Chapter 30 : Alina’s Guilt
Alina’s POV
I don’t sleep that night.
Not even close.
Because Dominic told me he loves me.
Actually said the words.
Out loud.
Like confessing feelings to your fiancée’s daughter is somehow normal behavior.
And the worst part?
I didn’t tell him to take it back.
I should have.
I should’ve reminded him about my mother.
About boundaries.
About basic morality.
Instead, I stood there staring at him like my entire world had shifted under my feet.
Which honestly it probably has.
By three in the morning, I’m still awake replaying the conversation in painful detail.
Because Dominic didn’t sound impulsive.
That’s what scares me most.
He sounded certain.
Like he’d already accepted this thing between us and was simply waiting for me to stop running from it too.
My phone lights up against the nightstand.
One message.
Dominic.
Did I scare you today?
I stare at the screen for a long moment.
Then type back honestly.
Yes.
Three dots appear immediately.
I’m sorry.
The apology somehow hurts worse.
Because I know he means it.
Not sorry for loving me.
Sorry for making things harder.
I press my phone against my forehead dramatically.
I need psychiatric assistance.
Another message appears.
But I’m not sorry for telling you the truth.
My chest tightens instantly.
God.
This man is impossible.
I don’t answer again after that.
Mostly because I’m terrified of what I might say if I keep talking to him tonight.
\---
The next morning feels emotionally violent.
I drag myself into the kitchen looking exhausted enough for my mother to notice immediately.
“You look pale,” Eleanor says while pouring coffee.
“Work stress.”
“You always blame work stress.”
Because I can’t exactly tell her the truth.
Sorry Mom, your fiancé confessed his love to me on the sidewalk yesterday and now I’m spiraling psychologically.
Probably wouldn’t go over well.
I force a small smile while sitting across from her.
“You’re up early.”
“So are you.”
“I have a fitting later.”
Right.
The wedding.
The reminder hits like guilt directly to the chest.
Because while Dominic is confessing feelings to me, my mother is still happily planning a future with him.
And suddenly I feel sick.
“You okay?” she asks softly.
I blink quickly. “Yeah.”
Lie.
Very big lie.
Eleanor studies me carefully over her coffee cup.
“You’ve been distant lately.”
Panic flickers instantly through me.
“Have I?”
“Yes.” She tilts her head slightly. “You seem distracted all the time.”
That’s because your fiancé keeps looking at me like I’m the center of his universe.
I grip my coffee mug tighter instead.
“Just tired.”
“Hm.”
She doesn’t fully believe me.
And honestly?
That terrifies me.
Because if my mother starts noticing tension between Dominic and me before we figure this out, everything will collapse immediately.
“You should come to dinner tomorrow night,” she says suddenly.
My stomach drops.
“With you and Dominic?”
“Yes.” She smiles warmly. “We barely spend time together lately.”
The irony nearly kills me.
I force myself to nod casually. “Sure.”
“Good.” Her smile softens. “I miss you.”
And just like that, guilt crashes over me so hard I can barely breathe.
Because she trusts me.
Completely.
And I’m standing here emotionally falling apart over the man she plans to marry.
I suddenly hate myself a little.
\---
Work becomes impossible afterward.
Not because of deadlines.
Not because of stress.
Because every quiet second gives my thoughts room to spiral again.
Dominic loves me.
The words replay constantly.
And deep down?
I think I love him too.
That realization sits heavily inside my chest all afternoon.
Terrifying.
Beautiful.
Wrong.
“Earth to Alina,” Mia says while waving a pen dramatically in front of my face.
I blink once. “What?”
“You’ve been staring at the same email for six minutes.”
“I’m thinking.”
“You’re emotionally malfunctioning.”
Accurate.
Mia studies me carefully before lowering her voice slightly.
“This about him?”
I hesitate.
Then against my better judgment, I nod once.
Her eyes widen instantly. “Oh no.”
“Yeah.”
“What happened?”
I stare down at my desk quietly before answering.
“He told me he loves me.”
Silence.
Then:
“Oh, you’re screwed.”
I let out a weak laugh despite myself. “That helpful insight really changed my life.”
“I’m serious.” Mia leans closer. “Men like that don’t casually say things like love unless they’re completely gone.”
That’s exactly what scares me.
Because Dominic isn’t careless emotionally.
Everything about him feels controlled.
Calculated.
So if he admitted love…
It means this has already become serious.
“You love him too,” Mia says softly.
Not a question.
I close my eyes briefly.
And that alone becomes answer enough.
“Oh, Alina.”
“I know.”
“No, I mean this is bad bad.”
“Again. Very helpful.”
Mia sighs before sitting back in her chair. “Okay. Honest question.”
“What?”
“If your mom wasn’t involved… would you be with him?”
The answer comes immediately.
Yes.
No hesitation.
No confusion.
And judging by Mia’s expression, my face answered before I did.
“There it is,” she says quietly.
I look away quickly.
Because saying it out loud somehow makes everything more real.
The problem isn’t just attraction anymore.
The problem is that Dominic feels right in a way I never expected.
And now every interaction with my mother feels like betrayal.
\---
By evening, I’m emotionally exhausted enough to consider disappearing into another country.
Instead, I end up standing outside Dominic’s building.
Terrible decision.
Absolutely terrible.
I don’t even remember consciously deciding to come here.
One second I was driving aimlessly.
The next, I’m staring up at the familiar tower feeling my heartbeat lose stability.
This is a mistake.
Still, I walk inside anyway.
The concierge already recognizes me now.
Which honestly feels concerning.
“Good evening, Miss Alina.”
I force a smile. “Hi.”
The elevator ride upstairs feels painfully long.
Because now that I’m here, reality starts settling in again.
I shouldn’t want this man.
Shouldn’t need him this much already.
And yet my body relaxed the second I decided to see him tonight.
The penthouse door opens almost immediately after I knock.
Like he was already waiting.
Dominic’s expression shifts the second he sees me standing there.
Surprise first.
Then something softer.
“Alina.”
Suddenly I feel nervous.
Which is ridiculous considering this man has literally seen me naked.
“You came,” he says quietly.
I fold my arms slightly. “I’m questioning that decision already.”
A faint smile appears briefly on his face.
Then he steps aside silently, letting me inside.
The penthouse feels calmer tonight.
Dim lighting.
Quiet music somewhere in the background.
Too intimate.
Dangerously intimate.
Dominic watches me carefully after the door closes.
“You’ve been thinking.”
“That obvious?”
“Yes.”
I exhale shakily before turning toward him fully.
“This is hurting her.”
The softness in his expression fades slightly.
Because he already knows who I mean.
Eleanor.
My mother.
“She loves you,” I whisper.
Dominic stays silent for a second too long.
Then finally he says quietly, “I care about her.”
The wording hits painfully hard.
Not love.
Care.
And somehow that makes everything worse.
“You were going to marry her.”
“I know.”
“Then how did this happen?”
Emotion flashes briefly across his face now.
Real emotion.
The kind he usually hides carefully.
“You.”
My pulse stumbles immediately.
Dominic steps closer slowly.
Not touching.
Just near enough that awareness instantly sparks again between us.
“You happened,” he says softly.
God.
I hate how much those words affect me.
“I’m trying to feel guilty enough to walk away,” I admit shakily.
His gaze holds mine steadily.
“And?”
I swallow hard.
Then tell him the truth.
“It’s not working anymore.”