Chapter 43 — Please Don’t Go

"You're really leaving next weekend?"

"Probably. Dad really thinks Cali's gonna be the biggest hotspot soon. Mom wants me home badly, before the travel restrictions get worse."

"Yeah. I get it," mumbled the guy beside her after a stretch of silence. "They're just worried."

"Sorry." Jessi glanced at his face. The faint lights coming from the other side of the street helped her see a bit more clearly now.

"Well, your choice..." Jenson sighed with a weak shrug. "It's not like I could keep you here."

The dispirited tone in his deep voice wedged a knifelike pain into her chest, nagging at her conscience like the previous nights. She bit on her lip and sat still, with him sitting close to her in the backseat of his truck.

Their clothes touched when he reclined. His muscular forearms rested on his thighs. The partial darkness gave her a hard time gauging his emotional state, but she could feel the tension between them settling in.

Small creases formed between his brows as his lips pouted. Jenson had taken off his face mask barely a minute ago, revealing the days-old stubble that partly hid the angles of his clenched jaw.

What did he really want to talk about? Her resignation? Again? Or perhaps he needed her to sign an NDA or something. Did he really have to invite her to the party?

"You been drinking?"

"Just a glass of wine."

Drinking by himself alone at home or with Charm? Jessi made a face.

Strange. He didn't like wine. Why would he be drinking this early? He still spoke clearly, though. His warm breath didn't reek of alcohol yet. No slurred speech or any other telltale signs, too.

"Where?"

Maybe he was just boozing the jet lag away? They just got back from Canada after he and the cast had to shoot a teaser for the next season. Maybe he thought wine would help with the headache. "At the bar. With the guys." Jenson sighed, his tone flat and almost too bored.

"Oh."

As he leaned closer to her, their thighs touched. His hand almost landed on her wrist after he briefly massaged his forehead.

"But you don't drink wine."

"Here." He shifted in his seat to grab something from a paper bag beside him. Then he handed her a transparent bottle of pills. Not bigger than a glass of water, but full to the brim.

"What's this?" She used her phone's flashlight to check the contents. Lavender-colored pills. Familiar shape. Oh...his vitamins.

"Take half a dose before going to bed, at least thrice a week. If you feel some side effects, make it once a week."

"Wait." She frowned at the bottle. "But that's yours."

He placed the bottle on her thigh. "It's gonna keep you from getting real sick if ever you get infected again."

"Okay. Thanks."

He gave her a feeble nod in reply. Then they both fell silent.

It just made her imagination race. Being this close to him while they sat alone in the dark just overwhelmed her with thoughts she shouldn't be entertaining right now. Shit. She just hoped he hadn't noticed that it was more than a little crush at this point.

He didn't need to know. He already had a lot on his plate to keep him busy—he didn't need to know the issues she'd been dealing with lately. It would only cause friction between them.

The last thing she wanted? Damaging their year-old sincere friendship just because she couldn't keep her stupid girlish feelings to herself.

"Did you mean it?"

"What?" she murmured, staring back at him in the dimness.

"That you'll come back here if things settle down, and if the new guy doesn't last long."

"Why would I lie to you?" Jessi gripped the pill bottle when he leaned in. Now her face was inches away from his.

His warm breaths fanned her cheek as he regarded her with an unwavering stare. "I didn't wanna let you go this soon, just to be clear."

Her breath caught in her tightening throat. What he said just left her thoughts in disarray, ridding her of the ability to come up with a coherent response.

"I still don't want you to go."

"Jenson..."

He exhaled a noisy sigh, then rested the side of his head on her shoulders, catching her off-guard again. "Just makin' sure nothing's gonna change between us after you leave."

Nothing's gonna change? What did he mean?

To some degree, he still seemed upset by her decision, and he was probably just holding back his real emotions. But perhaps it was just the drastic change that bothered him a lot. "I just feel like I did something wrong."

"No. No." She sighed. Her chest ached at his words. The gloom and loneliness in his mellow voice just squeezed her heart. Now she felt like her choice to leave just depressed him and stressed him out further. "You didn't."

"Really hope so."

"You didn't. I just...need to be with my parents right now. They're getting old, y'know." She placed her left arm over his chest to hug him lightly.

"I know. I respect your decision. But I want you to come back." Jenson stroked the back of her hand that rested on his shoulder. "If you can't find a good job there, just give me a call." He gently kissed her wrist and held her forearm to keep it on his warm chest.

For a moment, they just sat in silence while her thoughts struggled to calm down. She couldn't breathe properly anymore. She loved the intimacy they shared right now, though. It surprised her since he never seemed like the type who wore his heart on his sleeve. "Thanks for everything." She gave his arm a squeeze before pulling away.

"Stop it." He frowned and rubbed his unshaven jaw with his palm. "You're talkin' like you'll be gone in the morning."

She snickered. "Maybe. Maybe not..."

"Not funny." He scoffed and sat up.

"So stop acting like you're gonna miss me a lot."

"You're being weird." He kept frowning. Then he suddenly leaned over to hug her.

She stiffened and shut her mouth. It was a real embrace, his arms wrapped tight around her back while his chin rested on her shoulder. Now her eyes were getting hot and teary, and her entire face felt like he just lit her up on fire.

Oh crap. What was he doing to her? He was just making her feelings worse. Her stupid, unrequited feelings that just wouldn't quit...

But then again, she didn't have it in her to tell him a part of her wanted more than a close friendship with him. She couldn't. She shouldn't.

He was a committed man...and he wasn't the type of person who was okay with infidelity. "Come with me to the party," he murmured to her ear before letting go of her. "Gotta unwind sometimes."

"Okay, but I gotta change first. Put on some foundation at least."

"Why? You look fine."

"Hardly." She pulled a face to match his scowl. "I look like I just got out of bed."

"Fine. I'll wait here."

"No. I'm gonna need half an hour at least. Go. I'll just take a cab."

"I'll wait. Don't be stubborn." He reclined again, ignoring her serious stare.

"You're the one being stubborn."

"Go. I'll wait here."

Jessi shook her head and stifled a smile. Actually she wanted to tell him he shouldn't step out or go inside her apartment building because someone might recognize him.

He would be hounded by paparazzi out here if someone posted a photo of him online, being out in public again. At this point, she wouldn't even be surprised if a malicious tabloid article published a photo of him hugging and kissing her outside that hospital. Bunch of sellouts.

"I'm fine. I'll wait." He smirked and looked away while he held his phone on his lap.

"Don't follow me."