Chapter 7

A quick Google search was all it took to confirm every single one of Sidd’s claims, and each time I tried to convince myself that I couldn’t have spent a night with the Elijah Wilder, my memory of the morning after our night together, as well as the flicker of recognition that’d flashed through his eyes when we met in the lobby would come into sharp focus.

I didn’t want it to be true, but it would’ve been delusional to deny that we did what we did, and nothing could be done about that, though in my defense I’d been unaware of this tidbit of information at the time. But ignorance wouldn’t suffice as an excuse for all the company regulations we’d broken, and since I didn’t see them firing one of their major players I knew the blame would fall on me and kept waiting for the axe to fall until Sidd, who religiously kept tabs on the man, let slip that Elijah was on a business trip in Luxembourg.

A whole month passed before it felt like I could breathe again, and I was able to let go of an image that plagued my every waking moment; one of me arriving at the Wilkinson office to find that I’d been sacked because I slept with the boss. Pretty soon after, that I decided I’d put the entire ordeal behind me, taking a page out of Elijah’s book to ignore him as he’d ignored me.

It was a prospect that I surprisingly looked forward to, a chance to prove to the both of us that I wasn’t so completely in his thrall, and though I didn’t know it an opportunity soon presented itself in the form of an email from Rita informing me of the upcoming employee performance appraisal, my first since I started at Wilkinson.

Of course I was nervous, but while presenting in front of a roomful of corporates was not a decision I would’ve chosen for myself I’d graduated top of my class and never hesitated to get my hands dirty if I saw there was a need for it.

On the appointed day, I put on my big girl pants and power walked to work with an LV purse (also fake) and cappuccino in tow, determined to prove to anyone who so much as threw a glance at me that I deserved my spot at the table, and was touched when the first thing my eyes landed on as soon as I stepped into my office was a card from Markus and Sidd congratulating me on crushing my assessment ahead of time.

At seven a.m. it was still pretty early, which meant they’d waited until I left the day before to place it on my desk, and my vision swam as I tethered on the verge of tearing up over their unexpected show of emotion.

I would crush it, I decided as I put the card into my top drawer and set myself to the task of running over my PowerPoint presentation looking for flaws, but to my eyes, it appeared as watertight as I could make it, and realizing that nothing else could be done about it, I began to memorize everything.

By the time I drifted off to sleep, I wasn’t aware of anything else.

•

I awoke with a start, experiencing a moment of pure terror where I imagined the meeting had come and gone while I napped on, oblivious to the fact that I was absent from my first performance appraisal.

I sat up with a jerk; frantic as my eyes searched for the wall clock, and only calming down when I saw that just little over thirty minutes had passed. The relief was instantaneous, leaving me boneless, and I collapsed back into my desk chair, registering for the first time that both Sidd and Markus were around, and their eyes were trained on me.

“Rise and shine, sleeping beauty,” Sidd greeted, earning a sour glare from my end which he met with an equally sweet smile.

Sleeping Beauty jokes came with the territory of being named after one of the most famous Disney characters ever created, I guess, and because I had a lifetime of practice to go on, they rarely ever bothered me—mostly, at least.

Sometimes an unfortunate soul would catch me at a very bad time, usually a very tense situation, and it would be like a mini bomb going off. The thought of my many arguments with David on the subject came unbidden into my thoughts, and I shook it off, nodding at Markus, who returned the gesture.

“What?” Sidd questioned, leaning forward in his chair. “I don’t get a solidarity nod too?”

I searched myself for any hint of the goodwill I’d felt towards him from his card barely half an hour ago, found there was none, and was getting ready to snap at him when Markus beat me to it.

“Sidd,” he began, obviously as exasperated as I was, and when our colleague answered he followed up with an order, three simple words that in that moment sounded like music to my ears.

“Just, shut up.”

For a nanosecond I entertained a fantasy that I hadn’t walked into what would most likely be the origin of World War III, happening in real time, but all of my dreams fell to dust when Sidd’s eyes widened in a show of righteous affront, proving he wouldn’t take this lying down.

