Chapter 18

*Livie*

The Wilson family home was buzzing with elation. Everyone chatted excitedly about our surprise nuptials, and expressed their joy at James finally finding his happiness. Feeling overwhelmed, I slipped into the kitchen to catch my breath. I busied myself cleaning up the champagne glasses and throwing out the spent bottles. Mrs. Wilson was feeling stronger and more able to move around, so she suggested we all go out for a celebratory dinner. Chris called in a favor and got us a table at Mr. Wilson’s favorite restaurant. It was the best way we could think to include him in the celebration.

Once I finished cleaning the stemware, I stood over the kitchen sink, as I had done many times before, with my eyes closed as I tried to steady myself. The sound of someone shuffling into the kitchen startled me, and I jumped and turned to find Mrs. Wilson. “Oh let me help you!” I squealed, and scurried over to help her into a chair and the breakfast table.

“I’m ok! I’m finally getting around better.” She said smiling at me like only a mother can. “How are you doing?” She asked, the concern not masked at all.

“I’m ok.” I nodded my head, not sure if I was trying to convince her or me. “I’m happy.” The crack in my voice betrayed my rollercoaster of emotions as I blinked back tears. “I’m so sorry. I am happy. I do love him so much.”

“Have you told Nancy?” Oh how I longed to have a mother like this. I shook my head.

“I want to enjoy it, before Nick knows.” The tissue I grabbed to blot the tears away knotted in my hand. “I miss her so much, though. She has her issues, but she’s my mom and I love her. I haven’t seen her since the fundraiser. Who knows what Nick has been telling her.”

Mrs. Wilson reached over and patted my hand. “She loves you, too, sweetheart. And I know she’s so proud of you. Nick is a difficult man, as you know, and its been hard.” She was silent for a moment, then continued. “Thank you for my loving my son the way you. Thank you for being stronger than Nick. I am so proud to have you officially in our family and I know Elliot would be too!”

I stood from my chair, and helped her up also, then wrapped my arms around my now mother-in-law. “Everything ok in here?” Opening my eyes, I found James standing in the doorway.

“Yes, I was just visiting with my newest daughter-in-law, thank you.” Mrs. Wilson looked at her son with such love and admiration in her expression. “Let’s go celebrate!”

The Wilson clan arrived at George’s and were immediately seated at a large round table that looked like it was cut from one solid tree. It was a deep cherry redwood, and was the perfect setup for our family. James started to pull out a chair for his mom, but Travis jumped in. “You’ve got your own woman, hands off mine!” Mrs. Wilson giggled, and swatted Travis’s arm. Once we were all settled, Noah ordered another two bottles of champagne for the table.

Glasses filled, he stood up “I would like to make a toast.” We all looked at him as he continued. “James, I will never be able to put in to words how much you mean to me. You never hesitated to step in and be the man we could all look up to when we lost dad. You put our needs above your own grief, your own dreams. You changed all your plans to be there for us. No one deserves to be loved and adored more than you, brother. Livie, you’ve always been a Wilson and I am so grateful to have you love James the way he loves the people around him. Here’s to a long and very happy marriage!” The tears were flowing again as everyone clinked glasses and shouted “hear, hear!” James turned his head to face me, and mouthed “I love you.” I returned in kind, but, as in so many things, the moment didn’t last.

“Well I suppose congratulations are in order?” The table fell silent as we all looked to wear the voice came from. I locked eyes with my father, but movement behind him pulled my attention.

“Mom.” Spoken barely above a whisper, I quickly pushed my chair back and stood up. James followed suit, took my hand, and tucked it into the crook of his arm. We walked side by side around the table to greet my parents.

“Nick.” James nodded curtly. “Nancy, it’s lovely to see you.” He freed my hand to greet my mother, who accepted a kiss on the cheek before turning her attention back to me. She seized my hands, pulling them both up to her line of sight. Holding them in her vice-like grip, she said to Nick, “You congratulate the groom, and give best wishes the bride.” Her emotionless face turned back to me, “Are you happy?” I nodded, unable to form words. “Very well then. James, congratulations. Nick, lets go.”

She released my hands, and I clasped them together at once, drawing them towards my sternum. Nick gripped James’s hand, and pulled him close, whispering something in his ear, and dropping his arm back to his side just as abruptly. I’m not sure how long we stood in place after their dramatic exit. Beth and Trav flanked James and me ushering us back into our chairs.

Mrs. Wilson, with the assistance of her youngest son, stood. “I would also like to make a toast.” Still flabbergasted by the cold exchange with my parents, I held my glass up but was very disconnected from the moment. “Olivia.” Hearing my name helped to jolt me back to the present, and I tilted my head up to meet Mrs.Wilson’s gaze. “Sweetheart, I have always considered you to be like my own daughter, and now you are. I have watched you grow up and overcome more than most children, and endure circumstances that no one should. You are a beautiful, strong soul and I am so proud to call you my daughter. I know that you will love my son, because I’ve watched you love my family for nearly twenty years. I pray you have all the happiness that Elliot and I did. Congratulations both of you.” James’s lips pressed against my temple, as I held my glass up to Mrs. Wilson.

The rest of the night was filled with laughter, more food than one could imagine and a seemingly never-ending supply of champagne. By the time our Uber driver dropped us at James’s house, our house, I was beyond exhausted. Kicking off my heels, I fell back onto the soft leather of James’s couch. “Welcome home, Mrs. Wilson.” James sat next to me, handing me a snifter of brandy and simultaneously pulling me closer to him.

“Welcome home, Mr. Wilson.” I breathed a sigh of contentment, and took a sip of the drink in my hand. The liquid warmed my throat as I swallowed it. With my head on his chest, James leaned down and pressed his lips to the top of my head. “Tired, baby?” My eyelids drooped shut, as I murmured my response. He took the glass from hand, setting it on the coffee table, then shifted his arms under me. Standing up he held me in his arms, and carried me to bed.

I awoke sometime later, wrapped up in James’s limbs. Carefully peeling him off me, I slipped out of bed and went to the restroom. The last forty-eight hours felt like dream. Gazing at the magnificent ring James gifted me with, I still couldn’t believe I was married. Married to my childhood crush. The man I dreamed about and drooled over for years. He chose me. When I crawled back in bed, I was giddy. Drunk on the unfathomable direction my life had taken.

As if magnets, drawn to one another, his arms and legs found me in his sleep, and I was wound up in his embrace once again. I allowed myself to watch him sleep. I told myself to soak up every moment of this joy, because I knew it wouldn’t last. It never does.

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*I shoved down the all consuming urge to vomit when I felt his hand slip into my waistband. I still hurt from the last time. I tried so hard to fight him off, but he was right. He always wins. I retreated behind the wall I’d built in my mind. If I couldn’t stop him, I’d at least try to block it out. Pretend I wasn’t here. Pretend I was safe. And pray morning came soon.*