Let's Call It Off

Let's Call It Off

Sam's POV

Alex grudgingly released Rowan to me, and we left the precinct together. I glanced back to see him standing at the entrance, his hands in his pockets, his face still folded in a snarl, his tight eyes following Rowan and me as we strolled down the parking lot.

I turned back before the heat in his eyes could burn me to crisps. I pulled open my car, and I dropped into the driver seat. Rowan dropped into the passenger seat after me.

He made me a grim grin with his bruised, puffy face and threw his hands behind his head, dropping back in his signature pose. “Thanks, detective.” He said. “I would have gotten out tomorrow, or earlier if the grumpy ex had let me get a call, since he had nothing to charge me with. But thanks anyway for your help.”

I paused in my move to start the car, and I looked sharply at him. I saw the twinkle in his eyes that hinted that he was teasing me. I shook my head stiffly, stifling a sad chuckle as I twisted the car key and the car whooshed to life.

I leaned back to drive, gripping the steering wheel. I pulled the gear into reverse, and I looked into the rearview mirror to guide me as I reversed and drove out of the cluster of cars on my side of the parking lot. “Where are you headed now, Rowan? Let me know so I'll know where to drop you.” I said, over the soft noise of the humming engine. I tried to keep my eyes on the road and off him. For some reason, I didn't want to see his reaction.

“Where else but your home, detective? I want to…”

“We are not going to my home, Rowan. And tonight is the last we will be seeing each other. So I ask again.” I paused for a little suspenseful effect. “Where are you headed?”

My fingers tightened on the steering wheel, and I refused to look from the road to him. I couldn't tell why, but some part of me was scared to look. Some part of me was scared to glimpse what his reaction would be as I carefully hinted to him that I wanted off of whatever existed between us.

“But De-ttec-tive,” he stuttered a bit, which was probably the first time I had ever heard him do so. He paused for a moment, then his voice resumed being smooth and careful. Still, it lacked that charm with which he usually swoons people. “I thought we had already talked and buried this subject. I thought we had already agreed I won't be leaving and we are solving this case…”

“Of the two of us, Rowan. I am the detective. So leave the detective work to me. I promise you I will find the killer that framed you for the murder of Cecilia Rosewood, and when I do, I will let you know.” I said, still keeping my eyes on the road, watching the traffic around me, as I sailed down the asphalt, resisting the urge to turn to him.

“As much as I trust your promise, Detective. I want to be involved in the process of catching the killer. And importantly, I am staying because I want to stay.”

“Why? Rowan. Why don't you just go and leave me the hell alone?” I yelled.

“You know the answer to that, Detective. I don't need to spell it out to you.” He said, still smooth and careful, and still without his charm.

“Please do, Rowan. Fucking please do.” I slapped the steering wheel with my palm as I drove, my eyes still trained unflinchingly on the road. "...because I don't seem to understand why you will have to hang around me all the time, fight my partner, buy me food, and even make an effort to cook for me. I don't seem to understand why you will randomly kiss me since we mean nothing to each other, since I don't know you, and you also don't know me, since…”

“Why not stop, park somewhere by the road, and let’s discuss this like adults, detective?” he said.

“We don't need to discuss anything, Rowan. All I need from you is to get out of my life. You are ruining everything for me. You just need to be gone from my life. I can’t have anything sexual to do with a criminal. I can't…”

The rest of my ramble died off in my throat as he suddenly leaned forward towards me. I turned and was swinging my hand to push him back from me when I realized he wasn't actually reaching for me but the steering wheel.

A wild, terrified gasp echoed from me as he grabbed the steering wheel from me. He turned us away from the busy lane. My heart leapt fast to my throat as I watched the car skid fast to the other lane. He leaned his longer leg into my side and marched down quickly but gently against my foot on the brake, and the car screeched to a wild halt on the side of the road, almost crashing into the sidewalk.

I was thrown forward, but he caught me and pulled me fast to him as he dropped back into his driver seat. “What the hell was that?” I screamed, jumping away from him.

He caught my arms again and pulled me forward to him. “That was just to get you to stop and listen to me, detective.”

“That was reckless, fucking reckless.” I screamed at him, struggling to get off. “We could have fucking died. That is one of the reasons why you have to stay away from me. You are…” The rest of the words died in my throat as he leaned forward and pressed his lips hard on mine.

