Chapter 154: I want freedom

NIKOLAI'S POV

A hard thrust...

My hand went to my rock hard dick as I touched myself, teasing the tip of it for his viewing pleasure. I could see the way his eyes darkened, how he pulled his lower lip between his teeth.

He sat up on his knees, pulling me up with him, he made me sit over his cock again and I wrapped my arms around his neck, moving up and down. I wrapped my legs around him, taking him in deeper.

We were eye to eye, nose to nose, lips to lips. His grip over my ass turned harder, rougher as he slammed into me and at the same time pulled me down over his length.

"Just so you know..." I swallowed, my throat was so dry, our noses touched with every thrust, "This won't happen again."

He laughed, I squinted my eyes because his smug face was pissing me off.

"We'll see..."

"We are still getting a divorce," I said through clenched teeth.

This made him even madder than he already was, his thrust was so hard that a scream bubbled up from my throat, and my nails dug into his shoulders, breaking the skin.

Keeping my ass in place, he fully rammed into me. He pulled himself away, leaving only the tip inside before he rammed once more making my eyes water at the strong sensation, my walls clenched around his cock.

I stifled a scream when he did it again. He was using all of his strength into these thrusts, every time he'd thrust, a groan left his lips at the exertion, and a shriek left mine.

No matter what I did, he overpowered my every action. He was stronger, much tougher than me.

I just couldn't win, no matter how much I tried to fight him off.

"Fucking Nikolai. Who the fuck do you think you are? Who the fuck do you think you're dealing with? If you utter the word divorce again, I'll fucking make you regret it!"

I held his face with one hand, leaning closer. "I'm so tired of your empty threats, Alessandro."

Then he pounded so hard into me that I screamed. It was pain. It was aggressive and I loved it. My eyes rolled back into my head as I threw my head back, outstretching my neck, and the next second, his mouth was on it, sucking, nipping, biting.

Both of his hands were over my ass, gripping them with all his might, his fingers dug painfully into my skin. I couldn't see anything, I could only feel.

Him just him...

"Oh, god... Alessandro... Oh..."

A hard thrust, "You get on my fucking nerves."

I couldn't say anything as pressure started to build in my lower stomach, making me curl my toes.

Another thrust, "No one has ever slapped me, but you have done it not once but so many fucking times that I have lost count."

"Oh, ow... Alessandro!"

Another thrust that almost made me lose my mind, "You fucking ran away from me..."

"Shit! Shit..." my legs trembled, losing all the strength in them.

Thrust, "You made me fucking obsessed with you."

"Alessandro... I'm... Ah..."

I again grabbed his face with both of my hands, our noses touching as I came so hard that I think I saw all the fucking stars in the galaxy. I screamed and panted, my orgasm lasted forever, leaving my body a weak, thoroughly fucked mess.

Then my eyes shot open as I realized what had happened. I let go of Alessandro's face and it dropped to rest between my neck, he was panting as well... still reeling from his orgasm...

I let him....

fuck me raw.... After spending a pretty good time without him.

My stomach turned to ice, all the warmth leaving my body. I pushed him back, getting off of him, "What the fuck, Alessandro?!"

"What?" a frown appeared on his forehead as he watched me.

"Shit!" I got off the bed and rummaged through drawers.

My fear turned into reality when I felt his cum leaking out of me and trailing down my thigh.

"What the fuck is wrong?" he snapped. "Would it kill you to wear a condom?", I asked. I know we have never used a condom ever since he married me but I think right now it was necessary. I no longer trusted him.

Alessandro's frown deepened as he watched me. His eyes were like fire ready to burn me if I said another word. He grabbed my arm and pulled me back over the bed.

"Why the fuck would I wear a condom?"

I pushed on his chest, "Because I don't know if you don't have STIs",

He blinked, caught off guard.

I stepped back, trembling with fury and frustration.

“You’ve been out there God knows where, with God knows who,” I hissed. “I don’t know what you’ve been doing while I was gone. You could’ve slept with anyone. Women. Men. Hell, both", I ranted without thinking.

"Shit. Are you saying that I have HIV/ AIDs or.......

“No that’s not what I’m trying to say, I’m tired, Alessandro. Tired of living for other people. First, my parents, then you, and now Paul fucking Salvatore…” I shook my head, a bitter laugh escaping my lips. “For once, I just want to live for myself.”

I turned away, trying to breathe through the lump in my throat. “I want to feel like I have control over something in my life. Over my body. Over my choices. Over who I let inside me,physically and emotionally.” Every word that came out of my mouth wasn’t an answer for his question. Alessandro probably realized it that I wasn’t fine.

When he didn’t say anything , I slumped over the bed then pushed my face into the pillow. Within seconds , I felt his hand softly trailing down my back, his fingers leaving a trail of goosebumps in their wake.

"Nikolai..." he whispered, nuzzling his face into my half-wet, half-dry, and half-mess of a hair.

I moved away from him, I suddenly just wanted to curl up in my sheets and cry. "You got what you wanted, right? You wanted to fuck me... You did, now can you just leave..."

There was silence between us as I pulled the sheets over my naked body and turned on my side. I felt his hands all over me, and my body ached.

Suddenly, he grabbed my shoulder and turned me over my back. I opened my mouth to say something, ready to light him on fire but he placed a finger over my lips. His body adjusted perfectly between my legs.

"Shh... you wanna live for yourself? You want your freedom? You can have it, you can have it all you want but do not expect me to give you a divorce for that." he leaned closer, and our noses touched.

"Alessandro..."

"No, Nikolai, I can't leave you. You have me, you have Alessandro De Luca in the palm of your hands. I have never wanted another man or woman like I want you. You can have some time to figure your shit out but you can't get rid of me forever. Forever is a very long time. I might be able to give you a month or two but forever is completely out of the question. Divorce is out of the question."

I looked into his eyes, searching for something I didn't even know, "I hate you, Alessandro..." I whispered lowly, I didn't know why I said that.

His lips curled into a malicious smirk, he gave his head a gentle shake. "No, you don't..."

His lips slowly touched mine and I realized, we hadn't kissed this whole time; we were too busy chewing each other's heads off.

I felt his tip brushing against my entrance, he was stroking himself. I jerked my hips up and he understood what I wanted. He always did...

He slowly entered me this time, taking his time with each thrust. He kept kissing my lips, my neck, my eyes.

Our hands intertwined, our fingers interlaced, resting on either side of me.

This time, we didn't talk, we didn't utter a single word.

This time, it was different.

It almost felt like love...

It didn’t fully feel like love because I had Leah's words, sounding in my head.