Chapter 387: DON'T LEAVE

ARTEMIS' POV

I stiffen, even with her in my arms, speechless for the first few seconds before I can form any words or even make sense of what she's trying to tell me—let alone believe what I'm hearing. "W-What?"

She moves around in my arms, signaling she wants to be let down from my hold, and I gently set her on her feet but not without securing my hold on her. "What are you saying? Leave to go where?" My voice grows more frantic with every second, and the more she avoids my gaze. "Artemis, listen to me..."

"No, Sera, you're not leaving. Didn’t you just hear me? You don’t have to leave or hide anymore. I’m fixing everything; it will just take some time," I argue as gently as I can, hoping within myself that somehow she's playing a joke—a cruel joke, albeit, but one nonetheless. I can take any joke, as much as she wants to dish out, but I can’t take her leaving me. She finally meets my eyes, tears brimming within them, with a trembling lower lip. The look on her face kills me, yet I can't understand why she's doing this to us, right now. "I have to leave because I have to learn how to control my powers. Because it’s something you can’t help me with."

"We haven’t tried, have we? You just woke up!" I argue harder, turning away from her. "Please, this isn’t easy for me."

"Then don’t. I just got you back, and now you want me to let you leave?"

"It would only be for a while. I’ll come back when I feel ready."

"And when will that be… what if you never feel ready?"

"Artemis," she calls me, holding my face between both her palms to calm me down. "Please, Sera… please don’t leave me."

"I love you," she whispers, sobbing now, tears I wish I could take away, but I slowly realize I can’t. The pain she feels, the pain haunting her, tearing her apart from the inside—the pain I can’t take away for her. The same way I can’t put an end to my own pain and trauma simply by burying it deep within my own mind. I hate it so much because, once more, it's a testament to how much I cannot do for her, how weak I am. Once more, I cannot protect her. "You’ve put in so much for both of us, even while I was asleep. It isn’t fair to you for me to expect you to fix me. I feel helpless and weak, having no control over my trauma and powers, putting all that burden on you."

I shake my head, trying to deny it and somehow plead with her to give it all to me regardless. How desperately I’m willing to take it all just to keep her here, but she shakes her head, somehow reading my mind. "I need to find myself again, the bits and pieces of me that are broken and shattered from all my experiences and piece them back together. I need to feel like myself again. It doesn’t mean you couldn't protect me… it just means I need to work on myself, too."

"I don’t want you to leave," I say, closing my eyes tighter, inhaling her scent, and fighting the tears in my eyes. "I don’t want to say goodbye so soon again."

"I’m sorry," she apologizes, trembling in my hands, feeling just as emotional as I am. I feel her pain; I know it isn’t easy. I also know that she might really need this. She doesn’t have to be sorry. "I don’t know how I’m going to do this without you."

"You have been doing a good job already. You never needed me."

"I do, dammit. I need you," I half-yell, clutching onto her. "You have to write to me every day."

"Every second if possible."

"And come back to me as fast as you can."

"In a flash," she assures me. "We have to promise to achieve everything possible before we see each other again."

"Fuck," I swear under my breath, pulling her closer towards me, digging my face into the crevice of her neck, and inhaling her scent, taking in enough as if she’s leaving this very moment. I want to savor this moment for as long as possible. Yet no matter how long the kiss is, it’s not enough to satiate me, to console me. I pull away, looking at her more seriously. "You can’t leave until we do one more thing together," I say, dropping to my knees right in front of her. Confusion takes over her features while I take both of her hands in mine. "Marry me."

"Artemis…" she gasps, speechless and dumbfounded, getting ready to give me a million reasons why it’s a bad idea doing it now, but I don’t let her even begin. "I can’t let you leave until you’re completely mine, Sera. That’s my only requirement. Will you marry me, Seraphina Hawthrone… will you be mine forever?"

More tears fill her eyes until she breaks into an uncontrollable sob, unable to keep her emotions at bay, and nods her head rapidly. "Yes. I will. I’ve never wanted anything so bad."

I get to my feet and pick her up in my arms in a swift moment, pressing my lips against hers in the most passionate kiss, until there is no definite line where I end and she begins.