Chapter 16 Broken Resolve
ELENA
I sat on the cold metal stool in the now familiar prison visitation room as I waited. The glass that separated me from the other side of the room was thick and scratched, and the very faint smell of cheap disinfectant was heavy in the air.
Soon, the door opened to reveal a prison warden who led my father into the room. I gripped the edge of my chair when I spotted him as I stared at the man on the other side. He looked smaller somehow—pale, worn out even. His hazel eyes were weak and old, even looking older than his age.
Around, his eyes sagged with dark circles, and his nose was red, almost as if he had been blowing them before I arrived.
"Papa," I whispered, tremblingly, taking in my father's figure. "How are you?" I asked him. I didn't need anyone to tell me that my father, who used to lead a much more sophisticated life than he had been reduced to now, was finding it difficult to keep up.
My father forced a smile, the kind that was meant to soothe, but it only revealed how fragile he truly was.
"I'm fine, Elena. The food here could use some seasoning, but it's fine. Don't worry about me, sweetheart." He said, still with the unconvincing smile on.
Tears welled up in my eyes, and I pressed my lips together to keep myself from sobbing.
"Don't lie to me, Papa. You don't look fine." I said. My lips were still trembling, and I longed to hold his hands. But I couldn't. Thanks to the thick glass wall that separated us from each other. I couldn't even touch my own father.
He let out a sigh as his hazel dropped down to his hands, which rested limply on the small counter in front of him.
"It doesn't matter how I look, Elena. What matters is that you're safe." He said to me with relief in his eyes.
"Safe?!" My voice rose, and a tear escaped as it rolled down my cheek. I wiped it away hastily with my still trembling hands. "You call this safe? You're in here taking the fall for something you clearly didn't do, and you think that keeps me safe? Papa, please tell me who did this to you. We can fight this together. We can—" I was saying, but my father shook his head.
"No," my father interrupted sharply, and his voice was firm despite its weariness. "Elena, I'm not telling you anything. You need to let this go," he said adamantly.
Of course.
He was as stubborn as I was.
And he thought he was trying to protect me.
Typical of my father. It was typical of him to want to do things alone, even after he promised we would do it together.
"I can't!" I cried, my voice cracking with emotion. I placed my hand against the glass, my palm pressed flat against its cold surface. "I can't just sit still and watch you waste away in here. You're my father. You protected me my entire life, and now I want to protect you!" I said to him, trying my hardest to make him see reason.
My father's expression softened, and after a brief hesitation, he raised his hand to the glass and mirrored mine. Our palms aligned, and we seemed to be separated only by the barrier. He smiled faintly—a sad and almost defeated smile.
"You're just like your mother," he murmured in a voice tinged with pride and pain.
"Then let me fight like she would have!" I begged as my tears flowed freely. "Please, Papa. Let me help you," I continued to beg.
"You help me by staying out of this," he replied. By now, his voice had grown firmer. "This is bigger than you, Elena. Bigger than both of us. And I won't let you get caught in the crossfire. Promise me you'll stay away from this." He said in a pleading voice. He didn't want anything to happen to me.
I shook my head vehemently as my fist curled against the glass.
Of course, I was never going to promise him that!
I had every intention of doing the opposite.
"I can't promise that. I won't promise that!" I declared.
Before my father could respond, two police officers entered the room.
"Time's up," one of them announced curtly.
"No," I pleaded in a desperate voice as I turned to the officers.
"Please, just give us a little more time!" I begged as the tears continued to flow down my cheeks.
The officers ignored me as they opened the door on my father's side and roughly grabbed him by the arms.
"Don't fight them," my father said quickly. His voice was still calm even as the officers pulled him away almost violently without minding that he was a little bit above middle age. "Elena, don't get involved. Stay safe—for me." He kept saying to me in an authoritative voice—the same voice he used on me when he was warning me not to go to the high school party or take any of his cars.
"Papa!" I screamed as my fists repeatedly hit against the glass, as the officers dragged him out of sight. "Please, don't go! Please!" I begged. I wished he could go home with me. I wished all these would be over, and life would get back to normal.
But he was gone, and I was left alone in the cold, silent room, and left with the reality that it was indeed a sad world and that the prison waiting room was enough evidence for me.
That didn't stop me from crying, though.
The tears kept coming as I kept wailing.
My father was the only family I had left.
The only one who still cared about me.
Now?
Now...
I woke with a start, with my heart racing against my ribs as though it was trying to escape from my chest. My face was damp, and it took me a moment to realize I had been crying. My eyes were streaked with hot tears. The thought of my crying made me cry even more. I sat up and clutched gently at my chest as the events of the dream replayed over and over again in my mind, and it kept making me breathless by the second, like a suffocating blanket.
It was a dream. Just a dream.
It was a part of my past, but it was a dream this time. I kept telling myself.
But the dream felt so real—the coldness of the glass when I had placed my hand on it, the sound of my father's voice, it had been a really long while since I heard him, and then there was the helplessness I had felt as they took him away.
I let out a sigh as I wiped at my tears with a small whimper.
What did the dream mean?
A soft knock sounded at Riley's door before it swung open. Riley stood in the doorway, her face etched with concern.
"Elena? Are you okay? I heard you crying." Riley asked me.
I wiped at my face hurriedly and sniffled.
"I'm fine. I just...I had a nightmare." I let out while I blinked.
Riley crossed the room and came to sit beside me on the bed, and then she pulled me into a comforting hug.
"Must've been some nightmare," she said lightly, though her tone was gentle. "You were crying like someone just stole your chocolate stash." She commented.
I gave a watery laugh even though the sound was more of a hiccup.
"It wasn't about chocolate." I clarified. Riley is coming up with weird stuff.
"Well, obviously," Riley teased as she instinctively pulled back to look at me. "You're too emotional for it to be about food. You sure you're not pregnant or something?" She asked me.
My eyes widened, and I stared at Riley, speechless.
I had yet to break the news to Riley. Sure, Riley had detected it and stuff, but I had denied it outright. When I had confirmed with Doctor Blake, I had not thought of the best time to break the news to my roommate and friend.
Some friend I was.
Riley laughed.
"Relax, I'm joking! Geez, you're really worked up. Whatever that dream was, it's not real, okay? You're safe, and everything's fine." She assured me, even though she didn't know what it was.
I nodded slowly, though the ache in my chest remained. Riley might have meant well, but she didn't understand. The nightmare wasn't just some part of my imagination; it was, in fact, an actual past action of my reality.
Now my dad was dead and gone. After everything, I still had yet to find the people behind all of this.
Riley went on and on with chattering about nightmares and how her mother had tried to make it seem less scary for herself and her siblings, but....Well, I wasn't listening anymore.
I was already thinking things through.
It seemed like I was this close!
Otherwise, why was I seeing my father in the dream if I wasn't close to finding answers?
Or!
What if?!
What if he was trying to warn me off?
The same way John West had done.
It was all too much of a mystery to me!