Chapter 56: June’s POV
June’s POV
He didn’t believe it when those words came out of my mouth, but I was telling him just the simple truth. “There is nothing for you to study inside of me.” I reminded him again, especially given the way he was looking at me. I was confused that he hadn’t gotten me the first time.
“There is,” he said calmly. “You act strong… but you still hesitate. You say you don’t need help… but you let me step in. You push people away… but you invited me here.”
My grip tightened slightly on the table. He was already getting too much. How did he even think about all of that? Was I so easy to study?
I couldn’t let him know what he had to say, which amazed me. Maybe I should try to do something different. Something that he wouldn’t even think that I could do.
But then, let’s handle this.
I slowly looked at him again. “You’re reading too much into it.”
“No,” he shook his head slowly. “I don’t think I am.”
I knew he was never going to admit it, but that was exactly what he was doing. Getting too much knowledge about me isn’t good.
I was trying so hard to keep a low profile of myself, but then there was somebody who even wanted to be interested in every single thing that was happening in my life.
That’s just crazy.
There was silence between us again and this time it was heavier than I thought. Nobody was willing to talk, and that was how we continued with dinner.
I was just focused on eating and he was doing the same. Maybe it was because I didn’t really have anything to say anymore. But then after this, he has to go home.
I was already tired, but I didn’t want to regret inviting him to my house. It was my call and I had to deal with it.
After we had finished dinner, we stood up immediately, and then I carried the plates straight to the kitchen, dropping them into the sink.
I was thinking about a lot of things already and I just needed to do something to get my mind off what I was thinking. Just something simple to distract me completely and that’s all.
Another thing that got me really confused was that I didn’t really like the way he was looking at me. That was even the main reason why I wanted to stay in the kitchen and do the dishes immediately.
While I was just standing here, I saw his shadow from behind me and immediately I turned around.
“You don’t have to do that now,” he said with a smile on his face.
He shouldn’t be in my kitchen. Oh God, I am in trouble again, “I know,” I replied. “I want to…”
I felt him move closer.
He wasn’t just moving closer, he was moving very slowly, and it was almost like he had all the time in the world. But then, it was getting really late. He needed to go.
I couldn’t look at him, so I quickly turned around and continued with the dishes. But then, I felt his presence just behind me and he was too close.
My breath hitched slightly, but I didn’t turn.
“June,” his voice was lower now.
“What?” I asked, trying to keep my voice steady.
“You’re tense,” he mentioned the same words that I didn’t like.
It’s almost like he knew when I was uncomfortable and wouldn’t even hesitate to let me know, but then, I have to deny it no matter what so that he wouldn’t feel like he was in charge
“I’m not,” I replied almost immediately, my voice barely above a whisper.
“You are.” He insisted.
My hands stopped moving in the sink. “Lucien…”
“Look at me.” He muttered.
I shook my head slightly. “No.”
I couldn’t even look him in the eye, and now he wants to take advantage of the situation and get me to look at him directly when he knew that I was completely not comfortable.
This man is just crazy.
None of us said anything again for the next five minutes. He was completely frozen, and the same was happening to me too, but then, I felt it and touched my wrist.
It was not forceful, but I felt that he wanted to stop me from doing the dishes. Before I could even push his hand away, my body reacted immediately and it was enough to tell me that something crazy was going to happen if I didn’t send him away.
“I think it’s time for you to go home,” I said in a low voice.
He didn’t respond to me and was quiet. Completely quiet like there was nobody there anymore.
I slowly turned around to look at him and that very moment when I did it, I regretted everything.
I should have just stayed behind, I should have just stayed back and continued with what I was doing, but now I was in front of him, looking directly into his eyes.
He was closer than I had expected he would be. His eyes are just a few inches away from mine and his lips are five cm away from mine.
At this point, my back was against the counter now and there was nowhere to go.
“Why are you doing this?” I asked quietly.
“Doing what?” he replied to me with a question looking very confused, as if I was asking some silly questions.
“This…” I gestured slightly between us. “Whatever this is.”
He knew exactly what he was doing, and I knew he wasn’t going to pretend about it at all. Just one dinner with me in my house and he was already taking advantage of the whole situation.
I managed to look him in the eye and noticed that he wasn’t even sorry for what he was doing. “I thought that this was what you wanted. I am not doing anything you don’t want.”
I couldn’t believe it when he said those things out of his mouth. How could he say that he thought I had always wanted this? I had made a mistake and those words that I heard from him made my chest too tight.
Although, the truth was that I really didn’t know what I wanted. Everything was just happening so fast in front of me and sometimes I was very scared of making mistakes. And now, the same is happening to me.
It’s just scaring me more than anything. “You should leave,” I said suddenly.
But I didn’t move.
I didn’t want him to feel like I was curious and at the same time not really comfortable. I invited him here all by myself, and he was beginning to make me feel like I made a mistake.
He didn’t move either. He was just looking at me like I was a ghost. Then he looked at his watch.
“It’s getting late already and it shouldn’t be bad if I keep your company here.”
“What?” What did he just say? “Where?”