Chapter 42 With Me
I can’t sleep. I have been trying for at least the last two hours. My brain won’t stop replaying the fight, the argument, my reaction, Cassie, literally everything it can think of.
The moon shines into the cabin; the only sounds are the bugs outside and the occasional snore or the sheets shifting. I roll in the bed so many times that I get tired of hearing my own sheets move. Which led me to finally get up, put on some better clothes, and go see Alec. I mean, he is the biggest reason I can’t sleep, so why not wake him up?
I sneak out of the cabin, not caring so much to hide the sound of the window closing behind me. If the door of our cabin didn’t creak so loudly every time it opened, I would gladly use it. But instead, I’m crawling through my window like a fool.
It’s even quieter outside. I can tell the whole camp is trying to behave after yesterday and today. It’s early morning, so it’s yesterday now. Normally, even at this time, some voices or games can be heard, but it’s the quietest I’ve heard it since the first night.
My footsteps are loud on the grass as I walk the well-known path to his house. I don’t know what I’ll say to him, but at this point, I trust it’ll just come to me when I see him. I come out of the woods into his backyard.
I should have guessed he couldn’t sleep either. He’s sitting in one of the lawn chairs, his eyes already pinning me down. He probably heard me coming from far back. He doesn’t move, and I know he’s trying to give me the floor, to let me decide how fast or slow this is going to go. At least he knows he did wrong. His hair is a mess, and he looks like he’s scared I’m going to demand a break or something. He always jumps to conclusions like this. He should know after the whole werewolf thing that I won’t leave him so easily.
I spot his hands resting on the chair, awkwardly. But what catches my eye are the bruises scattered all across his knuckles.
“Are you okay?” My voice is loud in the quiet night. I come to stand a few feet in front of him.
“I’m fine. Are you okay?” He stands unable to stop himself any longer.
I gesture to his hands, “Aren’t you hurt?”
He looks at his hands as though he’s seeing them for the first time. Even though they look awful, he shrugs it off, letting them drop back at his side. “It’s not really hurt anymore. They’ve already healed the bruise just hasn’t cleared up yet.”
Right, he’s a werewolf.
“I’m so sorry for fighting with him. I should’ve listened to you and respected your wishes, but I just made things even harder for you. Again.” He sounds so pathetic.
“You should be sorry, and I hope you learned your lesson and don’t do this again. But I’m not livid with you. Heck, I’m not even really mad at you anymore.”
The relief is instantaneous at my words. It’s like I just took the weight of the world off his shoulders.
“Don’t ever do that again, though, or we’ll be having a very long conversation.”
He nods eagerly. At this point, I think I could tell him to crawl on the ground, and he’d do it as long as I forgave him. “I won’t, I promise. You understand why I did it, thought right?”
“Yes and no. You should’ve just left him; he was trying to rile you up.”
“But I couldn’t just listen to him keep talking about you like that. You don’t deserve a single ill word spoken against you, let alone the shit he said.”
I can’t fully fault him in this reasoning. I think in another time, I would probably start a fight over him for the same reasons.
“I get that, and I appreciate you defending me, but you broke his nose and his arm. You can’t fight humans like that.”
“I know. I’ve been scolded enough by my friends as well, so I won’t make the same mistake again.”
The mention of his friends reminds me of Cassie. “Cassie was there.” I stated wanting him to continue the conversation.
“I know I’m sorry I told her not to follow me, but she was worried something like this would happen or worse.”
“She’s really strong. Are all werewolves strong despite age or gender?”
He doesn’t acknowledge the randomness of my question or statement, opting instead to answer me. “Yes, we’re significantly stronger than humans, no matter what, and if we train, we’re even stronger. Cassie comes from a family of hunters, so she trains more than me.”
“I’m glad she was there, though.”
“Do you want to try talking to her soon?”
“Probably especially after all of this, it’d be good for us to talk it out once and for all.”
“Can I hug you?”
I roll my eyes but nod nonetheless. “You never have to ask for a hug.”
He wraps his arms around me, pulling me tightly against him. It’s a warm hug that I could honestly never get tired of. It’s my soulmate's hug. Sometimes, when things like this happen, I fear I might let him off the hook too easily, just because he is my soulmate, whom I love with all my heart. But I remind myself of the sadness and fear he has before I forgive him. He beats himself up enough for both of us.
“I don’t deserve you.” He says as if reading my mind. I don’t say anything, only letting him hug me tighter.
“Can I sleep here?” I know it’s a waste of a question. He’ll never deny me a home with him; even if he were gone, I’d still be welcome here. He loosens the hug, looking down at me. At least his face wasn’t even scratched by the fight.
“Do I need to answer that?”
I shake my head, no. I can finally sleep as soon as I’m in his arms with him. I think I could sleep anywhere as long as he's with me.