He opened his mouth to clap back with a retort that was probably more scathing than he’d received, and I was readying myself to do damage control when the door of our office swung inward to reveal Rita in all her Chanel No. 5, Jimmy Choo wearing glory. Immediately, we fell silent, straightening under the weight of her heavy stare.

Rita St. James was unlike any other person I’d met in my life—stunningly gorgeous, with a sense of such complete self-awareness that she seemed to exist within her own orbit. I’d thought that after hearing of the way things between her and Tristan ended I would feel a sense of camaraderie the next time I saw her, but now as she stood by the doorframe, I felt nothing except the usual combination of terror and awe that she always struck in me even though she was just a year older than me.

In that moment, she appeared as far removed from heartbreak as anyone could be, the girl boss blueprint, and I belatedly I realized that not only was she looking in my direction, but also that she’d been speaking and in my reverie I hadn’t caught a single word.

“—is that clear?” she finished, and I dipped my head in a sharp nod, the thought of asking her to repeat herself never crossing my mind.

Rita leveled her gaze at me, and in that moment I wondered irrationally if she could see into my head. It was a discomfiting thought, and I relaxed slightly when she turned her attention away from me to give Sidd and Markus their orders while I rummaged through the papers on my desk, pretending as if I hadn’t finished off my work quota in anticipation of today.

She uttered my name as soon as she finished. I could feel every muscle in me lock up and raised my eyes to meet her until our gazes met.

“Well?” Rita said, and a beat passed before I deduced that she was asking me to get up. I obliged too quickly, accidently dropping my MacBook on my desk at the sudden motion and I scrambled to pick it up, taking a moment to inspect it to ensure it wasn’t damaged in any personal way as it would be too expensive to replace.

Satisfied, I skirted around my table to meet her, and almost gave into an impulse to jump when I felt the heavy weight of her hand come to rest on my shoulder.

She had on a slightly worried expression. “It’s okay you know, if you aren’t ready. We could reschedule, make this assessment a bit more one-on-one if that’s something you’re interested in.”

I had no idea what it was that she was talking about but figured she didn’t actually expect me to take her up on her offer, so pursed my lips, dipped my chin, and squared my shoulders.

“Lead the way, please,” I said with a forced smile, and in an instant she straightened, taking her hand off my shoulder.

“Right, then,” she replied, expression blank. “Let’s get to it.”

•

They called the conference room Kentucky. I must admit that while this earned a quick chuckle from me the first time I heard it, I wasn’t laughing now. Nobody was.

Save the occasional shuffling of feet as the room filled with line managers as well as some senior management no words were uttered. Chairs were sat on, ties readjusted, coughs muffled, and vaguely it registered that more men than women occupied the room. It was a thought that only made it strike home harder, how this single assessment could impact my future at Wilkinson. I’d done my research and knew that much at least.

Before long, there was a roomful of expectant faces turned up at me, and I muttered an encouragement to steady my nerves before pasting on my most convincing smile and pressing down the power button of the projector remote, just as I’d been instructed by the IT guy I went over my presentation with, Remi.

Nothing happened. I waited for a moment longer to make sure it wasn’t coming on before pushing down on it again, with more deliberateness this time. But the results remained the same, and after a while a low buzz of confused murmurs began to fill the room.

Internally I was beginning to panic, but my easy smile remained pinned on and apologetically I held up the remote.

“Something must’ve gone wrong with the connection,” I explained, feeling a pit open up in my stomach when I noticed that several of the seated figures had started to scribble into their notepads.

My eyes scanned the room until they landed on Rita, who was sat at the back of the room, and something in my expression must’ve given away my panic as she glanced around to make sure no one could see her before shooting me reassuring thumbs up.

I tethered myself to this one act of kindness in a roomful of unfriendly faces that could care less about whether or not I succeeded in this, held on till it felt like I wouldn’t fall flat on my face if I tried to navigate the room in my stilettos.

I knew everything in that PowerPoint. Hell, I’d come up with it, and with this reminder I felt the last of my anxiety melt away to nothing. It would take more than a faulty projector to stop me, and Rita shot me one final grin before letting her hands drop to her thighs.

At the exact same moment Kentucky’s doors swung open, and in walked none other than Elijah fucking Wilder.