Chapter 4: Chapter Four

Sara’s mouth fell open. If she’d been shocked before, it was nothing compared to the cold clammy feeling she had now. The blood roared in her head and the room got fuzzy as if she wasn’t really there. Her knees trembled. Only Buck’s hands clenched around the back of her arms held her upright.

“What? Was he nuts?”

The only good part was that Cord looked as shocked as she felt. Guess old Jackson hadn’t told him everything either.

Jackson nodded. “He knew you’d feel that way, which is why he put that loop hole in there.”

Cord glared at the attorney. His usual composure was definitely shaken as he stuttered, “Wh-what do you mean?”

Jackson shrugged and shuffled the documents back into his briefcase. “Beau told me that he wanted to see Sara settle down with someone who could tame her a bit, someone who would spoil her a bit, and put up with her—but put his foot down with her at the same time. He always thought Cord would be a perfect match so, he figured he’d toss that in there on the remote chance that the ranch meant enough to the two of you to marry each other.”

He snapped his briefcase closed. “Sara, your father told me that you were insistent on never getting married. It bothered him. He thought you were going to be a cowboy forever and never settle down with a family.”

“As good girls do right?” Sara seethed. She and her father had argued that point for years. He’d been firmly set in the dark ages when it came to women. Oh, he had no problem with them out working the ranch and getting paid for a man’s work, but, in his heart, he believed that all women who had careers were simply working until they got married and had babies. “I knew he was a chauvinist, but this is unbelievable.”

She glared at Cord. He hadn’t said much, but now he looked as cool and composed as ever and that only made her madder. “How come you’re not saying anything?”

He leaned back in the chair. “I’m trying to take all this in and think about it rationally rather than emotionally. Frankly, I can’t believe Beau did this either, but there has to be a way around it. It doesn’t sound completely legal to me. “

Sara nodded. “Yeah, this can’t be legal, Jackson. It can’t possibly stand up in court in this day and age.”

He shook his head. “This is Texas. This type of thing happens all the time and, believe me, it stands up in court. This stipulation is actually very simple, you marry Cord, or you lose controlling interest of your half of the ranch. I’m not saying it’s fair. You can try and fight it in court but you won’t win, and it will cost you a lot of money, not to mention being tied up in the legal system for years.”

“What if she had already been married when he died? What then?”

Buck’s words came from behind her. She didn’t realize how hard she was leaning against him until his voice vibrated through her back.

“He probably would have changed the Will if Sara was married, or maybe he wouldn’t have bothered with the clause and left controlling interest to Cord. How do I know what he would have done?” Jackson shrugged. “Look, I know this will sounds heartless but come on, Sara. It’s not like you’re homeless and out on the streets. Technically, things won’t even change that much. This is your home, you still have an interest in the business. Frankly, it’s Cord who should be annoyed if anyone. His whole life is being turned upside down and rests completely on what you decide. Although, I suppose he could refuse to marry you.” He glanced at the other man who returned his stare steadily neither agreeing nor denying his statement.

“She’s not marrying Cord.”

Buck turned Sara around to face him. The look in his eyes took her right back to last night. Warmth flooded her face and she swallowed.

His green eyes pierced her own. “You don’t need to make any decisions right now. You need to think hard on this.” He glanced over at Jackson and then back. “Maybe even get a second legal opinion.”

She wanted what her father had always promised her. She wanted her share of the Double B. It wasn’t a matter of how much the business was worth, that didn’t matter to her. What she wanted was the life her father always told her she’d have. She wanted to be the one to continue what her father and grandfather had begun—she didn’t want to answer to Cord.

Her chest burned. “I can’t breathe,” she murmured, sliding her hand across her chest. “I gotta get out of here.” She stepped out of Buck’s embrace and flew from the den.

Buck’s first instinct was to go after her, but he knew she’d rather cry in private. He’d talk to her later, when she was ready to talk. Meanwhile, he glared at his brother and the attorney. “There wasn’t an easier way to break this to her?”

