Chapter 97 - Their Cursed

As soon as I was under the blanket, my body turned off. I closed my sore eyes and fell asleep. As if the universe was determined to add insult to injury, my dreams were filled with images of the twins and the others I have grown to care about here in the Supernatural Realm, forgetting who I am.

When I did wake up, I didn’t feel like I had gotten much sleep at all. I blinked my eyes open to realize I was still alone in the bed. I tried smelling to see if they had come to bed at all, but my nose was still stuffed up from all the crying. The bed felt cold, even with the blanket around me. I had grown so used to their warmth around me; I didn’t like being cold. I sat up slowly, rubbing the sleep from my eyes. I wasn’t sure what time it was or if I was ready to face my mates, assuming they were still here.

There was shuffling as I sat up, and I turned my head to see them both standing by the couches, having stood up as I woke. I averted my gaze back to my hands in my lap. What do I even say to them after everything?

“Remi?” Calder said softly. My heart hurt. It was painful to think about yesterday. It was hard to accept that Carson had been right. My mind went back to my apartment in the Ordinary Realm, to Calder and I sitting in the garden. This was infinitely worse than I had ever imagined.

“Remi, please,” Cullen begged. My hands came up to the spots where they put their marks on me. I gave them all the power over my heart, and now, I sat here with pieces.

The bed dipped to one side of me, then the other. I didn’t move a muscle, just stared down into my lap. They both reached forward and grabbed one of my hands. I felt the sparks from their touch, but they were weak. I felt my eyes watering again, and I wanted to curse them. I didn’t want to cry anymore.

“Baby, we messed up in the worst possible way,” Calder whispered.

“We could never tell you how sorry we are,” Cullen continued.

“We had no idea what you were feeling all this time,” Calder said.

“When you came out of the closet last night, we finally felt it all. We would have never let it go on so long if we knew….” Cullen said.

Calli was a whimpering mess in my head. She was hurt by what they did, too but also wanted their comfort more than anything. I don’t understand how they didn’t know. Even if they were ignoring me, shouldn’t they have felt it through our bond? There were so many times they came running before because they thought something was wrong.

“Please just look at us,” Calder implored. I couldn’t help but think this would just be easier if they would go back to work and continue to ignore me. If I stopped hoping for their attention or presence, I wouldn’t be so disappointed all the time.

A hand grabbed my chin softly and tilted my head up. I was looking right into Calder’s face. His expression was full of exhaustion and concern. “Please don’t hide from us. Not now,” he pleaded softly. I just blinked, trying to keep tears from springing up. “We won’t go anywhere. We won’t leave you.”

I’ll be up in a bit.

I will come to find you for dinner.

It won’t be more than a couple of minutes.

We’ll be back this afternoon.

So many empty promises. I felt helpless looking into his face. Yesterday, I wanted nothing more than just a tiny part of their day, just enough to feel connected to them again. I wanted them to know how thankful I was to have them now, how fortunate I felt to be given such an amazing family. Now, it didn’t really feel like they were mine.

Calder's eyes were clouded with emotion, and I could feel his remorse. It was mixing with the heartache inside me and creating an unpleasant heaviness in my stomach. I closed my eyes and felt my chin tremble while I tried to keep the tears inside. I felt his forehead lean against mine. “Baby, don’t cry. We were so wrong. Just let us fix it,” he implored softly. I didn’t move or answer him. After a moment, I felt myself being lifted. Then I was in his lap, and he was cradling me close to his chest. My body moved on its own. My face turned into his chest while my hand came up and gripped his shirt tightly. I couldn't smell him properly, but my shoulders relaxed as his arms tightened around me. Calli started to calm down too.

He didn’t move for what felt like a long time. Slowly, my limbs began to feel heavy again. I just kept my eyes closed and held onto him. Finally, he moved. I felt another pair of arms coming around me, pulling me away from Calder. I didn’t loosen my grip as I was moved from one mate to the other. They didn’t fight me, either. Cullen held me close to him now, his lips coming to the top of my head in a gentle kiss. I gripped his shirt in my other hand while still holding onto Calder.

The weight in my stomach wasn’t disappearing. Lethargy was settling in as we sat there. I could feel little beads of warmth at the corner of my eyes, but I kept them shut.

Calder

Remi fell asleep clinging to both of us. She wouldn’t speak to us, but she let us hold her. Neither of us could take our eyes off her. We were far from forgiven, but it was a start. When she walked out of the closet last night, we felt everything all at once. It felt like being drowned in a tidal wave of despair. It made no sense that we hadn’t felt anything sooner.

I watched my precious mate sleep next to me. Finally, her features were relaxed, and her face was losing the puffiness that erupted from her tears. I reached over and stroked her hair softly while Cullen thrummed his fingers along her spine. I wish I knew what she was thinking. I felt a pang of guilt every time I sent her away in the past couple of weeks, but merging packs was far more work than we anticipated. Cullen and I wanted to get the process done as quickly as possible. We took her for granted in the meantime.

