Chapter 199
Kara
They saved my life, I thought, watching the helicopter disappear into the swirling snow. Took Diana's punishment meant for me. And I can't even ride with them to make sure they're okay.
Blake's arms tightened like he'd heard the thought, though I knew our bond didn't work that way. Not yet. Maybe not ever, if the guilt twisting through my gut had anything to say about it.
The second helicopter followed moments later with my parents—my parents, alive, really alive—and something cracked open in my chest that I'd kept locked away for ten years. I caught a glimpse of Dmitri's silver hair through the window, his weathered face bent over Celeste's stretcher with the kind of desperate tenderness that made my throat close up.
He'd looked at me before boarding, those pale eyes so much like my mother's holding a question he was too afraid to ask. Can I? Am I allowed to care for you after all these years of absence?
I'd nodded, unable to speak past the lump in my throat. Unable to process that I had a grandfather—family, real blood family who'd spent a decade searching for me instead of the parents I'd believed had simply thrown me away like garbage.
"Your grandfather will take good care of them," Cole said quietly, his hand finding my shoulder. His fingers pressed against the mate mark there with unconscious possessiveness, and I felt the tremor running through him—the barely controlled need to check me over, to catalogue every injury, to fix what had been broken.
"I know." My voice came out steadier than I felt. "I just... I wanted to go with them. To be there when they wake up properly."
"You will be." Asher's voice cut through with Alpha authority, brooking no argument. "After you've been checked over. After we're sure the baby—" He stopped, jaw working. "After we're sure you're both safe."
The baby. My hand drifted to my abdomen, where our child—our child who somehow survived Diana's nightmare—rested safe beneath my palm. I still couldn't quite wrap my head around it. Pregnant. Carrying the child of three Alphas who'd once made my life hell and now would burn the world down to keep me safe.
The irony wasn't lost on me. Neither was the fierce, primal satisfaction that came with it.
"I need to see them," I said, surprising myself with the firmness in my voice. "Just for a few minutes. To make sure they're real. That I didn't hallucinate the whole thing."
The silence that followed was heavy with unspoken concern. Through our bond, I felt Asher calculating risks, Cole weighing my emotional state against my physical one, Blake wrestling with the urge to lock me away somewhere safe and never let anyone near me again.
Part of me—the part that was still that eight-year-old girl shivering on the doorstep—wanted to let him. Wanted to curl up in their den and hide from the world until the terror stopped clawing at my insides.
But I'd spent ten years hiding. Ten years making myself small and quiet and good in the hope that it would keep me safe. And where had it gotten me? Kidnapped, nearly possessed, watching my parents' bodies be used as puppets by Diana's followers.
No. I was done hiding.
"Five minutes," Asher said finally, his voice carrying the weight of a concession that cost him. "Then you're getting checked over whether you like it or not, and I don't want to hear a word of protest."
"Wouldn't dream of it," I murmured, earning a skeptical snort from Blake as he carried me toward the waiting SUV. His arms were steady beneath me, but I could feel the fine tremor running through his muscles—the aftermath of adrenaline and terror and relief all crashing together.
He's scared, I realized with a jolt. They all are. Scared that if they let me out of their sight, I'll disappear again.
The thought should have felt suffocating. Should have triggered every instinct I had to push back, to assert my independence, to prove I didn't need them.
Instead, it made me feel... cherished. Protected. Wanted in a way that had nothing to do with mate bonds or Alpha instincts and everything to do with the three men who'd torn through hell itself to find me.
The SUV's leather was cold against my skin, still tacky with melted snow from their frantic drive to the pharmaceutical plant. How long ago had that been? Hours? Days? Time had lost all meaning in Diana's nightmare, every moment stretching into eternity while simultaneously blurring together into a single endless scream.
Cole slid in beside me, his mint scent immediately soothing some of the raw edges in my mind. His hand found mine, fingers threading together with the kind of gentle certainty that made my chest ache. "You scared the hell out of us, sweetheart."
"I know." I leaned into his shoulder, letting his warmth seep into my bones. The cold had settled deep during my captivity, the kind of chill that came from more than just Alaska's winter. "I'm sorry."
"Don't." The word came out sharp enough that I flinched, and Cole immediately gentled his tone, free hand coming up to cup my face. "Don't you dare apologize for surviving. For being so fucking brave that you rescued your own parents and half a dozen other people while we were still trying to figure out where the hell Diana was keeping you."
Through our bond, I felt Blake's fierce agreement as he started the engine, Asher's pride mixing with residual terror as he claimed shotgun. They were all trying so hard to be strong for me, to be the Alphas I needed them to be. But I could feel the cracks in their control, the way fear had carved itself into their bones during the hours I'd been missing.
They thought I was dead, I realized, the knowledge settling like lead in my stomach. When they couldn't feel me through the bond, when that fucking suppression collar cut us off from each other—they thought Diana had killed me.
"I felt you," I admitted quietly, watching the burning pharmaceutical plant recede in the side mirror. Orange flames licked at the night sky, and somewhere in that inferno, Diana was either dead or trapped. The thought should have brought satisfaction. Instead, all I felt was a bone-deep weariness. "When you were coming for me. Through our bond. It was... it kept me going."
Blake's hands tightened on the steering wheel hard enough that I heard the leather creak. "We should've been faster. Should've figured out where that bitch was keeping you sooner—"
"You found me." I cut him off before he could spiral into self-recrimination. God knew I had enough guilt for all of us—I didn't need them drowning in it too. "That's what matters. You didn't give up, and you found me."
Even though I gave you every reason to, I didn't add. Even though I pushed you away and told you I hated you and made it clear I'd rather freeze to death than accept your help.