“You think we haven’t tried to figure that out the past couple of months?”

Buck braced his feet apart and stared at Cord. “You’ll marry Sara over my dead body.”

His brother raised one eyebrow. “You know she’s not going to let the ranch go. Her only option is marriage to me.”

“You don’t want to be married to her.”

Cord shook his head. “Nope, but that’s what Beau wanted, and that’s what I’ll do. I owe him that. We owe him that.”

“We owe him to take care of Sara and her sisters, which can be done without you ruining her life by marrying her.”

“It’s not as bad an idea as it seems. I need a wife and heirs, she needs to know she’s running the show or she’ll go crazy and you know it. We have to help each other.”

When Cord mentioned family, a sudden image of Sara in his brother’s bed, in his arms, flashed through Buck’s mind. He instantly saw red. Storming across the room, he stopped just short of reaching for Cord and hauling him out of the chair. “I am not going to stand by and watch you two marry for the sake of a piece of dirt. She deserves better than that, and, damn it, so do you!”

Teddy, quiet until now, moved to stand next to Buck. “I have to agree with Buck on this, Cord. You’re not thinking clear. You can’t marry Sara.”

Jackson shifted uncomfortably and Buck turned to him. “Why didn’t you stop Beau? Why didn’t you tell him this was the stupidest idea he’s ever had?”

“You think I didn’t? I tried to talk him out of this a million times since he wrote that Will, but he was determined this was how it was going to be.”

“He could have done something like named a bunch of guardians or trustees or something to help her. Hell, I don’t know, but there had to be a better option than this!”

“There wasn’t. We went round and round about it. Maybe if Sara had talked to him about getting married in the future, having kids, he would have been satisfied. But she kept talking about being a cowboy forever, and never changing. You know damn well she’s uncontrollable and always has been. Sleeping out with the cowboys on roundups, playing poker half the night, drinking at the LoneStar.” He threw up his hands. “She does everything the cowboys do except pee standing up! It's time for Sara to grow up and you know it. Flo and Beau both tried to convince her it was time to act more like lady of the house.”

“But that’s not her! She’s not the lady of the house, she’s a cowboy and a rancher damn it, and damned good at both.”

Cord cut him off with a raise of his hand. “No one’s denying that. She’s a better cowboy than anyone I know, but she doesn’t know squat about the business and what it takes to actually run this place. Even you have to admit that. She needs to understand that I have to do this. Her father knew it. Can’t you make her understand that I’m not trying to be her boss or anyone else’s boss, I just want to do what’s best for the business. You get that don’t you? It makes no difference to you that you don’t have controlling interest of our half.”

Buck narrowed his eyes. “How do you know it makes no difference to me?” He was rewarded by the look of surprise and then concern on Cord’s face.

His brother slowly stood up. “I didn’t know it bothered you; you never said.”

“What good would it have done? He left things the way he wanted to. I don’t argue with the dead.”

Cord’s eyes revealed his shock, and he turned to his other brother. “You feel that way too?”

Teddy threw up his hands. “Don’t drag me into this. I wouldn’t want to be in your shoes for all the beer at the LoneStar. I’m very happy living the good life without the responsibility.”

Which wasn’t entirely true, and Buck and Ted exchanged a glance. Teddy had this ability of making it look like he was nothing but a rambling cowboy, no responsibilities, no ties, but he knew that if his younger brother ever had to step up he would. He’d like to believe the same about Tyler, the youngest brother, but lately his actions hadn’t made him feel like he even wanted to be part of the business. Buck drew his thoughts back to the present problem; they’d figure out the Tyler situation later.

“Are you going to talk to her?”

Cord’s request was more of a command but Buck let it go unchallenged. “What the hell do you think? Of course I’m going to talk to her. But you stay away from her. Give her some space.”

