Chapter 103: You Are Her Strength

Lucien

A part of me thought death would be peaceful, that it would be easy to accept when my time finally came after all the shit I had done and witnessed. I always thought that when the world started to fade from view, I would be relieved and ready but I was wrong. Death wasn't peaceful, it was violet and terrifying and I wasn't ready.

I could feel the life draining from my body as Sophie held me in her lap, knowing I was minutes from death. Moving became difficult and my extremities stopped responding to my commands as darkness started to cloud my peripheral vision. I kept my eyes glued to her as darkness took over and once her face was out of sight, I didn't feel peace. I felt rage.

There was so much life that I had left to experience with her and with my twin brother. The three of us who had been through hell and back already, no, there was no way I was giving that up. So I fought, my life with Sophie had just begun and someone had tried to rip that away from us. There was no way I was going to let that asshole win. I felt like I was drowning at one point, unable to breathe or move with nothing but darkness and unnerving quiet, so I pictured my Sophie's sweet face and clung to that image like my life deepened on it and it did.

I pictured the way she looked at us that first night at the club with her big innocent dove eyes, so curious and pure right between my brother and I, right where she belonged. I pictured how her smiles would go all the way up to her eyes when she laughed and my mind grasped and clung to images of her and Braton being playful at the house. Some of my favorite memories are watching them teasing and playing with one another, chasing each other around the house or wrestling around on the couch of the media room without a care in the world. She had so much light in her and that light was contagious, brightening the darkest of souls even Braton's. I pictured the soft contentment on her face when she painted, the way the tip of her tongue poked out from between her lips while she worked. These memories aren't enough, I need more. I need to go back to her.

I wanted more of those memories, more of those priceless experiences. This isn't my time, not yet. Eventually, I started to feel the urge to move and open my eyes, fighting like hell to stay present and instead of fading away. I internally screamed at my muscles to move but they refused to respond which only fueled my anger and determination. My eyelids were heavy and battled against me but I was about to open them slightly, letting in the bright blurry scene around me.

Keeping my eyes closed was easier and laying completely still felt good but I was scared of peace at the moment and I had to fight. I forced my eyes open and blinked away the glassy blur of the room, trying to take in my surroundings to figure out where I was. As my eyes adjusted to the dimly lit room, the sterile smell of a hospital was the first thing that registered with me, followed by the rhythmic beeping of a heart monitor.

Opening my eyes wider, I felt my senses start to come alive slowly as I took in the room. I turned to my left and saw a large body leaning forward, resting on the edge of my bed with his elbows. It was Braton, he had one of my hands between his and holding them against his forehead as he rested his eyes. His scowl was still fully intact, even as he dozed off but the second I shifted my hand beneath his, his eyes snapped open and shot over towards me.

I watched his deep scowl disappear and the corner of his mouth curl into a smile once he realized I was conscious.

"Hey, buddy." I managed to say in a gritty voice that I barely recognized.

"You scared the shit out of us, buddy." He said with compassion in his voice that I wasn't used to it. He usually saved that one with Sophie.

Still in a fog, my brain searched for memories of what had transpired that night when suddenly a memory flashed hot in my mind, showing me an image of Sophie scared and bleeding. I felt my eyes go wide and I panicked instantly.

"Where is Sophie? Is she okay? She was bleeding and….."

Braton stood up from his seat and leaned forward, putting one of his hands on my shoulders to keep me from sitting up.

"Easy easy, she is fine. Look at your right arm." He soothed with a slight chuckle.

Letting my eyes drift over to my right, I saw my sweet Sophie leaning forward from her chair, clinging to my right arm with her delicate fingers laced between mine. I could feel her slow, even breath fanning across my bicep as she slept peacefully as she was completely unfazed by our voice and movement.

"She has been out for about two hours." He said, looking over at her with pure love in his eyes.

"Let her sleep," I said quietly, focusing my attention on my right arm and trying to soak in the feeling of her body against mine.

"What the fuck happened after I went down?" He sighed, still gripping my hand tightly.

I wasn't sure if he even realized he still has a hold of my hand but he has such a tight grasp on it as if I were going to disappear if he let go.

"We put you in the car and rushed you here as fast as we could. You were…" his voice cracked slightly and he cleared his throat against the sensation.

"You didn't have a pulse, brother." He finally choked out. I closed my eyes realizing I hadn't imagined my brush with death. It was real, it was too real.

"But that girl right there…." He continued, pointing over at our sleeping Sophie.

"She fought for you, she fought like a fucking dog to keep you alive. She climbed on top of you and gave you cardiopulmonary resuscitation until the doctor peeled her off you."

My heart swelled at his words and I looked down at our girl, taking notice of the way she was clinging to my arm and trying to get as much of her skin on mine as possible.

"I thought I was going to die, Braton." I said with so much pain in my voice.

"So did I," he admitted.

"But she didn't, she refused to believe it and she saved you."

The room went quiet as we accepted and processed what she had done for me.

"I was so fucking sacred," he said showing a vulnerable side of himself to me that I rarely saw.

"If anything would have happened to you, I don't know what I would have done. What she would have done, she needs you so much and I…."

"She needs you too." I quickly interrupted him.

"Not as much as she needs you, Buddy. You are calm and I am just, hell I don't know what I am."

He always doubted himself and his importance in this world but even if he couldn't see it, Sophie and I could.

"You are her strength."

I went ahead and completed his sentence for him, hoping he would understand that we were equally important to Sophie's life in our relationship.

"Think about the first time we spent with her, she would have never walked into the sapphire side of the club if you hadn't been holding her hand. She needs you, Braton just as much as she needs me. That is why this works." He nodded at me, letting his eyes drift to get.

"She loves us fiercely, brother."

"I know," I responded.

"No, buddy, you don't understand. And I want to tell you why but I don't want to piss you off while you are in such bad shape."

I felt my expression change and I shifted my weight slightly, hoping I didn't wake her in the process.

"I am fine, tell me what happened." I demanded.

He turned his chair so he could look me in the eyes and his hesitation and reluctance to tell me meant this couldn't be good.

"The fucker that shot you was Domino's step brother. We were able to get him to the house to finish the job and once we got him in the basement…" he paused and raked his palm down his face, struggling to say his next words.

"What? Once you got him in the basement, then what happened? Did he get away or something?"

"No, he is dead. He took six rounds to the chest and abdomen."

"So what is the fucking problem? Why would that piss me off?" He shifted his weight in his chair.

"Sophie was the one who pulled the trigger."

What? He can't be fucking serious.

"What the hell, Braton? Have you lost your damn mind?"

He was right, I was pissed and I glared up at him in disbelief that he would let our innocent Sophie participate in something dark and violent.

"She insisted."

"And you should have said no, gosh." I snapped.

He swallowed his irritation and clenched his back teeth and looked at me before speaking again. And I was glaring at him. How can he allow that to happen?