CHAPTER FIFTY-TWO

SHONDRA:

Six years ago…

Axel left in a flurry of blue suit and shiny black shoes. I hopped out of bed, took a shower, slapped on some makeup and forty-five minutes later, I was ready, just in time to answer the door. The driver of the car Axel hired stood at the threshold. A reserved older man with fading blond hair, he greeted me perfunctory with an impassive face, his black coat lifting at the corners in the increasing wind.

"Best hurry, miss. It will rain soon." So focused was I on his slight English accent, I didn't register that I had company in the back seat.

"Hello, Shondra Williams. It's damn good to see you again."

Rain came down from the flat gray sky. Fat drops of water that resembled heartbreak tears The driver made an impatient sound in his throat. 

"Get in, Shondra. You are getting wetter by the second, and I'm sure you wouldn't want to meet Mr. Hammerstein looking ragged, would you?"

The inclement weather pushed me forward and as I fell into the seat beside him, I finally remembered his name.

William. William Rodgers.

"Get in, Shondra. Mr. Hammerstein would like to meet you," William said with a perfunctory smile.

As William gazed at me, I could only stare back at him with my mouth ajar.

He broke the silence when we entered the expressway, headed towards the Potomac, "You saw me at Axel's graduation, didn't you?"

I nodded, still unable to speak.

"Yes, those pretty green eyes see a lot, I bet," he said more to himself than to me. When he continued, his voice was stronger. "We were there, Mr. Hammerstein and I, watching the golden boy achieve another crowning moment.

The pique in Gilliam's voice scared me, but curiosity prompted me to ask, "Do you work for Axel's father?"

Gilliam's eyes glazed over before he turned his head. I didn't need to see the bitterness on his face as it was clear in his voice.

"I do as a matter of fact." He plucked at his pant leg, adjusting it over his knee so the material fell in a smooth line. "Some people don't get everything handed to them. Some people have to work for what they want."

I let out a derisive sound. "Do you mean Axel? Because I know for a fact, he's not like that. He works hard at—"

"Hard at fucking whatever he can and ruining dishwater's decent. Yes, I know all about Axel." William let out a laugh so scathing, the driver glanced at him in the rear-view mirror.

I silently seethed at the slander against my man while William rolled up the divider to keep our conversation private. Once shut, he spoke again, tearing at my confidence with his words.

"You've probably only seen the good side of him, Shondra." He placed a warm hand on my knee, patting it once. I hated to admit it, but there was something so familiar about his touch, it disappointed me I didn't recoil.

"The stories I could tell you of how many girls he has carelessly tossed aside—"

"I don't want to hear about it!" I covered my ears like a six-year-old and closed my eyes as if that would stop his comments, shaking my head so fast my hair wiped in my face.

I didn't want to hear what might one day happen to me. No one could guarantee the future, not even Axel with his devotion to my body and his love of my mind. If Axel had made concrete plans to do something about our future, I would have laughed at William trying to feed my insecurities, but Axel hadn't.

And William used this to his advantage.

"Come on, Shondra. You must be curious about the others, right?"

I was, but he would never know. He had lost all my good faith when he'd started in on Axel.

"Just tell me one thing: what's this meeting about? Why did Axel's father send you to get me?"

Probably to tell you off for daring to date his son, was my immediate thought. 

Since Mr. Hammerstein had his baby boy's internship arranged, he probably had a girl in mind for him to marry. A woman with a pedigree finer than mine could ever hope to be. Like stays with like, was the saying, and I was as far removed from the likeness of Axel and his ilk as I could get.

William grinned as he watched the demons take hold and brasserie the trust Axel had built up within me.

"Mr. Hammerstein wants to meet the Lilia darling that's so special to his son. Since we'd made contact before, he sent me in his stead." He shrugged, a nice lifting of lean shoulders. "Mr. Hammerstein thought it best to meet you on neutral territory rather than using his key to the house… and break up you two fucking."

I bristled at his language. Only Axel could use that word around me, as when he said it made me hotter than the fires of hell. I refused to tolerate it from anyone else, and I didn't hesitate to let the errand boy know.

"You don't have to be so crass, William."

This time his laugh was full of sinister glee.

"You want to talk about crass? Your boyfriend is crass. Did you know he got a girl pregnant? And when she told him about the baby, he laughed in her face and said it couldn't possibly be his? He outed her in front of all his friends in the common room at Harvard, flat out refusing to have anything to do with her or the baby."

"Stop it, William, just stop it. Axel would have told me—"

He cut me off with another laugh. "Yeah, he'll probably tell you when you end up the same way. I hope you made him glove up before you two f—made love."

I ignored his sarcasm to wonder if maybe I'd dodged a bullet the first time Axel and I were together, only to get caught this time.

Shit!

I forgot to take my pill again this morning.

Since I'd been in D.C. I'd forgotten to take it more than a few times. I also wasn't clear on what the doctor had advised about making up the missed pills…

Uh, oh.

Sweat pooled under my arms and my heart rate doubled.

Would Axel's promise hold true? The one to take care of the child? Or would he run like my sperm donor when Mom told him the news about me?

That thought banished the worry from my mind and allowed anger to take its place. I resented the hell out of the man who helped create me. Mom never told me anything about him, except he'd floated away on the wind when she'd told him she was pregnant.

If that piece of shit had just stuck around, maybe what happened to me when I was eight wouldn't have occurred. 

I blamed him as much as myself.

"Tell me you were careful, Shondra. I wouldn't want you see you humiliated when Axel shows his true colors."

I straightened up in my seat. I wasn't a weak bitch, crying and asking the heavens 'Why me.'

"It doesn't matter what we were. Don't believe you."

Axel had promised never to lie to me, good or bad, and I trusted in his promise.

William shrugged his shoulders and turned to the window. The car ate up the miles, and the silence stretched between us while I grew lost in my thoughts of my faith in Axel.

We arrived at the meeting place, a restaurant with a view of the river. William came around the car and opened the door. He stuck a hand out; I ignored it and stood, brushing past him like I knew where I was going. His words halted me in my tracks. 

"Look up the tragedy of Tabitha Moore when you have a chance. There's a Facebook page made by her parents. It doesn't say Axel's name specifically, it can't because they signed an NDA in order to settle, but those that know him will recognize the signs."

William passed me and led the way into the restaurant while I shambled behind, my faith in Axel, cracking at the corners.

And yeah, I was dead scared to meet his father.

Axel had spoken sparingly about him, but I knew enough from what he had told me: "If he ever contacts you, and he probably will at some point, watch what you say. He remembers everything and will use your words against you."

It seemed Axel's father was exploiting people's weaknesses. I wouldn't give him any ammunition. My plan was simple: I would say "yes" and "no" and try to look intelligent.

A smiling hostess in a black dress told us Mr. Hammerstein was waiting even before we opened our mouths. She beckoned us forward, and I glanced around as we followed her into the bowels of the restaurant. Since it was early, few people were dining. If I had come under better circumstances, I would have admired the linen tablecloths, matching napkins, and shiny silverware and the small flower arrangements. 

In short, the place oozed money.

I probably couldn't afford a glass of water in a place like this.

The hostess halted at the entrance of a private room. "Mr. Hammerstein would like you to go in when you are ready." William squeezed my arm in commiseration, whispered, "Good luck," and walked away with the peaches and cream hostess, already chatting her up.

I had to enter the lion's den alone.