Chapter 5: Jenny

I stood anxiously by their car, and took a peek through the window. It was so damn neat. The only reason Kurt’s was clean was because he had cleaners, me too. But I did tend to do a quick clean before they cleaned it.

Cleaners.

My life was about to become a lot different to what I’d been used to. I looked at the white backless dress which hung on me, with eyeliner and mascara all over it, thinking this was the only dress I possessed, and it was messed up. Just like my life.

“Penny for your thoughts?” Trent called out as he approached me.

He didn’t want to know because I could do with a penny, or even a dollar. The $100 Summer gave me wouldn’t get too far, and when I would have money again was a complete unknown. I had no idea what was going to happen to me. At eighteen, I had become nearly penniless, homeless and parentless. I had to face the fact my parents didn’t give a shit either. Something which had never crossed my mind until now. No one came to look for me at the country club, or even bothered to find out what was going on with me.

No one.

I saw on Twitter, Mom’s now with my aunt. But only Mom, not me.

“Right, let’s get you to JC Penny or something to get some clothes, then afterward we’ll head to the office.”

“Office?”

“Yeah, Mom said that she’ll see if maybe she can help you. She’ll see if she can get you some clothes and hopefully things. Sure, the FBI have frozen your account, but it doesn’t mean that you should be left out in the street.”

“Sure.”

I didn’t know what to say as the doors were unlocked and I opened the car. I climbed in the passenger side while Trent popped the trunk and stuffed his bag inside, then he came into the driver’s seat, and slammed the door shut.

“What does your mom do?”

I realized I knew nothing about him. Well, not since that fateful night five years ago when his dad died in the car accident.

“She’s a lawyer.”

He started the engine, and we were on our way as he started to pull back. I could refuse his offer of going shopping and say I would be alright, but I would be lying to not only him, but myself too.

“You sounded surprised when I said Mom was a lawyer.” He smiled as he looked at me. We finally left the parking lot and the place where my nightmare, the one I’d never forget, had begun.

“It’s only three. Who would have thought within two hours, our lives would change so much?”

He didn’t say a word but cleared his throat and changed the station on the radio.

“It’s just that we lost touch after the accident. Sorry, I didn’t mean to bring it up,” I whispered, breaking the silence. It was another moment I immediately regretted as the words left my mouth.

“It’s fine. It feels like forever ago. One minute, no one wanted to talk about it, then after a while, it was clear none of us were coping with Dad’s accident, so we had to talk about it with a therapist. Mom was a housewife, but she met Dad in law school, so she’d passed the bar and everything, but with triplets it was hard to keep a full-time job and be a mom at the same time.”

He turned down the radio while we were talking, encouraging the conversation to continue. I thought about what I’d just gone through, and it was bad, but not in comparison to him and his family.

“Anyway, when he died, she used the insurance money to get a house, with no home loan, and we’re doing alright. Not great. But alright.”

Why did I ever listen to Kurt?

The family picture Kurt painted of them was different to the one Trent was talking about right now. He said they were poor, dirt poor, and his mom was a slut. God, I never believed him, but I also never questioned why he called her names.

“Why, what did Kurt say to you?”

“How did you know?”

I wondered if I’d accidentally let it slip. But then I couldn’t have, because my lips were sealed tight as he spoke.

He shrugged, not taking his eyes off the road.

“We heard that he was talking shit about our dad, about our family. At one time it used to bug me, but now I don’t care. I just turn a blind eye to it.”

Back in first grade and middle school when we both went to the same places, Trent was always nice. Then afterward disappearing to a new school for a year—I’ve no idea why—he returned to the same high school as me. When he did, it was as if he didn’t even know who I was, then again, he’d been through so much I didn’t expect him to remember the girl that used to live next door to him. Even if it was for only a little while.

“We used to be neighbors.”

He shrieked. “What? Get out of here! When? How come I don’t remember?”

