach. I feel like throwing up the entire time I walk across the lobby. Down the familiar hallways. Until I reach the same elevator I always take. Mom's room has been changed since Madam Jin's conversation two weeks back. It feels like forever ago but it only happened recently. That I'm her—what even would I be—her granddaughter? I think over Madam Jin's conversation in my head as I zombie walk to Mom's room. The security recognize me and I pass by in a daze. There's a group of doctors standing outside her room, clipboards in hand as they discuss my mother in whispers. They probably just must've done whatever was needed to help her. When I walk up to them, their conversation stops. For some reason, I don't ask the billion questions I want to. All I can manage to say is, "Can I see her?" A new young doctor answers. I haven't seen her before but she seems like business with her straightforward look and serious face. Well, nobody would be happy in this situation. "Mrs. Flores is stable right now and there's someone with—well, first her conditions are—" "C-can I just see her for now? Or is that not okay? I'd like to talk about her conditions after I see her, if that's all right?" I say, interrupting her before she can tell me whatever terrible news she's been holding onto. She presses her lips together and nods, the other doctors looking wary and solemn. "Thank you." I don't know why but my voice is quiet and my throat begins to choke up again. She's not dead. They would tell me that. That much I know. So, there's nothing to be so sad about. Yet, anyway. I turn on my heel, facing the white door that I've walked through many times since she's been moved. There's a tiny window but it's blurry on purpose so there's not much you can see. Slowly, I take a deep breath in and let it out, counting in my head. 1, 2, 3. I press open the door and am surprised when I see three men in suits standing there. I look over the first man, his face one I've never seen. Usually, I'm not so paranoid. But with Madam Jin's stories and the pressure of the whole situation, I am ready to throw a chair at any stranger that I do not feel safe with or do not know well enough. "Who are you?" I demand, my voice infused with more venom than I realized. "Me?" the man has the nerve to say. He's in a black suit, black tie. Ear piece in. Why in the world is security inside the room? Their rules are clear. They guard the entrance and if there seems to be a problem, but the doctors are outside and what could security guards do to protect my mother that the doctors can't? I look at the pin on his chest—it's different from Madam Jin's security. I eye the area around me, looking for a weapon of any sort. Next to me, near the entrance is a tiny vase meant to hold flowers, not to bash people's heads in, but I'll take my chances. I grab it and dump the flowers out, pointing it at him. "Step back from my mother. Who are you?" "Uh—I—" His eyes wander to behind me, questioning what to say.