Chapter 21: Twenty one

Karina's pov

I staggered through the dark confused I wasn't sure where I was yet, but after a few more minutes of running in the dark i finally recognized where I was and was able to trace my way back to my people.

By the time I reached the outer area, the fight was still ongoing; it seemed the other side had moved back to regroup.

It was dark now, meaning I was going for about 6 hours.

I stepped into the chaos without hesitation.

“Karina!” Drake’s voice cut through the noise.

“I’m fine, let's get back, we can't give them time to regroup fully,” I yelled. We regrouped quickly and pushed back harder.

I instructed my troops to follow a new line of attack and defense. We attacked and didn’t hold back.

My new method of approach was risky; it could either give us the chance to win or deliver us into the hands of enemies on a platter of gold.

I moved through the crowd, attacking the strongest soldiers on either side, making sure I wasn't lured out this time.

"Ahhh." The last of the top soldiers yelled in pain as I pressed my sword through his heart.

After that, the fight ended faster than it started.

One by one, the rest of their soldiers fell, until there was no one left standing against us.

I stood in silence watching the battlefield, the ground was soaked with the blood of our enemy, and a few of our fallen soldiers.

I instructed them to gather the bodies of our fallen soldiers; they deserved to be buried in their home soil.

Drake walked up beside me, eyeing me carefully. “You disappear for so long and decide to come back dramaticly and led us to victory.”

I almost smiled.

“Had to make an entrance,” I replied, laughing.

He shook his head. “You’re insane. I was worried there for a second. I thought we lost you. Should've known you'd find a way out.”

“Have a little faith in me next time, okay,” I said, smiling.

"Do you always have to be thus cocky?" He asked,d laughing.

I smiled back and moved to pay respects to the fallen.

This was harder than I expected, but at least we won, and I was alive.

That was enough.

I stood still for a moment, letting everything settle.

The fight.

The near loss.

The way things could have ended differently, for me and for everyone here.

This made me realize something about life.

It was so fragile and unpredictable.

Things could be going so well for you one second, only for it to be turned upside down the next.

One wrong move, and everything changes.

I looked down at my hands briefly; they were red, stained with blood, but they were still here.

I was lucky to be still standing out here; nothing was guaranteed.

Not time. Not people. Nothing

It left me with the reality of things: if I cared about something, I couldn’t keep pretending I didn't.

Because life doesn't wait, it takes things from you, even before you realize how much you need them. It takes people before you work up the courage to tell them how much you love them.

I wasn't going to let life take from people before I atleast tried to go after what my heart wants.

If I lose then I'll be consoled by the fact that I tried and not haunted by the fact I never did.

We finished securing the area not long after, making sure there were no survivors left behind and no loose ends that could come back to haunt us later. Everything had been handled cleanly and efficiently, exactly the way it was supposed to be, and for once, things had gone according to plan.

“The areas are clear,” one of the commanders yelled out.

I nodded. Finally, we can start moving.

“Good. Regroup. We leave in ten.” I commmanded.

They moved immediately. I could tell the loss of our soldiers burdened them, but they still moved with a level of discipline and loyalty. I stood watching them, feeling a sense of satisfaction. All our endless mornings of training had paid off, we were lucky to be alive, but our victory was as a result of our hardwork,

As I stood there, something shifted inside me. Before I came here, I told myself I didn't need to return, that my story at the pack was finished and closed, and it was time to move.

I realize now that decision came from a place of hurt and pride, from the painful realization that I wanted something I may never have.

But just because I may never be anything to Kole, doesn't mean that. This place… these people, didn't mean anything to me, or I didn't matter to them.

They weren’t temporary to me anymore, and neither was I to them. I've always longed for a home, and now I have one. I wasn't going to let my hurt lead me to run away from it. Not this time.

The journey back felt quiet. It wasn't an uncomfortable way, though; it felt reflective and grateful. Most of the troops were relaxed now, talking in low voices, some recounting stories about the brothers we lost.

Drake sat beside me quietly for sometime.

“You’ve been in your head all morning,” he said casually.

I didn’t look at him, I didn't feel like lying today. “I’m always in my head,” I replied faintly.

He let out a short laugh, while shaking his head. “Yeah, that's true, but not like this.”

I sighed slowly, debating whether to say anything at all. But if I don't ask questions, how will I ever get the answers I'm looking for, without looking at him? I spoke.

“What do you know about Kole?” I asked in a lowered voice.

“Depends on what you want to know and also why the sudden curiosity,” he replied carefully.

“Just answer,” I said, my tone neutral.

Drake stayed quiet for some minutes, like he was weighing his words before finally speaking.

“He wasn’t always like this,” he said.

“Then why the change?” i asked.

“He used to be, what's the word, he used to be easier, I guess,” Drake continued. "Don't get me wrong, he has always been serious, still a leader, but not this closed off.”

“ But he changed after someone he loved died,” he said finally.

"Who?" I asked.

"From what I heard, he was once chosen by the Moon Goddess as a divine mate, but when an Alpha council killed his fated mate, he rejected the moon’s command and took his vengeance, shattering the sacred order. I guess he still feels some regret that he couldn’t save her.”

I didn’t respond immediately. It all made sense now. How he acted, the distance he put. His love for control. The way he acts whenever I get close, how he pulls back like he had touched something dangerous.

The look on his face after he kissed me. It wasn't disgust; it was fear. He was scared for me.

“i get it now, that’s why he doesn’t get close to anyone,” I said.

Drake nodded. “Exactly.”

“Thanks,” I replied. I could feel my chest getting tighter; I couldn't continue this conversation even if I tried.

Drake looked at me like he wanted to ask more, but he didn’t. And I was grateful for that.

\---

After hours of journeying back, we finally reached the pack.

The gates opened before we even fully approached, and the moment we stepped inside, we were met with cheers from the crowd that was gathered outside.

“They heard,” Drake said beside me.

“News travels fast, I guess,” I replied.

People gathered quickly, clapping, calling out our success. The man stood, watching with pride, while the women and children danced and sang songs of victory.

“You did it!” one yelled.

“Clean win!”

“About time!” another yelled.

I nodded occasionally, acknowledging them without stopping, but I could feel the effect of it on me; I could tell now that they weren’t looking at me like an outsider anymore.

I wasn't temporary to these people, I felt my heart warm at this realization.

As I watched, I felt it, the familiar pull from my wolf stirring.

I lifted my gaze and found him immediately.

Kole stood at a distance from us. He wasn’t celebrating like the others; he was observing, as he always did.

Suddenly, our eyes met briefly; this time, it didn't hurt like before. There was understanding in my eyes now.

I didn't hate him anymore, I couldn't. Not now that I understand why he is the way he is.

I understand why he pulled away now.

Why did he call it a mistake?

Why did he look at me like that?

It didn’t erase what happened, but it changed how I saw it.

He looked away first, like he always did, retreating into that space he kept between himself and everyone else, and this time I didn't feel hurt by it.

My heart bleeds for him, I refuse to add to his pain.

I looked away and allowed myself to soak in the victory of the battle we just won.

I moved around, accepting gifts and hugs from pack members.

It warmed my heart to know that I meant something to these people.

After a few more minutes of greeting the pack members, I slowly walked back to my room, my heart full.

I needed to rest; the battle was over, but my work wasn't over. Tomorrow was going to be a long day.