We were at the stop lights. “It was only for a few weeks. Your mom used to come over and we would play in the sand pit. The one you had out front. Then when Dad got his big promotion, we moved. This is when we moved neighborhoods and all of a sudden we were no longer average—we were rich.”

“Oh my God, why didn’t it ever click? Jenny Hampton. Of course! Only a few weeks, right?”

I nodded. I was wondering if it was the only part of the story that he remembered. “Yeah, I remember that sand pit.”

The one where I kissed you on the cheek and promised to love you forever.

“I think Mom donated it to charity or something. I can’t remember. I wonder if my brothers remember too?”

I shook my head. “No. They never wanted to play. They were never interested. It was just the two of us.”

He pointed his finger at me, and for a split second I wondered if he really did remember or if he was just making it up.

“Right!”

Then the awkward silence returned, and with it the confirmation in which he really didn’t remember our time together. It was silly, with everything going on in my life right now; it should have been the least of my worries.

“If your mom can help me get some things, I would be grateful. So far I have no money in my account, because they were joint accounts with Dad. He liked to keep tabs on my spending. I also have no phone line.”

“In his name?”

I took a deep breath, thinking about how pathetic my life was right now.

“Yep, and the house is locked up. I saw it on Instagram, one of the neighbor’s kindly posted it.”

“Oh, that was nice of them,” he said.

We both looked at each other and laughed.

“Don’t worry, Mom’s office is not far from JC Penny, so, I’ll let you shop and…”

“Help me choose of course?”

He hesitated as he pulled up into the parking lot.

“I’m not the fashion guru. That’s more Prent’s territory.”

I remembered Prent didn’t go to our school. I didn’t know why, but I felt as if I was interviewing Trent today. Now I was acting as if he was my best friend and trying to get to know him better. Too fast, too soon.

As he parked and stopped the engine, he unlocked the car. I took off my belt and opened the door. After spotting my reflection as I got out of the car, I didn’t want to go inside. I looked exactly as I imagined myself to look. My hair resembled a bird’s nest, and my lipstick and make up in none of the right places on my face. I was a mess. Not just a mess, but a disaster… which was exactly how I felt.

Bending over, looking in the side mirror, trying to make myself look normal, I stood as Trent approached after locking the car.

“You can go into the bathroom and wash your face if you like. I may have a spare brush…”

“I have one in my purse, don’t worry.”

“Cool.”

He smiled at me for a second, and I wondered if he’d really remembered me. As if he was going to say, yeah, we were supposed to get married, have kids and all that. The typical kid fantasy someone would have about someone like him.

“We need to get going. Mom’s waiting for you. I’ve got things to do later, before I work tomorrow.”

That was when it hit me, yes, today was Sunday. He had his schedule, his life, and I’d completely ruined it, and instead of appreciating all he’d done, I was upset about him not remembering me. I really needed to grow up.

“Right, let’s get going. Sorry, I’ve messed up your day. Your mom works on a Sunday?”

“She’s a workaholic. She says I take after her because I’m pretty much the same. Watch it!” he screamed at a car, which nearly ran me over as we were walking toward the mall.

He put his arm out so I wouldn’t get hit by the car. I didn’t see the car coming, because I was distracted watching him speak, admiring the way that he walked with confidence. And as for his body, just feeling the muscles on his arm, as I held on to it. It confirmed what I’d already suspected, which was that every part of him was perfect.

“Okay. Get yourself tidied up and then we’ll get something to eat. I heard your stomach just now. Didn’t see you eating much at lunch.”

I didn’t have much of an appetite. Who would have, having such a jerk of a boyfriend sitting next to them? Trent was sweet. I remembered him being an animal lover and wanting to take care of things all the time. I wondered again if he thought of me and the past, quickly shaking the image away. I had to get rid of this feeling, he was just being helpful. It was distracting me from thinking about my fate.

“In fact, you’ve lost a lot of weight.” Trent gasped, and it was as if he’d realized he’d said a little too much as he quickly shut his mouth.

