Chapter 10 Consequences
Lyra
I desperately want to go back to the site of the ambush to check on our effectiveness–but that would be extremely dangerous. For the next few days, I debate whether or not I should try to sneak through the forest to check to see if there is any carnage.
“They will remove the dead and wounded,” Jorin reminds me as I pace through the front door in my human form. We’ve eaten breakfast, so it’s time for us to go train. I made it through yesterday without my running off to the place where we set the trap. Today, I have a feeling it’ll be a lot harder.
He’s right, though. “How will we know if we even accomplished anything?” I ask, irritated, but not at him.
“I guess we’ll have to hope Bram updates us soon,” Jorin says with a shrug. “It might be safe to go in a few weeks to see if there’s any evidence that we were successful.”
“Fine. Are you ready to go train?” I ask him, folding my arms across my chest.
Jorin lets out a small laugh and shakes his head. “You are too much sometimes, Lyra. Patience is not a virtue you come by naturally, but you must learn it. We can’t expect to defeat a powerful Alpha in only a day or two. It may take us years to bring him down.”
“Years?” My eyebrows shoot up to the top of my head. “You’ve got to be kidding. No, I can’t wait that long. He needs to be stopped now before more innocent packs are obliterated, before more innocent members of Running River Pack have their lives ruined by that tyrant.”
Nodding, Jorin says, “Yes, Lyra. I understand that. Believe me, I’ve spent many a night out here in the woods dreaming of the same sort of vengeance you thirst for now. But it will not come overnight, and if we are not careful, it will not come at all. Showing up at the scene of the crime to see our handiwork will only make the situation worse. We must bide our time and await the next opportunity. If Bram wasn’t accidentally one of our victims, he will likely report back to us in a day or two.”
I listen carefully to Jorin and accept everything he has to say, but when he mentions the potential that Bram might’ve been harmed—or worse—at our hand, panic wells up inside of me. That was never my intention, nor would I have done what I did if I had considered that possibility. I assumed he wouldn’t tell us to ambush the army if he was going with them. I know he’s integral to the army right now and that he’s using that position to get in Kaelen’s ear and report to us, but I just assumed he’d be staying back at the village.
What if he didn’t? What if he’s injured or worse?
And it’s my fault?
I’ve been accused of murdering a person whom I truly respected, but I can’t stand the idea of being responsible for Bram’s death. I can accept killing other members of Kaelen’s army because I know they all answer directly to him. None of them think for themselves. Nor do they care at all that I was convicted of a heinous crime I didn’t commit and sentenced, essentially, to death.
Yet, thinking about the aftermath of the ambush in that light causes me to have to think about what we’ve done differently.
“Are you all right?” Jorin asks, placing a hand on my arm to steady me.
“Yes, I’m fine,” I reply, but it’s not necessarily true. “We probably killed people, Jorin.”
“Hopefully,” he says with a nod. “That was the point.”
“No, I know. I do, too. But… it’s just difficult to think about the actual deaths that may have occurred. Those warriors probably have families–wives and children.”
“And so do the people in the villages they are attacking and decimating,” he reminds me. “You’ve seen the bodies in the village where we collect supplies. Kaelen and his warriors have not spared women and children. So if we took out even a few of them, we’re doing the work of the Moon Goddess. I pray every night that She will guide my steps and help me get vengeance for those that have been wronged. It’s normal for you to feel that way, especially when it’s the first person you’ve killed.”
That gains my attention for a completely different reason. “You’ve killed before?”
“Out here, you have to do what you have to do, dear. Rogues attack sometimes, Lyra. I had to defend myself.”
I nod. That makes sense. “Did you ever kill anyone when you were in the army?”
He slowly shakes his head. “I refused. We attacked other packs, and I said I wouldn’t kill innocent people. I was the only one at the time who said no. That’s why I got targeted by the Alpha, and that’s how I know that anyone who died yesterday deserved it.”
“That must’ve been very difficult for you,” I say. “I’m sorry you had to go through that. I wish others would’ve been brave enough to stand up with you.”
“They’re bloodthirsty bastards. If we are to overthrow Kaelen and place the rightful heir on the throne, we will also have to cut out all the bad blood and recreate the entire army from the ground up. Anyone who is loyal to him has to go.”
My mouth moves for a moment with no words coming out. He said so much in just a few moments. The rightful heir? Rebuilding the army from the ground up?
“Right now, I think we need to focus on stopping any more attacks against innocent packs and getting Alpha Kaelen out of power, I say. “Hopefully, we can kill him. But then… I wouldn’t mind seeing him suffer some first.”
He laughs. “I agree. So, let’s do it. But we won’t be able to strike again if we get ourselves killed nosing around where we can be pretty sure Kaelen’s forces will be hanging out for the next few weeks–if what we did was successful.”
“All right then. We’ll just have to hope Bram comes through with us–soon.” I take a deep breath and say, “Now, let’s go train.”
“Sounds good to me.”
We separate, shift, and take off for a nearby meadow, and I feel better about waiting to find out if we did any damage, but it’s still hard to concentrate. I hope we made a dent in Kaelen’s forces, but most of all, I hope Bram is okay.