Chapter 7 THE LAST NAME HE CALLED
Ragnar’s Pov
What a night.
The moon was up in the sky like a watchful eye of the Goddess, pale and distant. I stood alone at my window, sweatpants low on my hips, bare arms crossed against the wind.
It felt like I’d been grinding my teeth all day. I was getting a headache and I forced myself to breathe slowly, for the nth time today. In through the nose. Out through the mouth. I’d panic later, if there was room for it.
Something was coming.
The pack didn’t know, I wouldn’t discuss it with them— wouldn’t bother them— until it was necessary. But I knew.
I had been Alpha long enough to recognize the calm before the storm, the countdown before a fight, no matter how little. This lull, this hollow space before it, when there was unease in the air. Little things not adding up. Rumors half-heard. Scouts returning with uneasy eyes, and ghost stories. Borders tested, then tested again.
Something was coming. And I hated not knowing what.
I’d have to start arranging meetings with the other Alphas. I’d make sure I hadn’t inadvertently stepped on anyone’s toes. I’d see who answered my call and how they received me. See if I was a prey or the prey.
I closed my eyes and let my thoughts trace the map in my head. Allies. Enemies. Old grudges, the ones truly forgotten and those that never were never really buried.
I’d go to BlackPine first, even though they weren’t our closest neighbors. They were the one of the only packs who were both strong enough to stand up to mine and stupid enough to actually do so. BlackPine was loud when it moved, arrogant, but I knew they could quiet in their dealings.
Their Alpha wasn’t too fond of me either.
I fidgeted a bit and that motion made me catch a whiff of a scent; of woodsmoke, after a rainy day. Immediately my thoughts turned. A flicker of warmth cut through the tension, unbidden. Him.
My jaw tightened. Of course I find my mate now, with everything feeling like it would turn.
I smelled him first outside the door, while I was trying to release some tension. Running during the hunt hadn’t helped much. I’d been antsy all night, all the way back to when I walked out to open the ceremony, if I was being honest with myself.
Inadvertently, I zeroed in on him. Suddenly I couldn’t focus on what I was doing anymore, even though I hadn’t realized why. I might as well have been brushing a feather in my nostril for all the pleasure I was getting.
Until my wolf, Yurik, began stirring.
Only something dangerous made Yurik stir, even when I was shifted.
Then he’d walked in and as soon as he wasn’t blocked by a thick wooden door, as soon as Yurik saw his eyes, he’d claimed him as his mate.
I shrunk away.
Not because I didn't feel anything toward him. Because suddenly I felt it too much.
But all that was going through my head was ‘why now’?
A mate was a luxury, a promise I couldn’t afford to make right now. Every instinct in me wanted to pull him close, to bury myself in that connection to the hilt.
But every hard-earned lesson told me that doing so now would fracture my focus. And I needed to be present.
But then I couldn’t resist. He was right there, so stunning. I’d seen him around the pack before, and while I never took him to heart, my passing thought about him was, admittedly, that there was something beautiful about him.
At first I’d thought his hair was black but then he stepped closer and I could see it was the rich, dark shade of my morning coffee. He was tall but still probably half a foot shorter than I was. I could see he was lean, and I’d wonder if he was eating if it wasn’t for the slight muscle definition I could see in his arms, especially when he gripped my cock.
Fuck, I couldn’t think like that right now.
And Goddess, his eyes…
They were a swirling shade of calming hazel. I imagined that was what it felt like being hypnotized, looking into them. They shone with innocence and with curiosity, and I wanted to dig deeper to see what else I could unearth.
But I wouldn't have the chance to do that. Not yet. And so I was a little harsh with him. Yurik was yipping his displeasure when a thought flashed in my head slyly.
If I was going to refuse myself him, I might as well get just a little taste. Just one.
I didn’t know how long all these threats of death would last, and he was fucking offering.
What could it hurt?
And then I went and asked him if the had a mate, wanted to,selfishly, hear him say me, even with everything banging around in my head.
I opened my eyes and stared back out over the darkened land. Somewhere out there, forces were moving pieces I couldn’t see. I needed information— real information, cold hard facts.
I’d need to fortify the patrols, but gently, slowly. I wouldn’t want to make the packs that didn’t have anything to do with this agitated. Happy neighbors, happy life.
The anxiety sat heavy in his chest, a constant pressure. It wasn’t the sharp terror of imminent attack, not quite yet, but the grinding dread of uncertainty. I could fight an enemy. I could plan around known numbers. But this, right now, was fucking fog, and until they showed their hand I had nothing.
My mate’s face rose in my mind again, unasked for. The way he’d looked at me like I wasn’t a monster, like he didn’t know the things I’d done. He was nervous and maybe even afraid to be in my room, but it was a juvenile type of fear, not the one I was used to; the one accompanied by the forgone conclusion that I was a monster albeit one that protected.
That, more than the bond itself, had strangely endeared him to us.
But of course he didn’t know, he didn’t look a day over twenty two. What was the moon goddess thinking, giving me someone so young? What was the goddess thinking, giving me someone again?
I couldn’t… he wouldn’t…
I exhaled slowly, letting the thought pass without chasing it. One didn’t question the Goddess.
There would be time later, for speculation and theories. If the war broke toward my lands, my first duty was clear. Pack before self. Always. It helped that he was safe and here under my metaphorical roof, that he couldn’t be used as a pin to get under my skin.
Whatever was coming, I would meet it standing. And when, if, the war finally showed its face, I would already be ready.
Then maybe I could revisit this bond thrumming under my chest.