Chapter 20

*Natalie*

I rush behind her down the darkened hallway. My eyes shift around, bouncing off the hallway walls, adjusting to the dark. The music is getting quieter now, and I hear the padding of our shoes along the carpeted hallway.

We slow down a bit, catching our breath as we walk.

“Where are we going?” I ask.

“Away from Vanessa and Soraya…” She smiles and looks into my eyes. She knew. “They can be a bit much.”

I breathe a sigh of relief. Vanessa and Soraya were a *bit much* to say the least…

She turns down a corner, leading us further into the dark hallways.

“I’ve got a fun place I want to show you,” She says, her brown eyes twinkling despite the darkness. I nod, entranced by her. And I laugh at her enthusiasm. Even through all of my chaos tonight, how close I came to the edge of that black hole after Zane’s revelation, she has me laughing. Having fun.

And finally, she slows down a bit, and approaches a mahogany door. She lightly slides her hand over the doorknob and turns it, and it opens. She looks back at us and smiles and we follow her inside.

As we walk in and the lights turn on automatically again and we are in a library. There are mahogany shelves lined with all kinds of books, claw footed chairs, and scrolling chaise lounges and little couches set around the room, and a grand piano in one corner beside a scrolling staircase leading up. On the floor above are giant world maps, and paintings of different scenes from Greek mythology painted above extend to the domed ceiling. This room is embellished with gold leaf trim and has a marble floor.

I notice Zane looking up at the maps on the second floor, and I zero in on the books.

“Wow, this is amazing…” I say.

“Yeah,” Sophie says, raising her brows and nodding.

I walk toward the bookshelves, stepping up and touching the books. The covers are ornate, as if they are old collector’s versions.

“Yeah,” Sophie says, walking up to me and nodding. “There’s a leather-bound and signed copy of the *Chronicles of Narnia…”*

I raise my eyebrows. That was one of the first series I ever read…

“Wow…” I say.

“And, there are leather-bound collectors editions of Whitman, Emerson, Thoreau… Um… Dante’s *Divine Comedy…”*

Zane and I look at each other, exchanging an incredulous look. He raises his eyebrows, and I shake my head a bit, biting my lip and stifling a smile.

“What?” Sophie asks, looking between us, noticing our exchange.

“Well…” I say, gesturing with my eyes at Zane, “he loves Thoreau,” I look back at her, “And Dante’s *Divine Comedy* is the most…” I shake my head, trying to think of a word that could encompass the entire *Divine Comedy.*

*“Epic...”* Sophie fills in.

We laugh. The double meaning sinking in.

“Like, literally… *an epic…”* I say, and we keep laughing.

Zane gives us a look like we’re crazy, and glances at the maps upstairs. He walks over to the ornate staircase and starts walking up, his hands in his pockets.

Sophie notices him heading up, and wanders toward the staircase.

I keep looking through the books, *these are amazing…* and she walks up the staircase behind him. After she gets up to the second floor, I hear them chatting about the maps, and how old and cool they are… And then I hear Zane talking about a sword that’s mounted on the wall on the far side of the balcony… He always thinks old maps and weapons are cool. He and Sophie are chatting animatedly, and Sophie is laughing as he makes some snappy comments I can’t quite make out.

I feel a pang of jealousy. I’m not really into those things, so we don’t really connect over them… but, *she* seems into them. I feel a little left out. But, still, its old maps and swords. I shake my head at myself. I turn away from the bookshelf, and they are already walking down the stairs.

They look hot together. I shake my head. I must be crazy.

But, I mean. My man, and my… girl…

My… ?

I don’t know if she’s my anything.

But, my… first woman…

They are down the stairs now, and Sophie glides over to me, her butterfly dress fluttering as she walks, her toned, golden leg sliding out as she walks.

“Come here,” Sophie says to me, taking my hand again. She leads me over to the gorgeous glossy black grand piano, Zane following behind her.

“I don’t know if you two do this, but…”

She slides a tiny silver vial from somewhere in her dress… I can’t imagine where, maybe there are pockets in the folds of her dress?

She unscrews the top of her little silver container, and the lid becomes a tiny silver spoon. She scoops into the vial, and pours some white powder onto the piano.

Zane looks suddenly ravenous, and I can feel his energy surge toward her.

She looks at us.

My stomach lurches. I feel my eyes widen.

“What is?…” I begin to ask, and Zane interrupts me.

“That’s coke. That’s drugs, baby,” Zane says.

“Do you want some?” Sophie asks, the sparkle in her eyes dancing.

No.

I’ve never done that before.

Zane nods.

He nods!

What is happening?

“Have you done this before?” She asks him.

He nods.

He nods!?!

I snap my head over to him, eyes zeroing in.

“When have you done cocaine?” I demand, fury rising again at yet another thing he’s kept from me.

