Chapter 109: The Ones Behind Him

Elias

Cold air struck my face as I stepped outside.

I crossed Asha’s narrow garden and sat on the low stone wall beside the lane. A man farther downhill was repairing a cartwheel, striking the axle with a mallet in a steady rhythm. I counted the blows because counting them was easier than counting my breaths.

My hands were still trembling.

I pressed them flat against my thighs and drew in air slowly.

Four counts in.

Hold.

Four out.

Again.

The first few breaths did little. My chest stayed tight, and every part of me wanted to move, to find a horse, turn south and do something simply because sitting here felt unbearable.

But there was nothing useful to do.

Going back would not undo what had happened. It would only give the Triune another weapon.

The mallet struck again.

By the time the cottage door opened behind me, my breathing had begun to settle.

Footsteps crossed the garden.

Slow ones.

I straightened before Lyanna reached the wall and moved aside to make room for her.

She lowered herself carefully, one hand braced against the stone and the other beneath her stomach. When her balance shifted, I caught her elbow.

“Thank you.”

I nodded.

She settled beside me without asking whether I was all right.

I was grateful.

A dog barked somewhere behind the houses. The man down the lane continued working on his cart. Wind stirred the bundles of drying herbs beneath Asha’s eaves.

After a while, Lyanna spoke.

“Serena is your sister?”

I looked at her.

“Yes.”

“And your father?”

“Darian.”

She nodded.

Those were the first things she knew about either of them. Until today, she had not even known their names.

“Serena is twenty,” I said.

Lyanna turned slightly toward me.

“She lives with my father at the estate.”

“Are you close?”

“Yes.”

The answer required no thought.

“What is she like?”

I looked toward the lane.

“She has an opinion about everything, usually before anyone has asked for one. She is stubborn, impatient and has been convinced since childhood that rules are suggestions made by people without sufficient imagination.”

The corner of Lyanna’s mouth moved.

“That sounds difficult.”

“It is.”

“You sound fond of her.”

I rubbed my thumb across my palm.

“She is my favourite person.”

Lyanna’s expression softened.

I looked away.

“I didn't say goodbye properly.”

I had left the estate believing I would return. There should have been another dinner, another argument in a corridor, another morning when Serena appeared at the stables because apparently whatever I was doing was more interesting than whatever she had been told to do.

Instead, everything after that had carried me farther from home.

“She knew you were unhappy?” Lyanna asked.

“Yes. She knew what I thought of the Triune and what we were doing to the Aelorians.”

“But she didn't know what you planned.”

“I didn't plan any of this.”

Lyanna was quiet.

“I made sure no one knew where I went,” I said. “I thought that would be enough.”

She looked down at her hands.

“It should have been.”

“Not with them.”

“No.”

The simple agreement helped more than reassurance would have.

I leaned forward and looked toward the mountains beyond the rooftops.

The urge to move had not gone away. Every instinct I possessed insisted that sitting on a wall while my family remained hundreds of miles away was intolerable.

“I keep thinking I should do something.”

Lyanna turned toward me.

“What?”

I let out a humourless breath.

“That is the difficulty.”

I had been through the possibilities already. Going south would accomplish nothing. Sending word risked giving the Triune the evidence they had been searching for, and contacting anyone close to the family could put them under suspicion too.

There were plenty of things I could do.

None of them would help Serena.

“My father did what he had to do,” I said.

Lyanna waited.

“I know that.”

Knowing it did not erase the sound of Asha telling me he had condemned me before the council, but I could live with the words themselves.

“He protected your sister.”

“Yes.”

Whatever my father had said about me, Serena had come home afterward.

That was what mattered.

Anything beyond that belonged to the two months Asha could not account for.

I drew a slow breath.

This one came easily.

“I hate not knowing.”

“I know.”

Lyanna’s hand settled over mine.

I looked down at it before turning my palm beneath hers and closing my fingers around her hand.

For a while, neither of us spoke.

The pressure in my chest had not disappeared, but it no longer felt as though I needed to tear myself in half simply to move in two directions at once.

I could not reach Serena today.

That did not mean I would never reach her.

The distinction was small.

For now, it was enough.

The cottage door opened.

Asha stood beneath the eaves. Her attention went first to me, then to our joined hands before settling on Lyanna.

“How far along are you?”

Lyanna turned toward her.

“Nearly seven months.”

Asha went still.

Her gaze dropped to Lyanna’s stomach before moving toward the mare tied beyond the wall.

“You've been riding.”

“When I need to.”

“Through the mountains?”

“Yes.”

Asha inhaled slowly.

I knew that expression.

“Asha.”

She raised one finger without looking at me.

“Not you.”

I closed my mouth.

Her attention remained on Lyanna.

“How often are you getting breathless?”

“Mostly when we're climbing.”

“Back pain?”

“Yes.”

“Cramping?”

“Occasionally. It passes when I rest.”

My head turned.

Lyanna looked at me.

“What?”

“You didn't mention cramping.”

“Because it passes when I rest.”

Asha’s gaze moved between us.

“How long does it last?”

“Not long.”

“Bleeding?”

“No.”

Some tension left my shoulders.

Asha noticed but spared me the comment.

“Swelling?”

“A little.”

“Where?”

“My feet, mostly by evening.”

Asha stepped closer.

“When was the last time a healer examined you?”

Lyanna hesitated.

That was answer enough.

Asha closed her eyes briefly.

When she opened them, she pointed toward the cottage.

“Inside.”

Lyanna shifted forward and braced one hand against the wall.

I stood and offered my forearm.

She used it to pull herself upright, then remained still for a moment with one hand beneath her stomach.

Asha watched her closely.

“How long has standing been uncomfortable?”

“It isn't always uncomfortable.”

“That wasn't what I asked.”

Lyanna gave her a look.

Asha waited.

“A few weeks.”

“And you've been travelling the entire time?”

“Yes.”

Asha glanced at me as though this were somehow entirely my doing.

“She is very difficult to stop.”

“I am standing here,” Lyanna said.

“I know.”

Asha stepped aside and opened the cottage door.

“Inside before either of you gives me another reason to be concerned.”

Lyanna started toward her. Asha was already watching the length of her steps and the way she carried the weight of her stomach.

I followed.

“And you,” Asha said without looking back, “are going to let her answer my questions.”

“I do let her answer.”

Lyanna glanced over her shoulder at me.

I reconsidered.

“Usually.”

Asha made a quiet sound of disbelief.

I followed Lyanna into the cottage and shut the door behind us.