Chapter 10: The Instincts

Ronan POV

The serum didn’t just fail. It burned.

I could feel it under my skin, a low, crawling heat that refused to fade. My breathing was uneven. My hands wouldn’t stop shaking. I’d tried taking another dose, but the vial slipped from my grip, shattered across the floor, and now the room smelled like metal and smoke.

“Control yourself,” I muttered under my breath, gripping the edge of the desk. “You can control it.”

Except I couldn’t. My heartbeat was too loud. My scent was wild, it was spilling into the air like a warning I couldn’t silence. I clenched my jaw until it hurt, but even that didn’t stop the pull in my chest, the ache behind my ribs.

Then, soft footsteps stopped at my door.

“Ronan?”

Elias’s voice.

No. Not now.

I swallowed hard. “Go back to your room.”

He didnt answer. The door creaked open just enough for his scent to reach me, vanilla, a little like rain. It hit like lightning.

He stepped in, hesitant but stubborn as always. “Luca said he heard something break. I came to….”

“Elias,” I warned, my tone sharper than I meant. “Leave.”

He froze. “You’re bleeding.”

I glanced down. There was blood smeared across my knuckles where the glass had cut. I hadn’t even noticed. He took a step closer, ignoring every line of tension in my shoulders.

“Sit,” he said quietly. “I’ll get a towel.”

“I said don’t come closer.”

He hesitated again, but then his eyes softened, like he didn’t believe I could actually hurt him. “You look like you’re in pain, Ronan.”

His voice cracked something in me.

“I’m fine,” I lied. My throat felt raw. “Just… please, Elias. Go.”

He shook his head. “No.”

That one word. Small. Stupid.It ruined me.

The air shifted the moment he got closer. I could feel it, our scents tangling, too strong. My instincts surged before I could fight them. Every nerve in my body screamed to touch him, claim him, and I hated myself for it.

“Elias….” I started, but he reached out, pressing the towel against my hand. His fingers brushed my skin.

And that was all it took, a low sound tore from my throat. It wasn’t human..I stepped back fast, but the room spun. My heartbeat roared in my ears. Elias gasped softly, he was terr8fied, but he didn’t move away.

“What’s wrong?” he whispered.

“You need to get out.” My voice came out rough and shaking. “Now.”

He frowned, confused and worried. “You’re scaring me.”

Good. Maybe that would make him leave. But he didn’t.

Instead, he said, “Then tell me what’s happening. Please.”

My restraint snapped. One second I was across the room, the next my hand was on the wall beside his head, the other gripping his wrist, but it was not hard, but firm enough that he stilled. His breath caught, his pulse fluttering under my fingers.

His eyes widened. “Ronan…”

The sound of his name on his lips almost undid me. I leaned in before I could stop myself, close enough to feel the tremor in his chest. The scent of him, soft, sweet, pure wrapped around me until I couldn’t breathe.

“I told you not to come here,” I said, my voice low, hoarse. “You shouldn’t be this close.”

“Then let me go,” he whispered.

I did, instantly, stepping back like I’d been burned. My body ached from holding back what it wanted to do. My claws, half-shifted, had left faint marks on the wall.

He stared at me, his eyes were full of something I didn’t want to name. Fear. Confusion. Maybe pity.

And I hated it.

“You need to understand,” I said, forcing each word out. “The Alpha suppressants aren’t working. I can’t control it. If I hurt you…”

“You won’t,” he said softly.

“You don’t know that.”

“I do.” He took a slow breath, his voice barely heard. “Because you’re still fighting it. Even now.”

Something inside me twisted painfully. I wanted to believe him. But my instincts didn’t care about belief. They cared about him.

The pull between us thickened. I could hear his heartbeat, smell the nervous rush in his scent. My fingers curled at my sides, nails digging into my palms.

“Stop looking at me like that,” I said, but it came out almost like a plea.

“Like what?”

“Like you’re not afraid.”

He stepped closer again. “Because I’m not.”

That was the breaking point.

In a flash, I pinned him to the wall again. This time, he didn’t fight me. His breath hitched, and for a second, we just stood there, too close, too aware. My forehead rested against his, my breathing harsh. I could feel the heat from his skin, the way it made every part of me scream for control.

“Ronan…” he whispered, his voice trembling.

“Don’t,” I said. “Don’t say my name right now.”

His hand lifted slightly, like he wanted to touch my face but stopped halfway. “You’re shaking.”

I forced myself to pull away. Every movement felt like tearing muscle from bone. I turned, stepping back until my back hit the opposite wall. My lungs were burning. The scent between us was heavy, thick with something forbidden.

He looked at me, his eyes wide, and his lips parted, trying to make sense of what just happened.

“Elias,” I said quietly, still breathing hard. “If you stay, I will lose control.”

He hesitated, then nodded slowly. He turned and walked toward the door, pausing once before leaving. His voice was small, but it carried enough to break me.

“I don’t think you’ll hurt me, Ronan. But I think you’re hurting yourself.”

The door closed softly behind him. And silence erupted.

For a long moment, I just stood there, every nerve shaking. The ache didn’t fade. The bond I was trying to bury clawed its way higher, stronger. I slammed my fist into the desk, and the wood cracked under the force.

“Dammit!”

The mirror on the wall caught my reflection, gold eyes, dilated pupils, the raw, exposed truth of what I was. What I couldn’t hide anymore.

I hated the person staring back at me.

With a roar, I swung my arm. The mirror shattered into a thousand glittering pieces, scattering across the floor like broken glass stars.

My breathing slowed, but the wildness inside me didn’t fade. I could still feel Elias’s warmth against my skin. And that terrified me more than anything.