“Fine.” Cord nodded. “I’ll give her time to let this all sink in before I talk to her again. Trust me on this, would you? This may be the perfect solution. Who else is she going to marry that’s going to let her do whatever she wants?”

Buck almost blurted out what was really on his mind. Instead, he quickly reworded his thoughts. “What if she’s in love with someone else? Don’t her feelings matter in all this, or is it strictly business?”

“Sara in love?” Cord laughed.

Buck clenched his fist, itching to let it connect with his brother’s jaw.

“With who? Cole? Sara’s not in love with anyone and you know it.”

Buck opened his mouth then slammed it closed. He’d handle this himself. He had to. There was no way he was letting Cord anywhere near Sara. His only problem would be in convincing her that being with him was more important than running this ranch.

Shoving his hat back on his head, he stormed from the room.

****

The pool balls scattered like chickens with a fox in the yard. Relentless, Sara twisted around the table and hit them again, harder, watching with satisfaction as several went into pockets.

That’s how things were supposed to be with her life, everything in the right pocket. How the heck did it all get so screwed up?

She shot again, this time with so much force the balls bounced on the green felt. Since she was barely old enough to sit alone in the saddle, her father told her how one day everything he had would be hers and her sisters’. He’d warned her that it would be tough for her to gain the respect of men who worked for her, but she could do it. He believed in her.

“He believed in me? Hah! Bullshit,” she muttered, taking another whack at the balls.

All those years she’d studied how he did things and watched him handle different situations so she’d be ready. Just last spring, he’d turned the entire round-up operation over to her and Buck. They’d hired the temporary hands, supervised the permanent ones and, for all intents and purposes, ran the entire thing now. He’d even told them both what a great job they’d done and was more than happy to let them deal with that side of the business.

So what changed? Her mind raced backwards, wondering what she could have done different or said that would have made him more confident in her abilities.

Shaking her head, Sara leaned her stick against the table and re-rack the balls into the center.

“Hey.”

Sara didn’t bother to look up at the sound of Buck’s voice. It didn’t surprise her that he’d shown up here, she’d known he’d come. She also knew he’d been waiting awhile, giving her some space. But if he was hoping her temper had cooled, he better think again. If anything, it had actually gotten worse, and no amount of beer or pool games were going to calm her down.

On her next shot, the balls clanged against one another hard enough to make the few patrons in the bar turn and glare. She glared back, hoping somebody wanted to start something. She’d love to take her anger out on some poor, unsuspecting sap right about now.

She caught Buck glancing at the beer bottles lined up and she lifted her chin, daring him to comment. She’d be more than happy to take her anger out on him too, and he deserved it.

Without a word, he reached for a stick and chalked up.

They played silently, the balls slamming into the pockets the only noise.

“Nine ball in side pocket,” she finally called and lined up her cue stick, but missed. Uttering curses that would make most cowboys blush, she reached for her beer and drank the rest of it.

Buck moved into position. “Nine ball, corner pocket,” he muttered and easily sunk it.

Any other time, he would be gloating loudly and making her pay for losing. A sudden memory of last night’s bet flashed into her mind. She tore her gaze off him, but then found herself staring once more. Why did he look different to her today? And why was she so aware of him all of a sudden? His body, the same one that pressed hard against her last night, now leaned across the pool table and she found herself admiring the bulging muscles in his arms as he drew back the pool stick. Her face grew heated when he turned and caught her stare.

“You okay?”

“I don’t want to talk about it.” Whether he meant about the Will or the kiss last night didn’t matter. She had no intention of discussing either one.

He shrugged and reached for the balls to re-rack them. “I didn’t ask you to.”

“I know that’s why you’re here. That, and you think I’ll get too drunk to drive home.”

“Wouldn’t you do the same? If you knew I was planning to get plastered, wouldn’t you be here?”

She shrugged and rolled the two balls in front of her across the green table towards him. “That’s different.”