My eyes darted away from him, and I remained quiet as we kept walking, biting my lips at the thought of him noticing my weight loss. Neither of my parents had noticed, and neither had Kurt. If anything, he’d told me to lose more weight, complaining I was fat all the time.

“I shouldn’t have said anything.”

“It’s not that. It’s just that Kurt said I was too fat. He said I needed to lose weight, and he would even go out of his way to buy a size zero saying I should fit into it.”

He paused. “Why the hell did you stay with that jerk?”

I nodded, knowing he was right. “It’s like a candy bar.” I motioned for us to keep moving as I felt as if all eyes were on me. “We know they’re bad for us. We could avoid eating them in the first place, that way we don’t have to excessively exercise or diet. Guilty indulgences we subject ourselves to and never know the reason why.”

He choked. “Are you comparing yourself to a candy bar?”

“No. I’m comparing myself to the feeling afterward, the guilt of knowing before I went down that road I shouldn’t have done it. Then, I'm left questioning why I did it.”

“Right.”

“You don’t get it?” I asked, feeling defensive and wondering how best to explain it to him.

He chuckled. “I really don’t. I get what you’re saying about candy, but it’s fine to eat one or two, just not every day and definitely not every hour. So, you eat it in moderation, because it tastes fucking good. You enjoy it. There’s nothing wrong with that. It becomes a problem when you eat it every hour, you put on excessive weight, your teeth start falling out and even worse, you feel like crap, ‘cause that’s what too much sugar does to you. Then you do it over and over again. It’s damaging, you know it, but you’re so damn far down the hole you don’t fucking care. You lie there in your own suffering, no more thinking how to get out. You can't. Until something big happens, and by then, it could be too late.”

I was fighting back the tears as I heard him talk about my life, and I could admit to him he was one hundred percent right. Dad said it would be good to be with Kurt. There was a time, a long time ago, when it stopped being fun, but I kept going on. Blaming Dad for being stuck, when really it was my own fault for not doing anything to stop being in something which had turned toxic.

“Shit, that was too much too soon. Look, can we stop talking about candy because now I’m feeling hungry. Let’s get something to eat. Like right now.” He gasped as if he needed to eat or he would just faint on the floor. “Papa John’s?”

“Sure,” I whispered, still trying to process what he’d said to me a few seconds ago.

He was a pizza lover too, just like me. Everything about being in his company and speaking to him felt right. I smiled as my stomach rumbled, knowing any minute it would be filled with pizza. Pepperoni, here I come.

After we finished eating, within no time we headed in the direction of JC. I had to shop differently, not the way I’d been used to doing it my whole life, picking things I liked instead of shopping and looking at the price tag. I decided a couple of pairs of jeans, some shirts, and maybe a dress or two would do it.

“Shoes, remember you can’t be walking around in those all day.”

The guilt of making him not only walk around with me, but getting more stuff, entered my mind.

I would pay him back!

As soon as this mess was over, I would give him double what he spent on me today. It was the only thing which helped me pick out sneakers and some low pumps. Damn, I could fill the car with clothes I wanted to buy and not what was in the basket.

“I’ll wait for you at the cashier,” he said, and I realized I was heading in the lingerie department.

Yeah, I didn’t want him tagging along to see me buy the most basic cotton bras and panties. I stuffed them in the basket and then headed toward Trent. I would pay him back for sure, all this was just temporary, until everything was sorted out. I was confident it had to be, because this was humiliating. As he held out his hand to pay for the clothes, shoes and underwear all belonging to me, I touched his arm and looked into his eyes.

“Thank you.”

He winked and whispered, “My pleasure. It’s great seeing that big smile on your pretty face.”

He had me not only smiling, but my nipples were hard the moment I touched his skin. My body was reacting to him in a big way. Sex should have been the last thing on my mind, but with him, it was all I could think about. Those lips, those abs, and most of all, those dimples that made me want to melt every time he graced me with a smile.