Avrora
I'm pregnant. Me.
No wonder I've been throwing up and I can barely keep water down. That was the only clue, and it suddenly emerged over the last few days.
I'm pregnant. There's a baby inside me.
I feel bad for being in shock, and I feel bad for not feeling happier. Then I start to freak. Anatoli said he didn't want kids. But that was before. When... when he hated me. He doesn't hate me now, but how do I tell him?
Will he be happy or mad at me for being careless?
"Avrora," Jayce calls from the car parked paces away from me on the driveway. I don't even remember he was waiting for me, or seeing him. "Are you okay?"
"Yes. Sorry." I make my way toward him, and he opens the door for me to get inside the car.
"You look pale. Are you sure you should be going anywhere?"
"Yes. I'm fine." I'm not fine. I feel like I'm going to throw up again, and I'm sure that will be because of nerves.
"Okay. Just checking. The boss will have my head if I take his wife out when she's sick."
"Don't worry. You won't get in trouble." I give him a smile and get in the car.
He closes the door, and minutes later, we're driving off the property.
I get lost in my thoughts, feeling sicker than sick the closer I get to Mira's house.
Two hours later, we've arrived, and Jayce leaves.
Shaky legs carry me inside the house when the butler opens the door, and I'm led to the sunroom, where Mira sits looking like a shell.
She smiles for me, but her eyes are red, and she has that emaciated look again like when Evgeni first got sick. Only God must know what she's going through.
I hug her when she stands, feeling glad I came.
"I'm so sorry, Mira. I'm so very sorry."
She dabs away tears when we pull apart. "Thank you for coming to see me. I appreciate it in light of all you've gone through."
"I had to see you. Just to see how you are. I know you can't be okay, but I still had to come and see for myself."
She motions for me to sit. I do, and she sits next to me. "I have to be strong. I knew this was coming. Part of me prepared. Part of me didn't want to let him go."
"I don't think you could ever be prepared for death," I reason, giving her hand a gentle squeeze.
"No. You can't. It's been awful not having him here, but at least I could see him at the hospital. Now I'll never see him again and I have to make arrangements for... the funeral."
"If I can help with anything, please let me know."
"That's really sweet of you. How are you doing?"
"Not so great." That's the truth, and with another bomb about being pregnant falling in my lap, I still feel tense.
"I'm still in shock, Avrora. When Anatoli told me what happened, it felt unreal, like he was talking about somebody else. But I feel like I should have known. Your father is truly despicable. Truly."
I nod, holding back tears. "I know. Do you feel differently about me?" I'm interested to know because things will be different now in ways I might not know yet.
For a start, the Butyrskayas were Knights. Things will be different just on the basis of that.
"In what ways, dear?"
"Because I'm not the real Avrora." When I say it like that, it feels weird. I've decided to keep my name because I've gone by Avrora for too many years to change it. In my heart though, I know I'm Mischa Butyrskaya. "I'm not the girl you spoke so fondly off, who wanted your wedding veil."
Sadness enters her eyes. "I don't feel any differently about you. I will always love you no matter who you are. But my heart aches when I think of what must have happened to the real Avrora. Your father hasn't been found yet, and knowing him, I doubt he'll be cooperative in telling anybody anything."
"No, I don't think he will be."
"Did you remember everything?"
"Just the incident itself and what Uther did." Saying his name like that feels better, but it still hurts. "At least I remembered how the accident happened. A man chased me through the woods, and I ran into the road."
"Did you see what he looked like?"
"No."
"My God. This is terrible. How are you feeling otherwise?"
How am I feeling?
Shaken, terrified, freaked out because I'm about to become a mother and I don't know the first thing about being one.
A wave of nausea hits me, and I place a hand to my stomach.
"Avrora." Mira rests her hand on mine. "You look like you're going to fall off the chair."
I should tell her what's going on with me. Or, rather, inside me. If ever I needed to speak to anyone I trust urgently, it's now. Mira is probably the best person because she'll know what to do to calm me down.
"I... just got told on the way here that I'm pregnant."
Mira's eyes widen. "Oh, my goodness."
"It's sudden. And... I don't know what to make of it."
Her face hardens and she straightens, moving her hand away from mine. "Well, that's such a shame. I was hoping you would have closed your legs to that filthy animal. But now you're having his offspring."
At first, I think I misheard her or imagined what she said, but her stony glare confirms I didn't.
"What, Mira?" I ask the question anyway because I've never heard her talk that way.
"I think you heard me perfectly. I never thought of you as a whore, but maybe I expected too much when it came to my husband's bastard son."
My mouth drops and something eerie races over my skin. "Why are you talking to me like this? I'm not a whore."
"I beg to differ. You were probably in that monster's bed days after you were supposed to marry my son."
My chest tightens and I can't deny the accusation because I was. I just don't know why she's talking to me like this now.
"Mira..."
"It's okay, dear. My plans haven't changed, and you just walked right into my trap."
"What are you talking about? I don't understand. What's going on, Mira?"
Her face changes, morphing into someone I don't recognize. "I've always known you weren't the real Avrora."
I stand, sucking in a sharp breath that stings my lungs. "How did you know?"
"Because the whole thing was my idea."
What the hell is she saying to me?
"What was your idea?"
"To kill your parents and take you."
Stars speckle my vision, and I back away. "No, it can't be. No. You did that to me?"
"Yes. As it stands now, it doesn't matter who you are. Mischa or Avrora. Uther legally adopted you as a precautionary measure, so you are still his heir and I still get what I want."
"What do you want?"
"The oil company," comes a voice from behind me.
I whirl around and come face to face with Mikhail, who catches my wrists.
He smiles, baring his teeth.
"Mikhail..."
"Yes, baby. You won't get away from me this time."
"This time?"
"It was me who chased you through the woods."
More shock grips me, and I don't know how my head hasn't exploded yet.
"You?"
"It was me. Of course, I didn't mean for you to get hit by a car. But it was convenient that you forgot. Until now."
"You bastard." I look from him to Mira, and my stomach twists like someone rammed a wrench inside me and churned up my guts. "You're both evil."
"I suppose we are." His grip tightens around my wrists. "I told you I was going to get you back. And look at you here in my arms. You won't be keeping that baby, though."
"No, let me go!" I pull hard, trying to break free of his grasp, but he yanks me to him, and I crash into his chest.
"Never. I meant it when I said I loved you. You are mine now, Avrora. You will never see my brother again."
"No."
He presses a finger to my throat, pushes into the pressure point there, and in seconds, blackness fills my vision.
My last thought is of Anatoli.
And our baby.