Chapter 53: Part-53

It has been a week since everything was back to normal. Or how it looked like. After that night Randhir started maintaining distance from Sanyukta though not completely but still in his own ways. No matter how hard he tried to overcome his guilt or tell her the truth. He failed in both the cases miserably. Sanyukta observed his behavior and tried all her ways to know the reason. But he was a hard keeper just like her. She would kiss him but he won't kiss her back. She would hug him but he use to just hold her back. He was doing all what a loving and caring husband should do. But still something was missing. Her old Randhir was missing. "Randhir..." "Hmm." He hummed. "Can I ask you something?" She asked "Hmm.." He hummed again. "Gussa ho?" She asked sitting next to him. "No." He replied. "So why are you behaving like this?" She asked irritated by his behavior "Like how?" He asked. "Uhmm.. weird.. you are not talking to me properly... You have not call me your princess since one week.. I miss all those things Randhir... I miss my old Randhir.." "I will call you all that.." He caressed her cheek. "But now you should sleep. We have a big day tomorrow." He said. Finally the day of her being operated has  arrived. Everybody was tensed. Randhir was all worried but right now he has to be strong because she needs him. "I won't get myself operated.. until and unless you tell me what's wrong with you." Her voice clearly show how frustrated she was right then because of his behavior. "Sanyukta that's not a joke.. go and sleep." He ordered getting up from the couch. "I won't.. answer me first.." That's enough for her now. She was loosing all her calm. "Sanyukta.. Go. And. Sleep." He said calmly holding her hand. He so hate himself right now for her condition. Sanyukta kept on standing at her place without moving a inch. "Sanyukta..let's go to sleep.. please." He pleaded. "Randhir I'm telling you.. stop this behavior of yours." She yelled. She had enough of all this. He was hiding something and she needs to know it by hook or by crook. "Sanyukta what have I done now." Randhir asked in confusion. He wasn't expecting such an outburst from her side. He knew she was having some doubt regarding her behavior but it will come out like this. He never thought. "That is the problem Randhir.. You are doing nothing.. why are you behaving so strange.. are you still angry.. if yes.. tell me..what should I do to get my old Randhir back. What should I do..that you love me like before... How many times should I say sorry.. Randhir.. Tell me.. I will say that much time but please don't act strange.." She cried clutching his collar. "Sanyukta I love you and you are not at fault." He said. "Then tell me Randhir what is the reason?" "Sanyukta.. I need to confess something." He took a deep breath and cupped her face. She looked at him in confusion but she let him continue it. "I don't deserve you.. you deserve better.. somebody.. who only will love you.. somebody on whom you will have all right.. somebody who hadn't been claimed before. I will divorce you Sanyukta once you get well.. or rather you will divorce me.. whom am I to divorce you.. you deserve happiness and all I give you is pain. Even I could not let you trust me. I kept on breaking your trust. I cheated on you Sanyukta. I slept with somebody else. How can I do this. I say I love you.. still I do things to make you hate me." And before Randhir could speak something further a tight slap landed on his cheek making it all red. The slap was unexpected. He thought she will cry and shout but her face void of any emotion. Making it hard for Randhir to say something. "Sanyukta I'm really sorry.. it wasn't intentional.. I love you.. I can never even think of cheating.. It was... just that.. I was drunk.. I know this excuse will not work... but..." He cupped her face. "I will do anything to rectify it.. in fact you can give me any punishment I will bear it.." He sighed. "Don't touch me Randhir." She flinched his hands. "I was so wrong... I should have thought a man like you can never change... All of you need just one thing from us.. your physical satisfaction.. You tried enough.. but still you could not get me and had enough.. so all you thought was one night stand." She felt disgusted saying all this. Right then her mind was not letting her think rational. Whatever came in her mind was automatically on her mouth. "Sanyukta I really love you..." "Don't say you love me... please don't insult the word love.. I was only mad who fell in love with you.. I thought you are a changed man now.. you love me but no.. you don't.. You are still that old Randhir.. May be you were not able to claim me yet that's you were behaving all sweet with me.. First you forced me but that didn't worked so you thought of something else like.. Mmm... Yes.. Like being sweet. You thought eventually this foolish woman will give to your charms. " Sanyukta said interrupting Randhir in between. "Enough Sanyukta.." He yelled pinning her against the wall. He know he had done wrong but she has no right to doubt his love for her. His love for her is pure and serene. He agree he was wrong in beginning for forcing himself on her but he had already apologized for it and told her the reason too. And moreover she has not done anything  wrong by falling in love with him. He too deserve love. And finally when she has confessed it he want to make things clear. "Don't you dare doubt my love for you sanyukta.. I. Do. Really. Love. You." He said each word firmly and with authority. Sanyukta was taken back by his sudden reaction. But she can't be weak. She can't be used. She want everything to be back like before but she don't want to get hurt either. "Randhir you.. broke my trust.." She whispered. "I know sanyukta but please give me a chance to explain.. hear me out once..I still give you all right to decide whatever you want to do but don't yoy think you should know everything before making judgments." He pleaded. "Tell me everything from the beginning Randhir." Her voice was cold. She wanted to hear him out. She wanted him to come out innocent. She wanted her love to win. "First sit.." He said making her sit on the bed as he kneeled in front of her taking both her palm between his. He told her everything from beginning that how frustrated he was on her for her behavior and how angry he was on himself for slapping her that day. He never can imagine himself loosing control like this especially with  Sanyukta. He was hating himself for the act. With all the commotion going inside his brain he landed inside the bar and within few minutes he was all drunk. But still all the while he was thinking about her. About ways to apologize to her. And he don't know when that girl came and sat on his lap. "Sanyukta I was too drunk to think rationally. That girl.took advantage of it and told me she is you.. that  she is sanyukta.. I was in guilt Sanyukta.. I thought it was really you..I had to apologize to you anyhow for my not so acceptable behavior... And I don't know when that blunder happened.. I really don't know..trust me Sanyukta I can never cheat on you.. I really really love you.. with all my heart.." He cried resting his head on her lap.