Chapter 73 Telling me the truth
Amara POV
Sleep doesn’t come as easily as it should.
After everything that happened tonight, after the tension at dinner and the weight of every word that was said, I should be exhausted enough to pass out the second my head hits the pillow.
But instead, my mind won’t slow down. It keeps circling the same thoughts over and over again, replaying every look, every shift in tone, every small moment that felt like it mattered more than it should have.
Sebastian sleeps beside me, completely unaffected by the storm in my head. One arm is draped across my waist, his body warm and solid against mine, his breathing slow and even in a way that almost feels unfair. This is so much more natural than what I’m used to back home..
I watch him for a moment, studying the way the tension has finally left his face, the way his features soften when he lets himself rest. Even now, even like this, there is something protective in the way he holds me, like some part of him refuses to let go, even in sleep.
My fingers move lightly over his arm, tracing the muscle there without thinking, careful not to wake him. He stirs slightly at the contact, a quiet breath leaving him, but he doesn’t open his eyes.
Good.
He needs this. He needs the rest in a way I don’t think he would ever admit.
I don’t.
Carefully, I shift out from under his arm, moving slowly enough not to disturb him. The loss of his warmth is immediate, the cool air of the room brushing against my skin as I sit up.
I pull a loose robe around myself before slipping out of bed, my bare feet meeting the cold stone floor. The room suddenly feels too still, too quiet, and I realize quickly that staying here isn’t going to help.
I need to move.
The hallway outside is dimly lit, the torches along the walls burning low and casting long, flickering shadows across the black stone. The castle at night feels different than it does during the day. It’s quieter, yes, but not empty.
There’s a presence to it, a quiet awareness that lingers in every corner, in every shift of shadow. Servants move somewhere in the distance, their footsteps soft and controlled, barely audible unless you’re listening for them.
I walk without a clear destination, letting my hand trail lightly along the wall as I move. The cool stone grounds me, gives me something steady to focus on while my thoughts refuse to settle. Everything from tonight presses in at once. My father’s words. The artifacts. The way he looked at me. The way he… changed, even if only slightly.
“You should be sleeping.”
The voice comes from behind me, cutting cleanly through my thoughts. I stop, turning slowly to find Tomas standing a few steps away, leaning lightly against the wall as though he has been there longer than I realized. His posture is as composed as ever, hands resting behind his back, but there is something in his expression that feels less guarded than usual.
“I could say the same to you,” I reply, studying him.
A faint smile touches his lips, subtle and controlled. “Vampires don’t require sleep the same way you do.”
“Convenient,” I mutter.
“It has its advantages.”
The quiet settles between us for a moment, not uncomfortable, but not entirely easy either. He pushes himself off the wall after a second and steps a little closer, though he still keeps a respectful distance. He always does. There is a line he never crosses, even when no one is there to enforce it.
“You’re thinking,” he says, his tone calm, almost certain.
“That obvious?” I ask.
“Yes.”
I let out a quiet breath, glancing down the corridor before looking back at him. “A lot happened tonight.”
“That would be an understatement.”
The words hang there for a moment before I decide not to dance around it anymore.
“You knew,” I say, my voice more direct now.
Tomas doesn’t pretend not to understand. His gaze holds mine steadily, and there is no hesitation when he answers.
“Yes.”
“About the marriage,” I continue. “About my father wanting me to marry you.”
“I did.”
The honesty is almost irritating. There’s no excuse, no attempt to soften it, just a simple admission.
“And you didn’t think to tell me?” I ask, my frustration slipping through more than I intend.
“It wasn’t my place,” he replies.
“That’s not an answer.”
“It is,” he says quietly, though there is no edge to it.
I shake my head, running a hand through my hair as I exhale. “You knew I had no idea. You knew he was planning something like that, and you said nothing. He would’ve tried to force it if I wasn’t marked.”
“And if I had told you?” he asks calmly. “What would that have changed?”
I open my mouth to respond, but the words stall before they can form. He watches me carefully, like he already knows the answer.
“You would have reacted,” he continues. “You would have confronted him without understanding the situation, without knowing what you were walking into.”
“And that’s worse than being blindsided?” I ask.
“Yes.”
The certainty in his voice is immediate, unshaken.
I narrow my eyes slightly. “You don’t get to decide that for me.”
“No,” he agrees. “I don’t.”
There’s a brief pause before he adds, more quietly, “But your father does.”
That lands harder than I expect it to. I look away, my chest tightening at the reminder.
“I didn’t want it like that,” he says after a moment.
My gaze snaps back to him. “What?”
“The marriage,” he clarifies. “I didn’t want it to happen that way.”
I study him carefully, trying to read past the calm exterior he always wears. “You didn’t seem very against it.”
“I am a general in his court,” he replies. “It is not my place to argue his decisions.”
“That’s convenient.”
“It’s reality.”
Silence settles between us again, heavier this time, but not tense in the same way as before. There is something more honest in it now, something less guarded.
“I do care about you,” he says finally.
The words are quiet, but they don’t waver.
I blink, caught slightly off guard by the directness of it. “Tomas-“
“I know,” he interrupts gently. “You are mated.”
There is no bitterness in his voice, no resentment. Just acceptance.
“I felt it the moment I saw you with him,” he continues. “The bond is not something that can be ignored. The way you look at him, the way he looks at you.. it is not something anyone could mistake.”
My chest tightens at that, not because he’s wrong, but because of how simply he says it.
“I would never act on it,” he adds, his tone firm now. “I would not disrespect that. Or you.”
I swallow slowly, unsure what to say.
“I didn’t ask you to feel that way,” I manage.
“I know.”
“And I can’t-“
“I know that too.”
His gaze softens slightly, though the distance between us remains.
“That does not mean it disappears,” he says.
There isn’t really anything to argue with there, so I don’t try. The truth of it settles between us, quiet but undeniable.
After a moment, Tomas straightens slightly, that composed version of himself slipping back into place as if the brief honesty never happened.
“You should try to rest,” he says.
I let out a small breath. “I tried.”
“Try again.”
A faint smile pulls at my lips despite everything. “You sound like him.”
“I will take that as a compliment.”
I shake my head lightly, turning back toward the direction of my room. After a step, I pause and glance back at him.
“Thank you,” I say.
He raises a brow slightly. “For what?”
“For telling me the truth.”
There is a brief pause before he nods once.
“Always.”
I don’t say anything else after that. I just turn and make my way back down the corridor, the castle quieter now, or maybe just less overwhelming than before.
Instead of going back to my room, though.. I decide I’m going to explore my father’s castle.