Chapter 75

“M’not.”

“Yes you are,” he said firmly. “I think you are the most incredible man that I have ever met. You are the man who has made me feel like I can be attractive. You make me feel like I can be sexy. You’re the guy who has repaired my totally shattered confidence. You’re the one who made up a rule banning me from wearing anything more than underwear when it’s just the two of us, in order to give me that confidence. You’re the one who has put up again and again with my family’s completely wrong assessment of you, but put up with it because you love me.”

Rob was straining against the cuffs, clenching around the strap-on, but Eli refused to stop. Rob needed to hear it; Eli was going to repeat it until it got into that thick skull of his.

“Your background is crap. Your history is crap. Your parents were crap. But you are an amazing, complicated, generous, dedicated guy. You still look out for your baby brother even now you’re both adults. You protected him when you were younger. You didn’t walk away from me when you found out what I used to be, even though you’re gay and it would have been reasonable for you to think this wasn’t an option. I am getting a hawk tattooed on my chest because of how incredibly good you have been for me, and I love you.”

Rob shivered at the stress, goose bumps prickling across his skin. Eli pressed harder into Rob’s back, stretching to kiss his neck.

“Do you believe that?” he whispered there. “That I love you?”

“Yes.”

Rob’s voice was very thin and faint, the rasp so strong it nearly obliterated the reply. Eli bit his lip. It didn’t sound too convincing.

“I love you,” he said quietly. “That’s the base for everything. I love you. More than anything or anyone. I have cut my dad out of this for you. I will cut my whole family out for you if I have to. You are the priority for me, Rob. You have been better for me than them, and you are not what you look like. I know that, because I love you.”

Rob’s hands were balled into fists above the cuffs and shaking. Eli stroked his hands over Rob’s skin, catching heat and tiny beads of sweat on his fingertips, and began to kiss whatever was within reach.

“I love you, and you belong to me,” he whispered. “You are mine. I am never letting go of you, not for anything, because you have been the best thing to ever happen to me. And if I have to tell you that every single day, if I have to repeat it for you the way I repeat it for Dad just how utterly incredible you really are under all that swagger and sneering, then I will.”

Rob coughed, twisting his face to the side. The blindfold was damp. “Fuck me,” he croaked, his voice cracking in the middle. “Just—just shut up and fuck me, please, please…”

“No,” Eli whispered, but he did deepen his movements into proper thrusts, beginning to tilt his hips the way Rob liked best and rock him properly against the mattress. He kept talking and kissing though, the fucking gentler than Eli had ever given, and who cared if Eli wouldn’t get off on this, this topping with tenderness? It was about Rob right now, and Eli couldn’t give less of a fuck about his own orgasm.

It didn’t take long, Rob grinding down against the mattress and Eli whispering endearments and the little things he liked about their relationship and about Rob. When Rob snarled and shuddered his way through his release, Eli slowly withdrew, kissing down Rob’s spine as he pulled out and removed the strap-on. He did, however, heat and slick up one of the larger plugs in his hands before filling Rob again, and twisting it firmly into place.

“You need reminding, tonight, just who owns you,” he murmured, kissing the top of Rob’s thigh as he worked, then he slid up the bed and kissed Rob on the corner of the mouth. “But you’re staying here. I’m keeping you tied down tonight. You can’t run away every time you’re upset.”

Rob nudged his face into Eli’s, his breathing shaky. Eli gently removed the blindfold and kissed his eyelids. Those white-grey irises were rimmed in pink when his eyes slid open, and Eli kissed under them, too.

“Hey,” he murmured, cupping Rob’s face in both hands. “I love you. You’re brilliant for me. You might be a mess sometimes, but you’re brilliant. All I ever wanted was some peace and quiet between you and my family, never to make you feel bad.”

Rob swallowed convulsively, and nodded, though his gaze slid away. Eli’s heart ached.