“How so?” He had all the balls gathered into the triangle, but rather than remove the barrier and start another game, he held out his hand for her stick. She was sick of playing. It was weird how he always knew what she was feeling. After placing the pool cues in the rack, he leaned back against the table, picked up his beer and drank—all without taking his eyes off her.

Sara took a deep breath and swallowed hard, but her eyes were dry. They didn’t burn with unshed tears and there was no lump in her throat. Earlier, she figured the second she was alone in her truck she’d sob like a widow but it hadn’t happened. There was only this intense burn in her gut.

“I can’t believe this crap.” She dropped into a chair and twisted the top off another beer. The bartender must have decided she could have more once Buck walked in because up, until then, he’d been trying his best to slow her down.

Buck took the seat across from her. “I don’t get it, that’s for sure.”

“Can you see me married to Cord?” Her voice choked on his name. She cleared her throat and tipped her beer back.

“Not in a million years,” he said quietly.

“What was my father thinking?”

Buck shrugged, set his bottle down and crossed his arms over his chest. “I have no idea.”

“Maybe I should have gone to college, took some courses in business or something. But he never mentioned it, never said it was something that would matter.”

“I know.”

Her stomach heaved and a desolate sensation swept over her. She placed her beer on the table, suddenly not interested in it anymore. Loosely folding her hands, she dropped them between her knees. They were rough and calloused and she couldn’t remember the last time she’d bothered putting lotion on. She lifted her hand and examined her nails. Chipped and short where she’d bitten them down, a few had dirt shoved so deep under the nail she couldn’t get it out.

“I can’t imagine Cord wanting to be married to me anyway. I mean look at me.” She held her hands out, palm sides up. “We both know Cord likes the type of woman who looks good whether she’s cooking up a huge dinner or listening to classical music. She’d never have a hair out of place or a wrinkle in her clothes.” She laughed. “I’m as far from that as you can get.”

When Buck didn’t comment after a moment, she looked up. Her heart skittered at the raw emotion etched on his rugged face—possessiveness mixed with anger and it drew her memory to the kiss last night. With a flash the look was gone, his expression blank.

“You always said you were never going to get married. Why change what you believe in?” he finally asked.

“Are you joking? I don’t have any choice, don’t you see that?”

“You’re the one that isn’t seeing the choice. When it comes right down to it, the Double B is just a piece of land.”

A sudden, thin chill hung in the air between them. Her mouth dropped open in shock. “I can’t believe you just said that!”

She knew he never had the same strong attachment to the ranch that she did, but she always thought he understood how she felt. “This ranch may only be a piece of land to you, but it’s my whole life and I want it.” Sara lowered her voice, conscious of the other bar patrons. In a town as small as Sweet Meadow, this would be the biggest news in decades. If word got out that she and Cord were even contemplating a marriage, the story would be the biggest news flash in months. They’d be splashed on the front page of the local paper by tomorrow morning. Although the family was well respected, people in Sweet Meadow loved good gossip and anything happening on the Double B made the story even bigger.

“You really want to wake up next to my brother for the rest of your life?”

Fiery green eyes glared at her and she frowned back. Bile rose in her throat at the very idea of sleeping with Cord. It wasn’t that he was repulsive, but he was like her older brother or a favorite uncle. Her stomach heaved just thinking about it. Still, he was a man—only a little older than her—and a good, solid dependable guy. She could do a lot worse. “Women have been marrying men they don’t love to save their homes for years.”

Buck rolled his eyes and snorted. Pushing away from the table, he shook his head. “Now you’re being dramatic. Come on, you’re not going to be out on your ear. Hell, your bank balance isn’t even going to dip! You just won’t be able to make final decisions—big deal.”

Sara flew to her feet, a flash of raw grief coursing through her. “It is a big deal! It’s everything!”

“I know, I know.” He raked his hand through his hair. “Damn it though, don’t do something hasty without really thinking it through. I know you, and you’re going to jump without looking to see if there’s water in the pool. Stop and think first, that’s what I’m saying. There’s no urgency here.”

