((Trigger warning - violence, physical and sexual abuse))
It had been two days since they arrived at Tikivah, and one night since Taria's suicide attempt.
Last night, her father had been busy discussing a proposal with Head Zeppus, that he hadn't come to check on her.
She hoped that tonight would be the same. She had spent the whole day alone in this guest room that had been allocated to her, and she wished to spend her night the same way.
Except that she had never really been alone, not after that night with the nosy warrior.
She had even forgotten what his name was, but she remembered his words clearly.
In fact, they had been haunting her ever since she had heard them, and the more she thought about it, the more her mind entertained the possibility of her killing her father.
Maybe it was because of how he had looked at her when he had said it, like he considered her capable of erasing her troubles if she wanted to. Like all she had to do was snap and it would all be gone.
He looked at her like she wasn't just a woman.
It was different from the way others back at Aniktaki looked at her. It was different from the disgust or pity they gave her there. Different from the judging looks they gave her here.
A gentle cool breeze swept into the room, through the window, and the flame from the candles that kept the room lit, swayed to the movement of the air, before becoming more stable. Her fingers ran through her hair as she toyed with the table knife in her other hand.
It was dull.
It couldn't do any fatal damage to anyone. Despite knowing that, she imagined striking it right through her father's neck, and the thought of that had given her much more peace than the thought of taking her own life.
It felt more justified for things to happen that way. Justice for her Sufi, for her, for every woman in Aniktaki and her mother who didn't even know she needed it.
It felt satisfying.
So satisfying that it startled her. She threw the knife across the room in fright, and raced to her feet, her heart skipping so many beats, her thoughts colliding.
That was murder!
By Ignas, she couldn't be capable of taking someone else's life.
She was a woman.
That was enough reason for her to just go along with the system, or take herself out of it by taking her own life.
What else could a woman do?
The nosy warrior seemed to have believed there was more she could do, but it would be stupid to give relevance to his speech.
He was no Village Head, no heir to a Village Head, he was nothing.
A nobody.
Just like Moti.
Also, what would a man understand about the troubles of a woman?
Nothing.
The door moved slowly as her father walked in. Quickly she sprung up on her feet, her black eyeballs dancing in fear, the closer her father got.
She counted the steps.
He had taken three and it would take only three more for him to get to her.
"Daughter of my heart, you are still awake." He gestured to her, his arms wide for an embrace, as he smiled broadly, revealing his perfect set of white teeth.
Taria's body tensed up as his arms went around, he sucked in a deep breath, throwing a compliment her way before letting her go.
"Father," she answered in a small voice, trying to escape from him, but her heels hit the bed and she knew she had been cornered.
Not again.
Not this again.
"Zeppus and I just concluded a great deal," he smiled, his eyes glimmering with excitement. He took a seat at the edge of the bed, and pulled her gently to sit next to him. Blatantly ignoring her signs of nervousness, so his mood wouldn't be ruined.
"Everything is about to get better with Aniktaki. Especially with the food." He leaned in, pressing his forehead against hers, as he ran his fingers through her hair.
Anger flashed in his eyes when she started to tremble, and he pulled away slightly, shifting his focus to her multicolored hair.
"You are happy Baba lets you keep your hair right?"
It was customary that once a woman had been made a Tower woman, her hair would be shaved away, and a drawing signifying her status would be tattooed on her scalp.
Her father had waived the custom in her case and the brainwashed people of Aniktaki had praised him for being lenient, despite the hardship she had brought upon him.
Taria hated her hair. Her father loved it and for that reason alone, she despised everything about it.
She wished they had shaved it off.
Taking a fistful of her hair, he pulled her closer and she suppressed the groan of a pain she was all too familiar with. Tears welled up in her eyes and the emptiness in her stomach felt even more present than ever.
There was insanity in her father's black eyes.
"Say you like that I got rid of that disgusting thing in your belly." He kept his voice even. Roughly, he slipped his hand around her waist and caged her to him.
Why couldn't she play along for once?!
Sufi was so much better.
Obedient.
Sometimes, such as now, he missed her.
"Shhhhhhhh." He said when she started sobbing, swiping his tongue up the left side of her face, licking her tears away.
Taria could feel every strength she had to crumble, her struggle weak against her father's strong arms. There was nothing she could do. He was bigger than her, stronger her, more powerful.
"If you behave very well tonight and serve Baba, I will tell them not to flog you at the Tower tomorrow. Also, if you behave every time I come to pay a visit to you in the Tower, I will make sure they let you be." He cooed like he was speaking to a child. "Now, say you love me."
More sobbing.
He was starting to lose his patience.
"Say it."
His grip around her waist became tighter.
"Say it, you stupid girl!" He tossed her toughly to the bed like a ragged doll. His hands flew to his pants to undo it.
Taria's heart was hammering.
"Why can't you be like Sufi for once?!"
The words hit her like a brick.
Sufi died because of him.
How dare he?!
"Be obedient!" He rushed over to her, fisting her hair, as he pulled her close, his breath hot on her face, while his knees caged her below him. "Say you love me, child."
She stared back at him, her eyes filled with rage, her tongue filled with venom. She could feel bitterness course through her veins, and a thirst for revenge drying her throat.
"I. Wish. You. Were. Dead."
Her wish came true faster than she could have expected it.
In a split second, her father went still above her, his eyes filled with pain and terror, the tip of the table knife Taria had thrown across the room some moments ago, sticking out from his Adam's apple, dripping with blood.
His blood.
Lifelessly, he fell to her side, making Taria's confused gaze meet the horrified ones of the maid at the door.
They both stared at the other for a second, before the maid gave into a scream and took to her heels, shouting, "A WITCH!"