Chapter 84: No Return

Zorrik read the note while Han warmed up and dug into a bowl of stew at the compound. Then he read the note again before handing it to Ra'Jeem. The Disciple read it and then handed it to Jefor and Eloria.

"I can't believe they'd take things this far," Zorrik said breathlessly.

Ra'Jeem shook his head. "The Royal Palace did send us here to stop the Rebellion," he pointed out. "Apparently, they see us as part of that now."

His Master looked at him in surprise, but then slowly nodded his head. "Sa'mood has been looking for a reason to get rid of me for years. He's always been jealous. I guess he got sick of waiting for me to die or retire."

"This will definitely make a name for him," Ra'Jeem agreed. "Maybe he'll be Gall's top Assassin."

"Hell, if the Palace agrees with their actions, I'm sure he'll be the Imperial City's top Assassin," Zorrik said through clenched teeth.

"We have another problem," Jefor cut in.

The two of them turned toward him, frowns crossing their faces. Zorrik shook his head as his old friend held up the letter.

"How did they know what we were doing up here? We have a spy in our ranks."

Zorrik's breath caught in his throat. He knew Jefor was right. He turned back to his Mate, his eyes hard. Ra'jeem, though, only looked dejected.

"Probably more than one," the Disciple said. "What are we going to do?"

"We don't have time to weed them out. We'll just have to call them out directly, offer them a deal if they stand down."

Ra'Jeem shook his head. "No, I mean, what are we going to do, Zorrik? Are we really prepared to make war against our own people?"

The Assassins silently looked at one another, no one sure what to say. Finally, Han finished his last spoonful of stew and stood up.

"Whatever we're going to do, it needs to be decided quickly," he said. "The garrison can't be more than a day behind me."

Caldan and Perrin had been respectful and given them their space to discuss what they'd learned, but now the two of them stepped over to the table. The Assassins glanced over at them, and Zorrik looked into Perrin's young yet wise face. After a moment, he gave the young man a brusque nod. Perrin returned it, and Zorrik could tell he was trying to keep his expression even.

It had been decided. Jefor and Eloria nodded as well, though they looked as daunted as Perrin. When Zorrik turned to Ra'Jeem, his Disciple didn't meet his eyes. He looked at the ground, and after a moment, he shook his head and walked away. Zorrik started to go after him, but he felt Eloria's hand on his arm. When he looked at her, she simply shook her head. Zorrik watched his Mate walk away and then turned back to the rest of the group to make plans for the coming battle.

When Zorrik and Ra'Jeem had been released, they'd been given a small set of quarters in the compound. Later that day, after all the preparations had been made, Zorrik walked back to their room, feeling dejected himself at this point. This situation was something he'd never imagined, much less trained for.

He hesitated at the door. He put his hand against it, but couldn't bring himself to open it. He took a deep breath, about to grab the handle, when it suddenly opened. Ra'Jeem opened it and then walked back into the room without looking at Zorrik. His Master stood in the doorway for a moment and then stepped in and closed the door behind him.

He didn't know what to say, and couldn't stand the sight of Ra'Jeem's back. "Please look at me," he finally pleaded.

Ra'Jeem turned, but only glanced at Zorrik before looking at the floor. "What are we doing, Zorrik?" he whispered.

"We're protecting these people. That's what we were trained to do."

Ra'Jeem finally looked up at him. "We were trained to protect the Empire."

"The Empire is its people! Otherwise, what does any of it matter?"

His Disciple crossed his arms and rubbed his chin. A stern look crossed his face, and he shook his head. He paced across the floor and then turned away from Zorrik again.

"Assassins don't kill Assassins. It's our first rule," he said, quietly.

Zorrik sighed and shook his head. "What about all those people the Royal Family sent us to kill over the years? What if they were just trying to build a better life for themselves? What if they weren't the real enemy? That makes us murderers, Ra'Jeem!"

Ra'Jeem glanced back in surprise and dismay. It was something he hadn't considered. He felt his world falling apart. Everything he'd ever known, everything he'd ever believed. Was it really all a lie? He took a deep breath, trying and failing to hold back the tears that had threatened to overwhelm him.

"There's no coming back from this, Zorrik," he whispered. "We'll never be able to go home."

Zorrik sighed deeply and stepped closer. "I know. I'm sorry."

Ra'Jeem slowly turned, tears streaming down his face. The tears turned to sobs as his Mate took his hands in his. He looked at Zorrik, desperate for something to soothe the pain.

The Master Assassin smiled softly at him and then wiped away his tears. He pulled him closer and put a hand on his chest. He waited for Ra'Jeem to return the gesture and then pulled his head down so that their foreheads touched.

"We're all we need," he said. "As long as we have each other, we are home."

Ra'Jeem chuckled softly and nodded. Then they closed their eyes and stood there until the rest of the world seemed to disappear. In that moment, none of their problems mattered, but it didn't last forever. After a few minutes, Ra'Jeem stepped back and looked at Zorrik earnestly.

He took the Master Assassin's hands in his again and took a breath. "I've heard what you said, and I...understand. I still need time, though, Zorrik. I need to think about this."

Zorrik gulped down a lump in his throat and let go of Ra'Jeem's hands. "Of course, take all the time you need."