She forced back the bile in her throat. He was right. She needed to think through all her options and find out exactly what her rights were before agreeing to anything. “I wonder how much time I have to make up my mind.”

Buck set his empty beer bottle down on the table. “You should probably talk to Jackson privately, without Cord there. Really work through all the legal aspects of this.”

She nodded eagerly. “Will you go with me? I might not think to ask all the right questions.”

“You mean you think you might just choke the living crap out of him.”

Sara smirked. “That too.” He smiled at her and she relaxed. This was familiar ground, the tension gone between them. Relief washed over her, maybe they were going to be okay after all. He’d help her solve this mess and they’d go back to being best friends again with everything that happened last night left behind them.

“Let me know and we’ll drive into his office.” He pulled his wallet out of his back pocket and took a step towards the bar. “You want something to eat?”

“I’m sure Bill’s already got a steak on the grill with my name on it. He’s been bugging me to eat since the third beer. Fusses worse than Flo.”

She turned around to pick up her empty beer bottle and his hand grabbed her arm. Buck’s fingers on her bare skin sent shivers through her. So much for thinking last night was all behind her. Why was his touch affecting her so much now? Her pulse skipped a beat as heat coursed through her. Face flushed, she only hoped he’d think it was the alcohol.

“About last night...” His voice was low and rough as if he struggled with the right words.

Sara dipped her head and stared at his chest as her cheeks burned. “I don’t want to talk about that.”

“I know, but I need to say something.”

Had his chest always been this broad? Her palms remembered the hardness of his muscles when they’d touched him last night. His heart had beat so hard, like it was pulsing through her skin. All hot and muscular and...

“That bet was one of my stupider moves. I’m sorry.”

The tears that wouldn’t come earlier now lay too close to the surface. She blinked rapidly.

His hand on her arm became a caress, but she didn’t think he knew he was stroking her. His rough palm slid up and landed on her shoulder. Her body began to tingle and, even more shocking, her nipples pebbled. What the hell is going on? One kiss between them, and suddenly she’s all aware of Buck as a guy and thinking about maybe even...kissing him again?

She dragged her attention back to what he was saying.

“You know how sometimes, something seems like a really good idea and the more you think about it, the more you think it’s a great idea—especially if you’ve had a few?”

She nodded but couldn’t speak.

“That’s what happened last night.”

His finger caught under her chin and forced her to look up. Immediately, Sara recalled how his firm lips had caressed her own. A tumble of emotions assailed and confused her. What was going on? This was her best friend, her buddy, and suddenly all she could think about was how hard his body was and how incredible it felt pressed into her own.

“I’m sorry. It’ll never happen again.”

His eyes searched hers and she hoped he wasn’t seeing any of her thoughts at the moment. She hoped he saw how much he’d hurt her, and not the part of her that wished he’d kiss her again.

“I would do anything to take it all back.” His voice was as close to a plea as she’d ever heard.

Trying to be casual and not let him guess at any of what was going on inside, she aimed for a simple shrug. “Forget it. We’ve all gotten drunk and done stupid things. I guess it wasn’t that big of a deal.”

She pulled away and picked up the empty beer bottles. Her heart raced and she hoped he’d drop the conversation while she could still pretend it was no big deal.

“Hey,” he called.

She twisted her head to look at him over her shoulder.

“Are we ‘us’ again?”

Buck Weston was the toughest, roughest cowboy in Sweet Meadow, and never worried about what anyone thought. But standing before her now, face drawn and hands in his pockets, he looked like a kicked puppy. She was shocked by the fear in his eyes. If he was afraid of losing what they had, she understood that completely. Needing to put him at ease, and also needing to reassure herself that they’d be fine, she held out her hand.

“No one else would put up with you.”

He grinned and squeezed her fingers. She squeezed back, he squeezed harder and before too long they were arm wrestling as if they were twelve. Life had certainly been less complicated back then.

Those days were long gone.