Chapter 27

“Ready?” Julian asked.

“I…I guess so,” Tate replied, apprehension showing in his voice.

“Hang on a minute,” Julian said. He walked over to a rack in the back of the cabana and took off two long terry robes. Thinking these might help Tate, as well as ease his own discomfort, he walked back to Tate and held one out.

“No, I’m good,” Tate said. “I might as well face the music all at once.”

Julian felt for him. He was still struggling with the notion that he was less of a man because of his leg.

Well, he’ll see how wrong he is in just a minute,Julian thought as he hung one of the robes back on the rack. Julian, however, slipped on his robe.

Julian walked back to Tate, who took a deep breath, squared his shoulders, and said, “You go first.”

Julian smiled at Tate. Julian put a hand behind the young man’s neck and pulled him close. Resting his forehead against Tate’s, he said softly, “Don’t worry. You’ll be fine.” Then, reluctantly, he led Tate out of the cabana.

As they walked onto the pool deck they were greeted with wolf whistles and catcalls. Julian again thought of his earlier assessment—with a face and body like Tate’s, no one was even going to notice his missing leg. And Julian was right. Tate was immediately swallowed up in the crowd of men that rushed in to admire him.

Julian walked a short distance away and sat at one of the tables, watching Tate nervously.

Craig appeared with drinks. “You look like you could use this,” he said, handing a glass to Julian and sitting next to him. “Don’t worry. They’ll get tired of ogling him in a while.”

It wasn’t the ogling that worried Julian, it was Tate’s response. Right now he was animatedly talking and laughing. Every now and then he would look over to where Craig and Julian sat and give them a wave.

Julian smiled and waved back. He tried not to feel threatened. After all, he and Tate weren’t a couple. He was Tate’s liberator, not his lover. Yes, they had had sex. It had been tender and sweet, more like lovemaking than sex. However, even when in the throes of that tender, sweet passion, words of love had never passed their lips.

Julian had set Tate free. And this was the result. Julian had no right to expect that emancipating Tate from his self-imposed bondage of guilt and shame gave him the inside track to a relationship with the young man.

However, as he watched Tate interacting with the men at the party, Julian realized at some level he did want what they had shared to be the basis of a relationship. He admitted to himself he did have feelings for Tate. He wondered if these feelings were strong enough to follow Tate back into the world he’d left behind in New York. Alternatively, if Tate had feelings for Julian, were they deep enough to dissuade him from entering that world, if such a life appealed to him? Either way, just contemplating that kind of conflict between them made Julian uncomfortable.

Craig had been right, the group of men surrounding Tate was thinning. The novelty of the young man was apparently waning.

Most of the men at the party were Julian’s age, give or take a few years. They were approaching middle-age, some already having arrived there. Many had given up their battle with diet and exercise, and let the predictable middle-age spread take over. Some, however, whether for health reasons or stereotypical gay vanity, or both, had kept up the pursuit of youthful virility. It was mainly these men that now still sat at court with the former Marine, laughing, joking, and drinking.

As the evening wore on, the inevitable began to happen. The general atmosphere of sexual tension, enhanced by the alcohol and pot, escalated to the separating of pairs or threesomes. Some disappeared into the house or the cabanas. Others were bold enough—or intoxicated enough—to peel off their swimsuits to engage in sex in the pool or on its deck.

Craig, who was as drunk as any of them, had been coming on to Julian for the last half hour. He suggested that since Julian’s boyfriend was busy, the two of them could find a way to pass the time.

Tate was in the pool, roughhousing with a couple of the younger men. As Julian fended Craig off, he saw Tate and another man facing each other. They were apparently having words. Alarmed, Julian stood up. The man laughed and disappeared below the surface of the water.

Tate reached down, pulled him up, and then shoved him away. Julian heard Tate loudly say, “No means no!”

Tate swam to the side of the pool and hauled himself out onto the deck. Julian pushed Craig away. Craig had also risen and was hanging on Julian, attempting to kiss him. Julian went to Tate, who was getting up to stand on one leg.