Victoria's pov
Three weeks flew by a little too fast that I didn't even notice. Everything was happening so quickly. The pack was getting ready for another barbecue and Ashley's 'induction' was being planned.
Her observation period practically ended since the first week she came; they had no real reason not to trust her. Apparently due to the mate bond, Caleb would be able to detect if she was being dishonest when she told us the rest of her story.
Since then, Emma, Ashley and I have become like the power puff girls. We were almost always together that Caleb was starting to get jealous.
Turns out, Ashley is the total opposite of Emma and I. When I first met her, I totally misjudged her personality. Instead of being the bold, sassy person I thought she was, she was actually really quiet and sweet. Not saying that Emma and I aren't sweet, but she was like a baby.
Mama bear even stopped giving me death glares. She gave simple greetings the few times when she came around. She even asked me to help the ladies with the barbecue. I still don't trust her, but it was nice to know I wasn't surrounded by wolves that hate me.
Things have been practically going great, and Luka and I went back to normal after a week or so. I started going to his room again to chat and eat late night snacks.
We didn't mention the kiss, ex boyfriends or his mate. We just simply acted like none of it happened. Actually, he acted like nothing happened, I just went along with it since we were back to normal.
I, on the other hand, had other plans. I tried finding out more about Ella, but every effort was made null. Anytime I asked someone, they would get tense and say 'It's not their story to tell', which I understood but ugh.
But I had a plan which I was executing at this very moment.
Hearing the bell to the diner's door ring, I snapped my head up with a smile when I saw Lincoln walking through. He made his way to me with a confused look on his face.
I left him a note in a place that only he would find, telling him to meet me here at one. I knew he would call and ask why, so I wrote that it's very important and can only be discussed face to face. I also told him that he should run here, since I had to drive.
I knew he was the only one who would come without questioning my request.
"What's wrong Victoria?" He asked, seeming worried. I gave him a guilty smile because I knew he was probably worried as hell.
"I wanted to talk about... " I trailed, giving him a sweet apologetic look. "Ella". I squeaked, turning my head to the side.
He gave me a look that I dreaded getting the whole time I waited here.
"Victoria I told you before that-"
"I know it's not your story to tell, but come on please." I pleaded with puppy dog eyes. "I think we both know I'm not going anywhere anytime soon, and I can't live with the suspense."
"So ask him. I'm not telling you like this. He'll kill me Vic, you're obviously not right in the head."
"If you think I'm sane, you just don't know me well enough," I stated nonchalantly. He just stared at me like I was indeed insane.
"Okay look Lincoln, I won't tell him that you told me." I tried to reason with him but he just shook his head saying no.
Well, time for plan B.
I'm a terrible person for this but here it goes.
I buried my head in my hands, sniffling a few times till I felt the tears fall. Smiling victoriously, I held my head up for him to see my fake tears, molding my face in a hurt expression. I saw his eyes soften as he took in my face. Yes!
"Victoria what's wrong?" He asked calmly, holding my hands for 'comfort'. I sniffled.
"You see Lincoln, I've never really had a family. Since I met you guys, I finally felt like I belonged, even though the situation is complicated" I stared in his eyes as I continued.
This was actually the truth. I just never intended on using it as a tool to get what I wanted.
"I actually like Luka" I whispered, making the tears fall more. I saw his face light up, and he looked way happier than I expected.
"You do?" He asked excitedly, and I nodded with another sniff.
"But three weeks ago, we kissed and he called Ella's name instead of mine.."
I carefully told him what happened that day and the day after, leaving out certain intimate details. I even told him that her name was the first thing he said when he saw me for the first time ever.
Slowly but surely, this act was getting too real. I realized the tears were falling willingly instead of by force. He looked torn as I continued.
"I just" *Sniff* "Wanna know" *Sniff sniff* "If I should invest more" *Sniff* "In him"
I didn't once think about it this way. I was too hell bent on finding out what happened, that I didn't think about how it was affecting me.
"It's hard you know? I don't know where I'm at in this situation and it hurts"
My voice cracked at the end and he came beside me, putting a comforting hand around my shoulders. I leaned my head on him as I finished pouring out three weeks of bottled up emotions.
"All my life I've had people walk out on me, and I don't think I can bear that again. I've spent years building up this wall that one man managed to start breaking in such a short time." I sighed. "Lincoln I just wanna know the truth" I made eye contact with him again. "I just want to know who she is, why she left and if she's coming back"
"She's not coming back," he said calmly.
"And even if she doesn't, am I gonna forever be in her shadow Lincoln? Will he ever even look at me even half the way he looked at her? I just wanna know Lincoln" I admitted, feeling defeated.
It wasn't about my nosiness again. I just used that as an excuse to get answers for what my heart really wanted to know.
Is it worth it?
"I just wanna know if I should stay or if I should leave" I closed my eyes as more tears fell. My voice was cracking and I felt completely vulnerable. Something I haven't been in a while.
"No you can't leave Victoria" Lincoln whispered, looking pained.
