Chapter 21 021
RYAN
The moment we got to my place, Zara started running around like she owned the apartment.
One second she was clinging to my leg, peering around like she was mapping the place in her head, and the next she took off down the hallway with a delighted shriek, her little sneakers thudding against the floor. Her laughter echoed off the walls, bright and unfiltered, like she hadn’t a single worry in the world.
I dropped her overnight bag on the couch and followed after her, pretending to stalk her like a monster. I bent my fingers into exaggerated claws and growled low in my throat.
“I’m gonna get you,” I warned.
She squealed with pure joy, and ran faster. Her curls bounced wildly as she dodged the coffee table, laughing so hard she could barely stay upright. My chest tightened watching her. Watching how easily she filled the space. How natural it felt to chase my daughter across my living room like this had always been our routine.
I lunged for her and missed on purpose.
“Daddy can’t catch me!” she teased, glancing back over her shoulder.
Daddy.
The word hit me square in the chest, but I barely had time to process it before she tripped.
It happened so fast. One wrong step. One tiny foot catching the edge of the rug.
She went down hard.
Face-first.
The laughter stopped instantly.
Her lip wobbled. Those big blue eyes filled with tears. For half a second, there was stunned silence, the kind that always comes before the storm.
Then the crying started.
Loud. Sharp. Heartbreaking.
The kind of cry that claws straight through your ribcage and squeezes your heart until it hurts to breathe.
I dropped to my knees beside her. “Hey—hey, princess. Come here.”
She barely waited for me to reach her before throwing herself into my arms. I scooped her up, and she buried her face into my neck, her sobs turning frantic as her little body shook against mine.
I rubbed her back in slow circles, rocking her gently. “Shh… It’s okay. You’re okay. Daddy’s got you.”
Daddy’s got you.
The words felt foreign and perfect at the same time.
But the crying didn’t slow. It got louder. More desperate.
She hiccupped against my shoulder, clutching my shirt with tiny fists. “I want Mr Bear.”
My stomach dropped.
I swallowed hard and carried her to the couch, sitting down carefully with her still clinging to me. “Okay, okay. We’ll find him.”
I reached for the overnight bag Emily had packed, unzipping it quickly with one hand. I dug through it, my movements getting more frantic by the second.
Pajamas.
Her favorite blanket.
Extra clothes.
Her sippy cup.
I pushed everything aside and searched again, deeper this time. I turned the bag inside out, checking the pockets, the seams, like maybe the bear had magically slipped into the lining.
Nothing.
No Mr Bear.
A sharp, bitter understanding settled in my chest.
Emily had left him behind. On purpose.
Damn.
It wasn’t fair—but I couldn’t even be mad.
I’d hurt her by telling Zara to sleep over tonight.
Zara’s sobs turned frantic. “Where’s Mr Bear? I need Mr Bear!”
Her voice cracked on the word need, and something inside me cracked with it.
I felt completely out of my depth.
I didn’t know how she liked to be held when she was upset.
I didn’t know how to fix this.
I’d walked into boardrooms without blinking. I’d handled million-dollar deals. But this—this tiny, heartbroken girl in my arms—terrified me.
I reached for my phone with shaking hands and video-called my cousin Hazel.
She picked up almost immediately, her face filling the screen. Her brows shot up in surprise. “Ryan? Are you doing sleepovers with your daughter now? That was fast.”
“I don’t know what to do,” I said, my voice rough.
I tilted the camera so she could see Zara curled against my chest, her face red and tear-streaked.
Hazel’s expression softened instantly. “Oh. Hey, sweet girl. What happened?”
Zara peeked at the phone through wet lashes. Her crying slowed just a little when she saw a new face. She reached out with chubby fingers. “Phone.”
I let her hold it carefully.
Hazel smiled widely. “Hi, beautiful. I’m your Aunt Hazel. Look at those pretty eyes. You got them from your daddy, huh?”
Zara sniffled. “Yeah.”
Something warm and painful spread through my chest.
Hazel’s voice turned gentle, soothing, the way it always did when we were kids. “You fell, didn’t you? Ouchies hurt. But you’re so brave.”
Zara nodded, wiping her nose on my shirt.
Hazel tilted her head. “Want me to sing you something?”
Another nod.
Hazel started singing the same lullaby our grandma used to sing us when we were little. Slow. Soft. Familiar. Her voice wobbled slightly on the high notes, but Zara didn’t care.
She stared at the screen like Hazel was magic.
Her sobs softened into hiccups.
Then quiet sniffles.
Then nothing at all.
Thirty minutes later, Zara’s head was heavy on my shoulder, her breathing slow and even.
Hazel whispered, “She’s out.”
I swallowed hard. “Thank you.”
Hazel smiled, eyes shiny. “Anytime. She’s perfect, Ry.”
“She called me Dad today,” I said quietly. My voice broke on the word. “And I asked Emily if she could come home with me tonight.”
Hazel nodded slowly. “How did Emily feel?”
“Not good.” I dragged my free hand over my face. “I get it. I just… I want to do this right.”
“You will,” Hazel said gently. “You’re already doing it.”
I looked down at Zara’s sleeping face. “Have you heard from my Mom?”
Hazel sighed. “No. Last time I went home, she refused to see me. Refused to see anyone. But she’ll come around.”
“I’ll reach out to her again,” I said.
We said goodbye, and I ended the call.
I carried Zara to my bedroom, every step careful. She didn’t stir when I changed her into her pajamas, and I was grateful for that small mercy.
I tucked her under the covers, pulling the blanket up to her chin.
Then I just sat there.
Watched her breathe.
Her tiny chest rising and falling.
Her hand curled near her cheek.
So peaceful.
I sat on the edge of the bed for a long time.
I didn’t turn on the TV.
I didn’t check my phone.
I just watched my daughter sleep.
I’d missed three years of nights like this.
Three years of bedtime stories.
Three years of checking under the bed for monsters.
Three years of her waking up scared and needing someone to hold her.
I’d missed it all.
But she was here now.
And I was here now.
I lay down on top of the covers beside her, fully dressed, afraid to move too much and wake her.
I watched her until my eyes grew heavy.
I fell asleep listening to her soft breaths and that felt like the biggest miracle of my life.