Chapter 59: The Western Woods

Beatris

Sitting across from Alexander, I could still feel the warmth of his lips against mine whenever my thoughts wandered for too long.

It irritated me. I had kissed him because I needed him to trust me. Nothing more. At least, that was what I kept telling myself.

Breakfast had long since gone cold between us, but neither of us seemed in any hurry to leave. Alexander had returned to his tea while I picked absently at the fruit on my plate.

My gaze drifted beyond the terrace.

The estate stretched endlessly before us, rose gardens, the lake, the conservatory, the stables, the orchards. Every beautiful corner Alexander had proudly shown me over the past week.

Yet something still felt unfinished.

I looked back at him.

"It still feels like I haven't seen all of Crimson Hill."

His hand paused around his teacup.

"You've seen enough."

"Enough isn't all."

His gaze lifted to mine.

"What makes you think there's more?"

I gave a faint smile. "Because every time I think I've seen everything, I discover another hidden corridor. Another staircase. Another garden."

I rested my chin lightly against my hand.

"I don't think you've shown me the entire estate."

He watched me for a long moment.

Then the corner of his mouth curved.

"I haven't."

I blinked. "You admit it?"

"There are parts of Crimson Hill that are not meant to be explored."

"Why?"

"They're dangerous."

A quiet laugh escaped me, thin and tired. "There it is again."

His brows drew together. "What?"

"'Dangerous.'" I set my fork down. "Everything I ask about somehow becomes dangerous."

His expression remained calm. "Because some things are."

I leaned back in my chair.

"So I'll never get to see them?"

"Not yet."

The answer came too easily. I looked away before he could read the disappointment on my face.

"When the time is right," he said, "you'll be free to wander wherever you want."

I almost laughed. Everything with him depended on the right time. The right moment. The right answer. The right secret. I was growing tired of waiting.

Alexander pushed his chair back and stood.

"I should be leaving."

I looked up sharply. "So soon?"

"There are matters that require my attention."

Something clicked into place at once.

"In town?"

He paused. Only for a second. Then he nodded. "Yes."

Hope surged through me before I could stop it.

"So I can come with you."

His expression changed. Not cold or angry. Just firm.

"I can't take you today."

My smile faltered.

"You told me I could come the next time you went."

"I know."

"You promised."

"I'm sorry."

His voice had gone gentler now, and I hated that it only made it worse.

"This is important."

"I won't be in the way."

He said nothing.

"I don't need you beside me the whole time."

Still nothing. I felt heat rise into my face.

"The people here worship you," I said, the bitterness slipping out before I could stop it. "If I tried to run, they'd probably tie me up themselves and deliver me back to you."

"No, Beatris."

His voice cut through mine so sharply that everything on the terrace stopped. A maid carrying a silver tray halted mid step.

Below us, a servant working among the roses looked up. The silence that followed felt enormous.

Alexander seemed to realize it at the same moment I did. Something in his expression tightened, then eased again.

When he spoke, his voice was softer, but no less firm.

"You don't understand."

I stared at him. Then I laughed. Not because anything was funny. Because I was tired.

Tired of the careful answers. Tired of the waiting. Tired of being spoken to as if patience could turn a cage into kindness.

"It's always something, isn't it?" I said. "It's dangerous. It's too soon. I'll understand later."

My chest tightened.

"You're never going to let me leave Crimson Hill."

His eyes searched mine.

"You will."

"No." I shook my head. "Not unless I become exactly what you want."

Something in his face shifted. I went on before I could lose the nerve.

"Even if I never remember fully, even if I'm still myself, you would still keep me here."

"Beatris…"

"You keep saying you're protecting me." My voice thinned despite my effort to steady it. "But all you've really done..."

It cracked there. I hated that it did.

"...is lock me inside a prettier prison."

The hurt on his face came and went so quickly I almost missed it. I hated that part of me noticed at all. I turned before he could answer.

"Beatris."

I kept walking.

"Beatris."

I didn't stop.

A small, foolish part of me hoped he’ll call me back. Tell me to come with him. Tell me he has changed your mind. Nothing came.

Only the wind moving through the ivy and the quiet clink of china behind me. By the time I reached the entrance hall, whatever hope I had left was already dead.

Fine.

If Alexander refused to take me beyond Crimson Hill, then I would search the parts of it he refused to show me.

If there were answers anywhere, they were in the western woods.

And I would sooner die trying to find them than spend the rest of my life waiting for his permission. I slowed as I entered the west wing.

Two maids were dusting the corridor ahead. Another emerged from a side room carrying fresh linens. If they saw where I was going, they would stop me.

Or worse. Tell Alexander. I waited until one disappeared down the staircase before slipping behind a row of towering marble columns. From there, I crossed into an older corridor I had discovered days earlier while wandering the mansion.

It was quieter there.

Dust clung to the corners. The portraits had grown fewer. Even the air felt colder. I followed the corridor until it emptied onto a narrow stone path behind the mansion.

No one called after me. Relief loosened something in my chest. I kept going. Past the last flower beds. Past the abandoned greenhouse. Past the weathered stone wall Catherine had mentioned.

The trees grew thicker. The path narrowed. My heartbeat quickened with every step.

This was it. At last, I had found the entrance to the western woods.

Then I stopped.

Four men stood across the path. Not gardeners. Not ordinary servants. Tall. Broad-shouldered. Dressed unlike any I had seen elsewhere in the estate.

They stood there, blocking the narrow trail that disappeared into the forest beyond.

My excitement fell away all at once, replaced by something colder. Catherine had been right.

Alexander had not merely forbidden this place.

He had stationed guards to make certain no one ever reached it.