Chapter 42

It had already been hours since I was gone so I knew I had to leave soon before Hades got suspicious. I had caught up with her and told her everything and she had given me clarification of things I was experiencing in life.

“Aphrodite is my mother so I could see why you thought you were her child. She is the most beautiful woman ever. She’s kind but also very structured. She begged me not to marry Hades, but I was young and in love with him. I really thought he would change for me, but he didn’t. But anyways she was someone who all the men wanted because there was something so alluring about her. I guess she passed it down to you, but it made it worse knowing you are a wolf who is supposed to be destined for one.”

She had used her fingers to comb my bangs out of my eyes and she held them. For the first time, I got to experience a mother’s touch. I melted into her hands and enjoyed it, but I knew we had a lot to work out.

“I had no reason to fight up until this point, my daughter. I am going to get you and my grandchild away from him. You just have to trust me.”

Here I went crying again. Trust… That was the hardest thing for me to do because everyone I trusted has let me down a time or two.

“I don’t trust anyone, because I’ve been betrayed too many times.”

I stood up preparing for my leave.

“You told me she admired how I allowed you to be raised by others instead of keeping you down here. Trust, I will continue to do that as I lost many years as is, my darling. I don’t plan on missing out anymore. Please give me one chance to prove I am fighting for you?”

Everything was telling me it was the wrong choice, but she is my mother and I need to trust she has my best interests in heart.

“You’re going to go back, and you’re going to tell him you are with child. Ryleigh, you don’t understand what having a child means to Hades. He also knew it wasn’t his because I couldn’t give him one. Zeus made it to where he could procreate so it’s a miracle. But he also knows that you won’t have any prenatal care and will make trips outside of hell in order to fetch supplies. I’ve been complacent with where I am at that I don’t even both try to leave. When there is an opening, I can get to it. I will help. But promise you won’t come back here. I will find you.”

I just nodded. I trusted she wouldn’t let me down but giving Hades a kid? Would he be mad at me? I mean this time it was his. She had her hands on the side of my cheeks like she was trying to get me to understand clearly. I was scared. Holy shit, I was scared. I was putting my trust in someone I had never met before.

“It makes sense now why he wanted to be with me of all people. It’s because I look like you, and why he made me change my hair. He wanted to replace you and decided if he couldn’t have you then he would go for your daughter. When I went to hell it was no coincidence why he was so nice to me. He knew all along who I was and kept you a secret.”

My self-esteem had dropped. Everything just never seems to ever play in my favor. It dawned on me.

“I am never anyone’s first choice.”

I didn’t know I said that out loud, but I did, and I hated myself knowing I wasn’t good enough. I walked out without turning back and I realized I was naked still. The air was cold, and it was too frightening. I shifted into my wolf and darted back to the castle. At this point, I just wanted to lay in bed and cry. I used to believe that maybe it was my beauty and my personality that made people want me. Maybe even love me. But honestly, it was never that. I was the placeholder the entire time. I think once I get back, I will think about moving to another country or pack if there are any left. I was better off alone. But I hated being alone… A part of me enjoyed the attention I was getting, and I held onto it for so long until they disappointed me. I got changed into some clothes and laid in bed just crying to myself. I just wanted to be wanted. The door opened and it was Hades.

“Baby what’s wrong?”

He came over and pulled me on his lap and I took advantage of his comfort. I don’t doubt that he loves me, but I can’t be with a man who did this to me.

“Something bad happened. It’s just going to ruin everything, and I am stressed out.”

But here I was venting again. He wasn’t bad to me other than that one time and he cared but I didn’t love him.

“Hey don’t say that. What happened? Tell me please.”

I let out a sigh and knew that this moment could change everything. I stayed wrapped in his arms. I didn’t want to tell him, but Persephone said too. My trust issues run too deep.

“You’re worrying me, please tell me.”

So here it was. The start of more drama I wasn’t prepared for.

“I’m pregnant.”

And with that everything stopped. The sudden shock radiated off him and I didn’t know how he’d react.

“How do you know that you’re pregnant? He asked.

I got off the bed in front of him and pulled my shirt up for him. His cheek was against my stomach.