Chapter 38

H A R R Y

I can never forget how she cried for help that night and how she begged for me to help her. Until this day, I can still hear her voice in my ear and it even brought me sleepless nights which bugged the hell out of me because the guilt inside me was still there.

Even until now.

I wasn’t able to do anything.

That night as soon as she called me and begged for help, I told her, “Where are you right now?”

I’m going to get you, were the words I wanted to tell her but then that would mean that I am risking my fame for the kind of mess that only married couple should be involved. If I butt in and people would know about it, they would be suspicious.

You fucking coward, I scolded myself as my heart was pounding hearing Jolene’s cry over the phone. “I’m hiding in our bedroom, He is outside banging the door. He is bloodshot drunk and he… he is holding a knife.” She cries again. “Harry I’m scared.”

I can hear Leo’s loud and roaring voice from the other side of the door as he kept banging on it. I hear his muffled voice say, “You better open this door you little whore!”

The call ends suddenly, “Hello? Jolene? Hello!” I pull the phone away from me and stared at the screen. She ended the call.

Instantly, I tried to call her back but it was no longer ringing. My heart began to pound as I tried to dial her number again which was to no avail. Ricky rushes to me wwith that worried look plastered on his face.

“What’s going on?” He asks with furrowed brows.

“It was Jolene. She was crying.” I explained.

“Oh fuck, are they fighting again?”

“Leo was screaming and pounding on the door. We have to go and help her!” I stand on my feet.

“Help her? They moved out from their old house. No one knows where they live now.”

My heart just fucking sank. This was no use, even if I wanted to help her, we still could not locate her anywhere. “We have to call the police.” I say firmly.

“We have to. I will give them a call. Maybe they can track her location through her number.” Ricky leaves me as he walks to his home telephone.

I began to walk in circles as I kept thinking and worrying about what Leo could have been doing to her by now. Moreover, where in hell did Leo even take her? He is obviously plotting something heinous and I can’t even fathom what could happen to her.

Oh God please save her and our child.

I tried calling her again but still there was no ring. The call would just end right away and it makes me even more anxious thinking where in hell they are right now at this kind of time. I waited and waited for another call but nothing.

I waited for too long that I happen to have fallen asleep on the couch. I pulled myself up as I quickly grabbed my phone and saw a voicemail coming from Jolene. My heart begins to race inside my chest as I see her name. I didn’t know what I was actually feeling because it was the kind of emotion where anxiety meets with fear. My hands were shaking as my mind holds back the thought of opening her voicemail.

I see that she had left her voicemail almost 45 minutes ago and a lot could have happened in that amount of time, my hands were still shaking with the negative thoughts invading my head. I can feel the tense growing from the pits of my stomach up to my brain in a matter of second and I feel completely sick.

Finally, I opened her voice mail at the same time Ricky joins me back in here.

She was crying but it sounded like a weaker cry. “Harry…”

It broke me how her voice sounded so frightened.

“He’s going to hurt me.” She cries over the phone as I hear a muffled sound of a door banging from her background. “Please help me. Please. He is going to kill us.”

Us. My child. He’s going to kill them.

“Please help us.” She pleads and screams at him to the other side of the door, “Leave me the fuck alone!!” She cries louder, wheezing and helplessly asking for help.

I didn’t know what to say, this was a mistake. She was a mistake to begin with. I never should have done that. I never should have done it with her in the first place.

She was hiding again in her bedroom, crying over the phone and asking for my help. It has always been like that and I hated getting this voice mails from her. She’s hurt. She’s badly hurt and she’s been fucking up my state of mind with these calls.

But I was frozen when I hear a door banging open followed by her dreadful scream. They sounded like they were fighting and he was hurting her again. I can hear her being dragged around the floor as she keeps crying and screaming, “Get the fuck away from me! Get off me!!”

I lowered my head and cried as I listen to it while Ricky kept asking me what was going on. I couldn’t do anything. I was too late to take this call. I could have helped her and drove to her place to save her at least.

The voicemail ends with a loud banging sound which made me flinch again as I listened to it the second time. It was then followed by a very deep voice which terrorized me, “I’m coming for you Harry Styles.”

I stare at my sweaty palms before pulling them up close to my lips.

“This is going to ruin you! Do you hear me?!” Ricky’s voice echoed loudly throughout the room.

My hands were shaking as I stare at my iPhone as my mind thinks about the most horrible things that happened after the voicemail was cut off. In my ears, I still hear her screaming for help as she constantly calls out my name. He was hurting her but I couldn’t do anything. I can’t do anything to help her and I feel so pathetic.

I’m so pathetic.

I’m such a coward.

I’m so selfish.

Too selfish that I am only thinking about myself.

Who am I? What happened to me?

I was never like this.

Never like this.

Never at all.

“You better not tell anyone about what you heard, do you understand?!” His voice roared.

“You want me to ignore that phone call?” I asked, trying to suppress my shaky hands.

“That woman is crazy!”

“That woman needed help!” I screamed.

“It’s out of your hands! Swallow it down the deepest pits of your gut and never tell a single soul because he is bad bad news. He was implying you a warning and you must heed it. Or I swear to God.” He warns me viciously.

“I have to see her. Please Ricky.” I begged.

“It has nothing to do with you!”

“It has everything to do with me!”

“And why do you have to go and see her?!”

“She’s carrying my child!” I roared.

Silence. The silence enveloped the entire room as Ricky stares at me which makes me a thousand times more anxious and guilty. He knew that this could ruin me and I knew it too but if there was something I could do, I wish I could have helped her. I wish there was something else that I could do for her. I wish I could have saved her from that kind of pain if only I helped her the night she told me she was pregnant.

