When I finally opened my eyes, the room around me felt heavy and unfamiliar, every detail blurred in a soft morning haze.
My head pounded, memories of last night slowly piecing themselves together.. a dark club, dancing, laughter. And then... him.
I pushed myself up on the bed, pulling the sheet tightly around me as I tried to get my bearings.
That’s when I saw him.
Sitting in an armchair by the window, elbows on his knees, head in his hands.
I froze, a wave of panic rising in my chest. I knew that silhouette, that set of shoulders.
“Tyler?” I breathed, the word barely audible, like saying his name might shatter what was left of my sanity.
He lifted his head, his gaze steady and almost... sad. “Hey……. Sam.”
The sight of him there.. now.. made my stomach twist. Memories flooded back all at once: his apologies, his promises, his lies.
All the times I’d trusted him and ended up hurt, each one a fresh sting now as I realized I was back in his orbit.
“What are you doing here?” My voice cracked, a mix of shock and anger bubbling to the surface. “Why... how did this even happen?”
Tyler looked down, rubbing the back of his neck, as though he was equally unsure of what to say.
“I didn’t realize it was you, not at first. It wasn’t until we… until we were talking that it hit me.”
I clutched the sheet tighter, my heart pounding. “And yet you didn’t stop.”
“I wanted to,” he said quietly, meeting my gaze, “but it’s you, Sam. Seeing you again…” He let the sentence trail off, his expression a confusing blend of regret and something else, something almost tender.
I shook my head, trying to clear the fog in my brain, trying to understand how I’d ended up back there, tangled up in his mess all over again.
“Tyler, I left you for a reason. You remember that, don’t you?”
He didn’t flinch, just nodded slowly. “I know, Sam. And I’ve spent every day since then regretting what I did, what I threw away.”
I swallowed, trying to quell the surge of emotions. “That’s not enough, Tyler. Regret doesn’t erase everything you put me through. I moved on. I had to.”
“I know,” he said again, softer this time. “I just… I didn’t expect to see you like this, not here, not now.”
The sincerity in his eyes disarmed me, but I couldn’t let myself fall back into this. Not after everything.
My heart already felt torn enough between the remnants of London and the ghosts of New York, and Tyler’s presence only made it worse.
“Maybe this was a mistake,” I whispered, more to myself than to him. “Maybe last night was a way for me to escape, and you… you were just there.” I needed to believe it, to distance myself from whatever last night had been.
Tyler took a deep breath, his gaze unwavering. “I know that. But I need you to understand, Sam.. I’m sorry. For everything. I should’ve never let you go. I was an idiot back then, and I’m an idiot now, but…” His voice broke slightly. “Seeing you, it’s brought back everything.”
I closed my eyes, trying to block out the painful sincerity in his words.
Because a part of me.. one that I wished I could ignore.. missed him too.
Tyler and I had a history, memories that refused to fade completely, no matter how hard I tried to bury them.
“Tyler,” I started, struggling to find the right words, “we’re different people now. I have my own dreams, and I’ve been through things you wouldn’t understand.” My voice softened, my anger dissolving into a familiar ache. “And, honestly, I don’t think I can go back to who I was with you.”
He nodded, the acceptance in his eyes a small comfort. “I get it, Sam. I do. But if there’s any chance for us to even talk, to sort out what happened… I want that. I owe you that, if nothing else.”
His words hung in the air, and I felt a twinge of something I couldn’t quite define.. anger, regret, maybe even the faintest glimmer of hope. Despite everything, despite the pain, I couldn’t deny that part of me still wondered what could’ve been.
“I don’t know if I can give you that, Tyler,” I murmured. “This isn’t something I can just… forget.”
He nodded slowly, as if understanding. “I’m not asking you to forget. Just to let me try to make things right, even if it’s too late for that.”
A strange quiet fell over the room, a truce neither of us expected. I finally pulled the sheet around me, gathering the courage to meet his gaze.
I nodded, feeling the weight of his words settle in, but refusing to let them sway me. There was too much hurt lodged between us, too many broken promises that couldn’t be erased by a single apology, no matter how genuine it sounded.
“Tyler, I don’t think you understand how much damage was done,” I said, my voice steady but edged with pain. “It’s not something a conversation or an apology can fix.”
He looked down, his hands fidgeting slightly, as if searching for the right response. "I know that, Sam. I just thought… if we could at least talk, I might have a chance to show you that I’ve changed.”
I shook my head, feeling the familiar sting of bitterness rise up.
“I’m not looking for that. Whatever you’ve been through, whatever growth you think you’ve had.. it doesn’t erase what happened between us. I’ve moved on, Tyler. I’m not that lady anymore, and I don’t want to be.”
He looked up, his gaze raw. “I get it,” he murmured, though his voice betrayed a note of disappointment. “I won’t force this. I just… I had to try.”
I looked away, focusing on the floor, gathering the strength I needed to put an end to this conversationT.
It would be too easy to let his remorse pull me back in, but I knew better.
I’d worked too hard to rebuild myself after him.
Without another word, I slipped out of bed, wrapping the sheet around myself, and turned toward the bathroom, leaving him alone with his apologies and unspoken regrets.
As I closed the bathroom door behind me, I felt a strange sense of finality, even if I wasn’t sure where it would lead.
For now, I just needed a moment to breathe, to let the reality of last night fade away with the morning light.