Chapter 20 Lucas's Desperation

Chapter 20 Lucas's Desperation

Lucas's POV

The mate bond was killing me.

For some reason I could feel her and share in her emotions even though I'd rejected her. It was like I was being tortured.

I wondered if she could feel my own emotions too? Probably not. I'd rejected her, not the other way around. Fuck!

I sat in my office at Eclipse, staring at the whiskey glass in my hand. It was my fourth drink tonight and I still felt every damn thing she felt.

Happiness. That's what came through the bond right now. She was happy with him.

I threw the glass against the wall and watched it shatter.

"Feel better?" My beta, Jackson, stood in the doorway.

"No." I poured another drink. "Close the door."

He did and sat across from my desk. "You look like hell."

"Thanks."

"When's the last time you slept?"

"Don't remember." I drank the whiskey in one gulp. The burn did nothing to dull the pain in my chest. "The bond won't let me."

"You rejected her. The bond should be broken."

"Should be." I poured another glass. "But it's not. I can still feel her. Every emotion. Every touch. Every time Darius puts his hands on her, I feel it."

Jackson was quiet for a moment. "Maybe you should withdraw from the challenge."

"Absolutely not."

"Lucas—"

"I'm not backing down." I slammed the bottle on the desk. "She's mine. The Moon Goddess chose us. Not her and Darius. Us."

"Then why did you reject her?" Jackson asked the question I'd been avoiding for days.

I didn't answer. Just stared at the amber liquid in my glass.

"It wasn't just about pack politics," Jackson pressed. "I've known you too long. There's something else."

I stood up and walked to the window. Eclipse territory stretched out below, lights twinkling in the darkness.

"My father," I said finally.

"What about him?"

"He sent a message. The day before Calla's birthday." I turned to face Jackson. "Said if I claimed a weak mate, he'd make sure I regretted it."

Jackson's expression hardened. "He threatened you."

"Not just me." I sat on the edge of my desk. "He knows people. Even from prison. He said he'd hurt her. Make it look like an accident. Unless I proved my strength by rejecting her."

"That's why you humiliated her in public."

"I thought if I made it clear she meant nothing to me, he'd leave her alone." I laughed bitterly. "I was protecting her. And now she hates me for it."

"Did you tell her this?"

"No."

"Lucas—"

"I can't." I cut him off. "If my father finds out I still want her, he'll go after her. Better she thinks I'm just an asshole."

"But now she's with Darius."

"Yeah." The bond pulsed, showing me another flash of happiness. Her laugh. His arms around her. "Now she's with him."

Jackson leaned forward. "You have to tell her the truth. Before the challenge."

"What good would that do?" I moved back to my chair. "She's already made her choice. Telling her now just makes me look weak."

"Or it makes you look human."

"I can't afford to look human." I met his eyes. "I'm barely holding this pack together. My father's in prison. Half the wolves question my authority. If I show weakness now, I lose everything."

"You're already losing everything." Jackson gestured at the broken glass on the floor. "The mate bond is eating you alive. You're not sleeping. You're drinking too much. And you're about to fight Darius in front of both packs."

"I'll win."

"Will you?" He stood up. "Because right now, you can barely stand. How are you going to fight in two days?"

"I'll manage."

"That's not a plan."

"It's the only plan I have." I poured another drink. "Unless you have a better idea."

Jackson was quiet for a long moment. Then he said, "There's a way to guarantee you win."

I looked up. "I'm listening."

"The Northridge pack owes us a favor. Remember when we helped them with that territory dispute?"

"Yeah."

"They have fighters. Strong ones. If we brought a few in to... assist during the challenge."

"That's cheating," I said.

"It's strategy." Jackson crossed his arms. "Pack law says the challenge must be one-on-one. But it doesn't say anything about what happens if someone interferes."

"Darius's pack would call foul."

"Let them." Jackson leaned on my desk. "By the time anyone realizes what happened, you'll have already won. Calla will be yours."

I thought about it. The mate bond pulsed again, this time with desire. She was kissing him. The image hit me so hard I had to grip the desk.

"Do it," I said. "Call Northridge. Tell them I need their best fighters."

"Lucas, this is dishonorable—"

"I don't care." I stood up. "Honor didn't get me anywhere. Being the good alpha didn't work. So now I play dirty."

"This could start a war."

"Then let it start." I moved to the window again. "I'm not losing her. I can't."

Jackson sighed. "I'll make the call. But this is on you. Whatever happens."

"I know."

He left, and I was alone again with the bond and the whiskey.

My phone buzzed. A message from the Council.

Formal gathering announced. Alpha King's Ball. All pack leaders required to attend. Challenge fight will take place during the ball, witnessed by all packs.

I read it three times.

The Alpha King's Ball. That meant every alpha from every pack would be there. Watching. Judging.

If I won using Northridge fighters, everyone would know. But if I lost, my reputation was destroyed anyway.

Another buzz. This time from my father.

Heard about the challenge. Don't embarrass me, boy. Win, or don't come visit.

I deleted the message and threw my phone on the desk.

The mate bond pulsed again. This time with fear. Calla was scared about something.

Good. She should be scared. Because tomorrow night, everything changed.

I'd win the challenge. I'd claim her as my mate. And I'd finally explain why I'd rejected her in the first place.

She'd understand. She had to.

And if she didn't? If she still chose Darius after everything?

Then I'd make sure Darius couldn't have her either.

The door opened again. Jackson came back in, phone in his hand.

"Northridge agreed," he said. "They'll send three fighters. They'll blend in with the crowd at the ball and move when you give the signal."

"Good."

"Lucas, last chance to back out. We can still cancel—"

"No." I picked up the whiskey bottle. "We do this. Whatever it takes."

Jackson nodded and left again.

She was mine. The Moon Goddess said so and I'd be damned if I let Darius Reed take what belonged to me.