Fucking coward.

You are such a fucking coward Harry Styles.

Such a fucking worthless piece of crap.

“Harry?”

I opened my eyes and pulled my head up as soon as I heard Louis’ voice. He sits there across me while sipping his iced black coffee. I was then pulled out from reminiscing about that night from three years ago.

“Are you alright?” He questions. “You look like you feel like shit.” He chuckles under his throat while gluing his eyes on me.

“I’m just… thinking about a lot of things.”

“Like what? You won the case a few days ago, what’s more to worry about?”

The present I received days ago which came from Jolene, that’s what I am worried about. I thought to myself but answered him, “That Griffin guy who is still hiding somewhere else.”

“Have you reported it to the police and have his photo be scattered around so people would know him at least?”

“I already did that.” I answered. “They still can’t find him and there are no reports about him too. He’s just really missing in action.”

“Oh don’t worry lad, the police will find him.”

“But till when? I can’t afford to lose her this time! I can’t afford to lose her and my child!” I reacted.

Louis shoots his brows up, “Whoa, just relax. You’re…” He chuckles softly. “You’re getting a little to tensed and uptight after the trial. Tell you what, why don’t you take a breather and relax okay?”

I sigh heavily, “I’m sorry, Lou. There’s just so many things going on in my head and… I’m sorry.”

“It’s alright. We all have our days.”

That night after we performed, I tried giving Ricky another call and the bastard still had not answered. I know he was intentionally doing it so I decided to drive to his house instead so we can have a good ole talk like we used to. I stepped out of my car and knocked on his front door to which he opened after five ring on the doorbell.

He sighs heavily, “Harry, what in hell are you doing in here?”

“I want to talk to you.”

“Go away.” He was about to close the front door but I quickly blocked my foot so he wont be able to shut me out.

“We need to talk.”

“We don’t have anything else to talk about!”

“We do. Let me in.”

“Fucking Christ Harry!” He gave in and allowed me to enter so I walked inside as I hear him complain, “What is it that you want from me this time?”

“I know you have been avoiding me.”

“Good thing you know so get out.”

“Listen, I need to know about the gift.”

He leaves me and walks towards his messy living room where there were different kinds of rubbish everywhere. There were opened boxes of pizza on the floor and on the table, plies of used tissues scattered everywhere, and all other sort of rubbish which made his entire house look like a dumpster.

“I only sent it because it was sent to my address.” He answers.

“Who sent it to you?”

“The hell do I know? It was just left outside my house.”

“You didn’t open it?”

“It was a gift for you, why would I open it?”

“Well…” I trailed off as my eyes wandered around his house and how he had changed after that night. Ricky looked like he lost everything and had no more inspiration to paint.

He look as if he just completely lost everything, “What happened to you?” I cannot help but ask him about it. This behavior was concerning to me as a friend of his.

He sits on his dirty couch and stared at me. I know he was unhappy with how his life had turned out after he lost his job at the art gallery. Since then, he stopped painting because it only reminded him of Jolene. For the past year, he grew more anxious with everything around him and developed this constant fear of the environment.

“The total opposite of what happened to you. You look like you’re living life, thank God.” He was sarcastic.

“You used to be so amazing in painting. This room was supposed to be filled with so much canvas and paints and brushes and--”

“Things change Harry.” He cuts me off.

“It’s just saddening that a talent like yours is going to waste.”

“This was all your fault.”

I gaped and was surprised that he accused me of something that he has done with his own life, “I wasn’t the reason why this happened to you.” I answered, trying to calm myself down. “You chose to be like this so stop blaming me for what happened to you after that night. You chose to live your life like this! I wanted to help you! I reached out to you!”

“I had no fucking choice, Mr. Celebrity! I am not as powerful and popular as you!”

I shake my head sideways, “I tried to help you but you were the one who shut me out.”

“Help?” He mocks and laughs. “Don’t talk to me about that word Harry because until today there is nothing to blame but you. Most importantly, you have no right to say that word because since the beginning you only thought about yourself and your fame!”

I was gutted.

“You never thought about anybody else but your fucking self!” He spat.

I sigh heavily as I begin to feel his words digging deeper into me like a sharp dagger trying to make me bleed with every push. I understand how he hates me now and he as the right to be mad at me for everything that happened before.

“I’m sorry.” I tell him.

“Get the fuck out, Harry.” He says heavily.

“The gift came from Jolene.” I spurted.

His eyes bewildered in a split second. “What?”

“That fucking gift you sent me came from her.”

“But…” He trailed off, left speechless and numb for a second. I can see the paint of surprise on his face base from how his eyes looked back at me. “How did you know?”

“There was a card.”

“What did it say?”

“It said Did you miss me.”

He shakes his head, “There is absolutely no way.”

“I saw it with my own eyes, Rick. It was written on the card which was inside. There was even a new born baby’s dress.”

He stands on his feet and his eyes still widened which paved way to how he was actually feeling. I know he is as shocked as me because it was something really surprising, “That’s got to be a joke, ain’t it?”

“If it was a joke or a prank, it isn’t even funny.”

He shakes his head, “It was not from me!”

I breathe heavily.

Rick adds, “It makes no sense. It can’t be from her! That’s impossible!”

“The handwriting was Jolene’s, Rick!” I exclaimed loudly which silenced him. “It was her fucking sign on that note! The same one in her paintings!”

His brows creasing, “But that’s not possible.”

“That’s what I thought too.”

“It could be someone else with the same handwriting as her.”

“Rick, if it was someone else then why is her handwriting so much alike to Jolene’s? It is so similar.”

Rick groans, “It cannot be her. She died that night.”