There was a small knock on the door before it opened slowly. Pip came into the room carrying a tray of food. It was still early for breakfast, but she had to have been thinking of Remi. When she spotted us in the bed holding Remi, she scowled. She walked towards the couch and left the tray on the coffee table.

“I’m furious at you two,” she linked. She stood across the room, crossing her arms with her hip jutted out to the side. Exactly how she did when she was little.

“We know how bad this is, okay?” I tried to tell her. Gentry, our mother, and Carson had already given us an earful about the matter.

“It’s not just her you have been ignoring either. She just got the worst of it,” she shot at us. I looked at Cullen to see if he knew what she meant.

“What do you mean, Pip?” he asked her.

“I found my second chance, and Carson brought his boyfriend to Thanksgiving,” she snapped. My eyes went wide. What? “Yes, I found my second chance mate less than a week ago. I wanted you to meet him yesterday! Gen and my parents aren’t the only important people in my life, idiots. And Remi actually convinced your brother to step out of hiding, at least from you two. Even he came to Thanksgiving because Remi asked him. Carson decided it was time he finally talked to you guys about his chosen mate because he knew he had Remi’s support, and she promised to convince you guys to help him.”

My mind was spinning. So much was going on all around us, and we had been so ignorant. Pip got a second chance mate, and my brother is gay.

“Pip, we are so sorry. Let us make it up to Remi, and then we would really like to meet him,” I apologized. She shook her head.

“I love you both like my brothers, but part of me hopes she doesn’t forgive you. She’s stronger than any of us. I was left alone one night and crumbled to pieces. She is actually marked by you and survived all this time on scraps of your affection.” With that, she turned and quietly stormed from the room, closing the door behind her. Clearly, we had a lot more to make up for than I thought.

-

I didn’t realize, but I dozed off at some point while watching Remi sleep. I was sleeping very little as it was, then we stayed up all night watching her. When I woke up, I immediately realized that Remi wasn’t in bed anymore. I shot up, looking around. Cullen also fell asleep because he was still lying where he was earlier. My eyes went to the other side of the room. Remi was sitting on the couch, leaned over the backside, looking out the window. Soft light was coming in through the window, making her look soft and ethereal.

I pushed myself out of bed and walked over towards her. She didn’t move from her position as I approached. “You don’t have to stay with me….” she in a barely audible whisper. It was like she stabbed me. I closed the distance between us and kneeled down in front of her. I placed my hands on her legs that were curled up on the couch.

“I’m not going anywhere. Neither of us are,” I whispered. She turned her face to me, and her expression was acid in my throat. I reached up and cupped her cheek, softly rubbing my thumb against her soft skin and wishing I wasn’t the cause of her despair.

“I thought the worst thing that could happen was you walking away and leaving me shattered. I was wrong,” her voice cracked. Her chin trembled, and I could feel her about to cry again. I wrapped my arms around her and pulled her close to me.

“I am so sorry. I will never do it again,” I cradled her to me, trying to make sure there was no space between us. Her hands fisted in my shirt, but she didn’t push me away. “I need you, Remi. None of my reasons justify my actions. I swear I will never let you down like this again.”

She was quiet for a few minutes before her cracking voice sounded against me, “I missed you so much. Please don’t leave me alone.” It was a plea. I didn’t know if we were forgiven, but she wasn’t pushing us away, and that was what was important right now.

“I won’t. You are my world. I won’t do it ever again,” I swore.

“Let me have her,” Cullen linked as he sunk down next to us silently. I loosened my arms slightly, and Remi looked up at me then at Cullen. When he opened his arms, she let go of me and moved to him. He wrapped her in his arms; I couldn’t help but notice how small and fragile she looked. He kissed the top of her head, murmuring similar words to my own as he tried to reassure her that we would be better for her.

Gentry

My best friends are total idiots. I cannot believe their complete lack of consideration for the best thing in their life. After hanging up the phone with Calder last night, I didn’t even want to see them. Carson and Luna were with me in the kitchen packing away all the leftovers when Calder finally called me back. I know they heard everything I said to them. When I hung up, I excused myself and went to my room. I didn’t know how Remi was right then or how she would be when they finally got to her.

I was hanging on by a thread. Between all the work surrounding the pack mergers and being worried about Remi, the only thing that kept me getting out of bed every morning was Sam. Sam, and my pup. I was going to be a father and needed to do everything in my power to keep it together for them. I wondered how long it was going to take her to be ready. I wanted her here with me. It made me want to punch my best friends too. Their mate was right here, waiting for them, silently begging them to notice her.

When I got to my room, I pulled my tie off and tossed it on the dresser. I started unbuttoning my shirt when I noticed an envelope sitting there. Curiosity flared, and I picked it up. When I turned it over, my name was there in Sam’s writing. I held my breath as I ripped open the envelope and desperately scanned the page.