“In college a couple of times… Nothing like… regular or anything…” he says.

He can do whatever he wants, but I can’t believe this. I can’t believe he’s about to do this.

Sophie looks between us again.

“Do you have a credit card, or something? She asks, and Zane jumps to reach for his wallet, pulling out a card and handing it to her.

She takes it and turns to her tiny pile of powder, making tiny diagonal chops into it, and then sliding it into a straight thin row. She sets his card on the piano.

Sophie leans down, and plugs one nostril, inhaling, she slides her nose along the line, sniffing it all the way in.

Zane looks so excited, his pupils are already dilated as he watches her.

She stands again and dabs her nostril gently with her knuckle. She looks at him, and the two of them exchange a look, nodding.

Sophie takes her vial again, scooping another small amount of powder onto the piano. Picking up his card, she chops into it and slides it into a line. She looks up and gestures to him. He leans down to the white line on the piano, plugs a nostril, and sniffs it the exact way Sopie just did.

Sophie looks at me.

“What about you? No pressure, you can totally say no...” She says.

I look at Zane and her.

Exciting… and hot… that’s the kind of woman he wants. And Sophie is beyond hot, and now she’s more exciting than I am, too.

I swallow.

I have never done something like this.

I am no longer the same person. Tonight, I am someone new. Tonight, I am whoever I want to be…

I nod.

And she scoops some onto the piano for me, chops it up, and slides and taps it into a line with the card. She hands the card back to Zane, and he slides it back into his wallet, and puts his wallet back into his pocket.

I take a deep breath. My heart is racing. I can’t believe what I’m about to do.

I look at the line on the piano.

I look at Zane and then glance over at Sophie, who is looking at me, and back at the powder in front of me. And then I lean down, and plug one nostril, and sniff along the smooth piano, the powder shooting into my nostril, burning a bit as it goes in. I stand, and look right into Zane’s eyes.

I can’t believe I have just done cocaine.

Zane looks impressed and nods at me.

Sophie screws the lid back on her tiny vial and pulls a few tissues from her magic pocket. She hands us each one, wipes our evidence off the top of the piano, and then dabs her nose.

“Come on,” She says, grabbing me by the hand and pulling me toward the champagne chaise lounge. We follow along behind her and sit with her, sniffling a bit and dabbing at our noses.

I smile and Zane smiles at me, reaching over and caressing my cheek.

“You two are adorable,” Sophie coos to us.

I laugh, cuddling into Zane.

Sophie leans in close to me.

I feel a surge rising up through me, like I have just drank 5 energy drinks at once. It feels nice. Almost like a soft, mild orgasm…

“I’m glad you texted me. I like you guys. I felt really bad… I’m glad you worked things out…”

I nod.

And I think of the hotel…

The moment lingers, and I know we are all thinking about the hotel.

“I mean… *did* you work things out?” Sophie asks.

I exchange a look with Zane.

Did we work things out? No. Not really. He isn’t supposed to be here with me and her. I was supposed to pursue her alone. And yet… it feels so natural to be here with the two of them… It doesn’t feel awkward at all. I like her… and he is geeking out with her about maps… Which… I’m kind of okay with in a strange way.

I shake my head.

“We… We don’t… We don’t know what we’re doing…” I say, laughing.

“But, you’re here with me,” She says.

“Yes,” I say.

“I’m just going to stay out of it,” Zane says, matter of fact.

“…But…” I say, “What if I don’t want you to stay out of it…”

Zane looks at me, his eyes zeroing in on mine.

...Maybe Zane had been hard earlier because of *us.* The three of us together...

“…What if I… kind of like it…”

Zane tilts his head, and his face breaks into a smile.

“Like *what?”* He asks.

“Like… the three of us together…” I say.

My statement hangs in the air, and the three of us exchange looks.

“You mean, you want me to fuck you, and *her…”* he says.

“…I… I…” I stammer. I can’t explain it, but yes, I… do.

“Well… I mean…” Zane is stammering now.

I made *him* stammer.

“…I mean… Sophie?…” Zane looks at her.

“Well,” she pauses, “I don’t usually have sex without protection,” Sophie says, looking at Zane.

“I don’t want you having sex with her without protection, either,” I say, looking back at him. “I don’t want her getting pregnant.” I shake my head.

“I mean, I have an IUD, but still…” Sophie says.

We all nod. My heart pounds. What am I doing? Am I actually making agreements about *me* and *Zane* fucking another woman? Does this mean *we* have a *girlfriend?*

“Do you have a condom?” She asks.

We don’t. We’re married, and I have an IUD, too. This doesn’t usually come up…

We shake our heads.

“Well, you know what that means…” Zane says.

Sophie and I look at each other, tilting our heads.

“What?” We both ask simultaneously.

“That means that tonight…” He looks at me, “You lick her pussy while I fuck you…”

I look at Sophie, and we smile.