Chapter 27: Zac is a father?

Zac parked the car in front of Dariu's Coffee, I looked at him and sighed deeply. We got out of the car and walked towards the entrance to the coffee shop, I let him lead the way and as soon as he opened the door I could see over his shoulder, blond hair at the far end of the store, as my boyfriend approached the table, Mandy jumped up and came towards him smiling but as soon as she saw me her face turned expressionless, she had hated seeing me there and I loved seeing her reaction. Zac took my hand and put me next to him, the blonde standing in front of us followed our every move and that somehow bothered me, Mandy was someone negative, with very bad energy.

“Oh, I thought it was just going to be the two of us,” she says a while later.

“Cassy will be part of everything now, whatever you want to tell me from now on, she'll be there.” he says firmly, making her swallow, this moment was uncomfortable for me, and I just wanted to be able to run out of there.

“But I need to tell you something that belongs to us...” she says and I feel an urge take me over.

“My girlfriend would know anyway, I wouldn't hide it from her,” says Zac ”Can we sit down? I'm starving,” he says, and she quickly nods and returns to her seat, Zac sits down and I do the same.

A waitress then appeared and took our orders, I ordered something light because my stomach wasn't feeling very well, and being in that heavy atmosphere didn't feel good at all. The minutes ticked by and no one said anything, which made it seem like we'd been there for hours. Mandy ate calmly and that was the only moment I envied her, I wished I could eat without being in this damn atmosphere. Zac, like me, just nibbled at his food. That was it for me, I poked his leg under the table, making him look at me and see how distressed I was, he took a deep breath and finally decided to open his mouth.

“You can open your mouth Mandy, just tell me what you need to say.” Her voice comes out harsh, and the woman in front of us is startled by her tone.

Mandy puts her plate down and sighs dramatically “First Zac, I want you to know that I love you, and I've never stopped loving you,” she says and I try hard not to roll my eyes “I know I was an idiot when I ran away from you, but it was the only way I could do what I wanted, do you understand me?” she says and I still don't understand what she's getting at with this nonsensical conversation.

“I'm a nymphomaniac,” I arch my eyebrows when she tells me this and I try not to laugh ”Ever since I was little, I've always felt strange things in my body, especially when I went to the shower and had to wash myself. What triggered it all were the movies my father kept at home,” she says and at that moment I listen to her attentively ”The first time I watched them was one night when they went out to dinner and the nanny who looked after me was high, so I ended up going to his office and finding it. From that moment on, I felt that I had changed. It was with you that I discovered some things, that made me more open to sex, so until a certain moment it was enough for me to have you.” she says and I see her eyes tear up, Zac is tense next to me, just like me.

“You got tired of me.” he said and she quickly denied it.

“No, my God, I would never get tired of you!” she says desperately "But the sex we had, as great as it was, wasn't satisfying me anymore, I felt like I wanted to know new things, my body was asking for more and I fought so hard against it, I tried therapy but it didn't work and that's when I got involved with other boys and girls." she bites her lip and looks at the brunette next to me and he's panting, Zac was very angry.

“You're a bitch, all this time I've been just another doormat of yours.” he whispered between his teeth, I touched his hand to try to calm him down, but he pulled away from me, leaving me hurt.

“I'm not a slut, I'm a person with an illness who needs treatment. But I don't have the strength to do it alone Zachary, I don't.” She bursts into tears, as if asking for help and I hate the feeling that grows in my chest.

“Zac?” I call him softly and he looks at me "Listen to her, let Mandy tell you the whole story and then you can say what you think, say what you need to say to her." I say it for the first time.

“Thanks Cassy.” says Mandy and I smile small at her.

Since Zac didn't say anything, she opted to continue her story. “After all the trouble I got myself into, I went back to therapy and that's when weeks later I found out I was pregnant,” she says and I feel the air in my lungs fill up. Zac is a father? “I was pregnant with your child, Zac.” she cries again.

“How can you be sure it was mine if you cheated on me to the extreme?” he says mockingly.

“You were the only one I had sex with who didn't use protection, all the others I always took care of,” she says and he laughs.

“How can you be sure of that?” he asks again.

“I'm sure, and I've always used morning-after pills too. But only with you, I didn't take anything and I didn't even use a condom and you know that very well.” she says and at that moment, I want to get out of there even more and let them sort it out.

“And where is this child?” I can feel Zac getting upset by this news, even though he tries to show indifference.

“When I found out I was pregnant, it shook me to my core and I couldn't take it and that's how Ryan came into the picture,” she says referring to Zac's best friend "Ryan never cheated on you, we never had an affair, in fact I made him think he did, that we'd had too much to drink and that we'd had sex, inducing him to run away with me because what I intended to do, couldn't be here, not with you near me." she says and I feel a shiver run through my body, Mandy had something bad about her and something tells me she's done something wrong.

“Where is that damn child?” I was startled by the way Zac spoke, how could he talk about an innocent being like that? “What did you do, Mandy?” he asked again.

“You know I've always loved my body, I've always been vain about it, Zac. When I found out I was pregnant, the first thing I did was run to my room and look at myself in the mirror, I took off all my clothes and watched every bit of me,” she says and her eyes are desperate ”When I imagined my belly growing, cellulite and stretch marks taking over, I threw up on the spot. I couldn't do that, I didn't want to deform myself, I didn't want that thing inside me,” she laughs ”How could I allow that to grow inside my belly? Something you couldn't even love, because fuck! How could I love someone who destroyed me, who left me broken?” Hearing those words come out of that woman's mouth made me crave something, and when the bile rose in my throat, I ran to the bathroom and when I got there I threw it all out. How can someone be so selfish in their actions and words? How can someone be so evil?

After recovering, I washed my mouth and face. I waited for a few minutes, until I was sure I could handle looking at that slut outside, and when I felt ninety percent, I left the bathroom and headed for the table. But the scene I saw surprised me.

Zac held both of Mandy's hands, stroking them while the blonde cried as if she were having a seizure. And looking at that scene made me know, made me understand: Zac would never resolve his past with her, they have something that connects them regardless of what happened years ago. I feel stupid for having allowed myself to like him and even start to fall in love with him. Zac could have tried, but there was already someone engraved on his heart, and all the time she stayed away and he shielded himself, it was because the brunette in front of me was waiting for his true love. I quickly wiped away the damn tears that had come down, took a deep breath and put a small smile on my face. That was the moment when I needed to get out and leave the road clear, I needed to live my life and forget the mistake I'd made by getting involved with someone who was just as screwed up as I was.

“Zac,” I call him softly and he takes a few seconds to look at me, his brown eyes are watery and I end up swallowing. "I have to go, Alicia called me and she needs me urgently," I say to him and he nods and as he gets up, I wave my hand at him, who doesn't understand why.

“I want you to stay and finish your conversation, you don't have to worry,” I say and he bites his lip "I'll see you later." And so I leave that place, feeling an ache take over my heart, I swallow the tears that want to come down and I walk to Zac's car, pick up my backpack and then I go home, in fact, I go to a place that brings me the peace I need right now.