"And why the hell not Lincoln?" I asked, getting frustrated. These damn tears were giving me a headache.
"Because...." He sighed. "Look Vic, you're more important to Luka than you know. You're important to us"
"Why is that? I noticed all of you seemed more attached to me than usual, I'm not blind. But what's so important about me?"
I was genuinely curious. Even when they warmed up to me, they didn't start acting too attached until three weeks ago.
"I- I can't tell you" He uttered. Of freaking course!
"More secrets." I breathed out irritated. "See Lincoln this is what I cannot do. I know this much of y'all secrets yet I don't even know half of it. I'm not telling you guys to take me in and tell me everything, but if I'm gonna feel uncomfortable then I can't stay"
"No you hav-"
"I don't have to do anything Lincoln. If I stay I'll just get even more invested and then it'll hurt too much when he constantly chooses her. And I'm not being bitter, I know what mates mean to you guys. I just wanna know the truth, so I can have proper closure if I need to" I ended with a sigh as I gently wiped my tears with a napkin.
He sat silent for a minute, as if he didn't know what to do. I suddenly felt bad for guilt tripping him. But on another hand, I'm glad I did.
This whole quest wasn't just because I was nosey. That probably accounted for 40% of the reason. The big reason was I needed clarity. The truth is, I just wanted to know how important she is to him, and if there can ever be a chance with us.
If there isn't, I'll just leave. Not out of bad spirit, but I know if I stayed, I would fall too deep and get hurt.
And I'm not going through that again.
So yes, that's the real reason I was so invested in Ella. I'm scared of getting hurt. I finally admitted it to myself.
I've become so vulnerable to this man, that I gave him a tool that he can use to crush me with just one word.
Ella.
I was so lost in my thoughts that I didn't even remember that Lincoln was sitting beside me, regarding me with so much concern. I didn't like it.
I don't like to be like this, especially around people. It's a good thing it's Sunday and the diner is almost empty.
We sat in comfortable silence for a couple more minutes. I wasn't gonna pressure him to tell me any longer. My cover was blown.
He rubbed my shoulders reassuringly, and I'm sorta glad that he was the one that was here. Emma, being Emma wouldn't have known what to do, and Caleb would've been acting awkward. Ashley obviously doesn't know anything and Luka... Well we all know that story.
"I'll be right back. I'm gonna make a phone call" he announced softly, and I simply nodded in response.
I watched him through the glass window as he talked to the other person on the line. It seemed like the conversation was heated, as he ran his hand through his perfectly wavy hair too many times.
After what seemed like forever, he appeared back inside, but he took his original seat, since I calmed down a bit.
"Victoria" He said carefully, and I gave him a weird look. "As I said, it was never my story to tell, and I respect Luka's privacy" He explained and I nodded in understanding. It was wrong of me to try and use my emotions against him in the first place. Even if it led to the clarity my heart needed.
"But I do believe you should know what happened, so I called Luka and he's on his way"
He seemed tense, like he expected me to erupt, but I was grateful. Luka was the person I wanted to hear it from since day one, he just didn't want to.
"Thank you Lincoln" I smiled genuinely. I'm glad we had this meeting. It didn't turn out how I intended, but it was more than okay.
"Don't mention it. I just have one favour to ask though" He seemed nervous as I urged him to continue. He held my hand across the table.
"No matter what happens, please don't leave. It will all make sense soon, but we can't lose you. Please"
The look in his eyes tore me. I don't know why, but this seemed really important to them. Can I do to them what everybody in my life has ever done to me? When I'm obviously this important to them? I don't think so.
I, of all persons, knew the hurt that it can bring, and I won't do it to them.
"I won't leave," I told him honestly as I placed my other hand on top of his. "You have my word"
He beamed at me, and I felt my heart soar at his happy face. I felt like a mom who just told her child he can get the new Xbox.
A throat clearing broke us out of our little 'moment' and we both turned to see the one and only Luka in all his glory. He seemed upset and at first I assumed it was because of what they talked about on the phone. Then I noticed his eyes were trained on our hands so gently tucked them away, and he relaxed. He gave Lincoln a bro hug uttering thanks, as he left to go back home I guess. Luka took his spot.
"How did you even get here this fast?" I asked.
"I was already in the territory searching for you since you left without telling me, when I got a call that you were here, I just ran the rest of the way"
"Oh."
After a long pause, he sighed. "I'm sorry about everything Victoria. I didn't know you were affected by my actions this much" He muttered as I met his eyes. He looked sincere.
"I didn't consider your feelings towards all of this until Lincoln told me you were crying" Lincoln told him I cried!? Of course he did.
"It shouldn't have gone to the point where you had to go to someone else for clarity and I'm sorry. It's just that, it's all still so fresh to me and all these new feelings and everything just confused me." He ended and I nodded, not finding the energy to speak.
"But I'm ready to tell you anything you want to know. I can't bare knowing that you're hurt because of me" I met his eyes at that, shocked that he actually admitted that. "So what do you want to know?" He asked. I sighed as I met his intense gaze once more.
"Everything.”