He sucked hungrily on my lips, and rough, grabbing onto my lips one after another and licking them with a rough, burning passion that drove forces like electric charges down my veins. I felt like I was being electrocuted from the inside, and I moaned, hard and raw, into his mouth.

Somehow, I grasped onto a shred of logic from my thoughts muddled up by his kisses, and I pushed him off me, shoving him hard against the car door.

“For the love of God, stop doing that, Rowan. Stop manipulating that to win an argument. It just makes me hate myself more that I am fucking attracted to you.” I screamed at him, turning away from him and throwing my eyes back to the road, to the cars driving down the road, the pedestrians touring the sidewalk, and the world moving around us oblivious to us in the car.

A rustle of clothes and things filled the silence between us as he sat up on the seat. The silence festered for a moment before his voice tore it to shreds. “I don't know what has suddenly come over you, detective, but we both know I am not leaving. I…”

“Why?” I demanded, still looking away from him.

“Because I want you, detective.” He answered. It wasn't quite the answer I was expecting, and for a moment it robbed me of my response. I finally found my voice, and I said. “Well, I don't want you, Rowan. And whatever exists between us cannot work, because you are a criminal and I am a detective.”

I heard his clothes squeal against his seat, and the heat of his body drew closer to me. I dived for the door to pull it and drop down, but he beat me to it. His hands closing on him on the button to tap it open.

I had no choice but to turn to him now. The usual mischievous twinkle was lost in his eyes now. And in its place was a look I didn't recognize and which I couldn't put a name to. And for some reason, staring into his amber-hazel pair made me swallow hard and painfully as an unusual heat claimed my stomach. “Why do you always have to make things about our professions, detective? Why can't you just focus on us? Focus on the fact that we both desire each other. We both want each…”

“That's one of the problems, Rowan. This is going to go nowhere.” I said to him, forcing myself to sound firm and sure. “I doubt you even love me. I doubt you even have plans of courting me, of marrying me, of starting a future with me. This is all a game to you, one whose reward for you is my pussy.”

“No, it definitely isn't, detective.” He answered.

I cleared my throat then with another hard, forceful swallow, and I forced the words out of my lips, even though it scorched my throat. “Do you love me, Rowan? Do you even plan on loving me?” I asked.

He paused for a long, quiet moment, and then he leaned back in his seat. I had expected him to lie, expected him to say at least something that wasn't the truth, but he said it simply and curtly, looking briefly away from me. “I don't love you, and I don't plan to.”

I don't know why my heart burned at his reply, while tears stung the back of my eyes, threatening to spill. But what was I really expecting? We met barely four or five days ago, and we barely know each other. Of course he wouldn't have fallen in love with me within that short time, as I wouldn't do for him either. And I don't expect him to plan to love me, since we were two opposites that shouldn't mix, a criminal and a cop.

He turned around to me, sitting up and staring right at me. “But we don't need to make things complicated between us, detective. We can still be together, at least until we figure out the attraction between us.”

“And then what?” I demanded, my tone sharp, my eyes firm on his. “Once we figured it out, then what? You will love me, court me, and marry me. I doubt you want that.”

He tried to speak, but his lips sealed shut back. His Adam's apple bulged as he swallowed hard, avoiding my eyes a little. Silence festered between us longer. A minute later he stirred on his seat back to me, and before his lips could move and he could spew some nonsense again, I stopped him.

“Just get out of my car, Rowan. There's no future to this. So the earlier we stop it, the better for both of us. If we stopped it now before either of us gets attached, then we could save ourselves from the doom this experiment between us is sure to spiral into, and no one ends up with a heartbreak.”

“But. Detect…”

“You know I am right, Rowan. So leave, and let's forget we ever met.” I said, turning completely away from him and grabbing onto the steering wheel again. “We had some great sex and some great times together, which I will always remember, but that is all there should be to it. We can't both afford things going past that.”

He said nothing for a while, silence stretching on between us, louder than the honks and noises of traffic around us. I sighed heavily with relief when I heard the door open and close shut.

I brushed off the tears staining my eyes with the back of my hand, and I engaged gears and sent the car into the road.