Riley POV
I had to force myself to go back to the packhouse. I feel like a coward who ran out on her mate with no explanation. I spent hours running and then sitting in the woods, reflecting on everything that Damien had done to me. I remembered the collar and the pain he would put me through for every little thing. I remembered the humiliation, the degradation, and the abuse like I was experiencing it at his hands all over again. Why had I saved him? Why had my siren side shown such compassion to somebody who I felt didn't deserve to be saved? If I had known it was Damien, I would have left him in his feral wolf form and killed him. It was cold-blooded, and it was wrong, but I felt such rage towards him, it was all I could do to control my emotions, only to give way to loud and grief-filled howls as my emotions spilled over and became too much.
Endless tears had been shed. I refused to shed anymore. By the time I reached the grounds, I was composed, shifting back into my human form, feeling despondent. I could run, I could hide, but eventually, I would have to face the bastard who shared the same bloodline as me. It was inevitable. I couldn't keep running. There was Tiana to consider as well. I couldn't just leave her alone to lick my wounds. I dressed in some clothes I had the presence to hide on a different trip, my hands shaking. Was Bailey upset with me? Was he angry that I just turned and ran? I didn't know, and I didn't have the courage to mind-link him. In the end, it didn't matter. As I went towards the front door, it opened, and Bailey stepped out, an indecipherable expression on his face.
My mouth parted, but I could not find the words. Instead, silence escaped me and what little courage I possessed abandoned me. I could feel my body beginning to shake in spite of myself. My mate raked his gaze over me. I flinched, expecting to see derision, hatred, or even anger, but instead, all I saw was concern. My eyes swam with unshed tears.
"I…" I struggled to speak as he moved closer "I... I'm sorry", I stammered, and then felt his arms wrap around me, holding me close to him.
"Thank goodness you're okay" he breathed as I stiffened in shock "I was worried, but I knew you needed some time to yourself."
A tear trails down my cheek. "Is he?" I can't bring myself to utter his name.
Bailey steps back and cups my cheek, his eyes gazing over my body for injuries, his body relaxing when he finds nothing but minor scrapes and bruises on me. "Your brother" he chooses his words carefully as I fight not to flinch "has been placed in the dungeon for everybody's safety."
Safety. What a strange word. I felt a flood of relief wash over me. At least I wouldn't have to lay eyes on him, but part of me feels angry at myself. I wasn't the same person that I had been back when Damien lorded it over me. I wasn't the same Riley he was used to. I was meant to be stronger, and more courageous, and yet one look at my past and I had gone bolting. I feel shame wash over me. So much for being Luna material, I think blankly. A luna would not have run away from something as pathetic as I had just done.
"I know that it must have been upsetting seeing him again" Bailey's voice was filled with concern, his hand holding tightly to mine as he gazed down at me, "and I can't even begin to think how you're feeling right now."
"Did he fight?" part of me hopes Damien did so that I have a right to be angry with him, or at least an excuse to take my rage out on him.
Bailey reluctantly shakes his head. "He went to the dungeon willingly. There was no need to use an Alpha tone on him."
He pauses. I glanced at him sharply "What is it?"
Bailey's voice is low and apologetic "he asked about you."
Son of a bitch. I exhaled loudly. "Maybe I should go and see him then" my voice was tight.
Bailey lets out a low growl "just seeing him had you bolting into the forest" he says frustratedly, "and now you think going down to a dark smelly dungeon is a good idea?" he demands, holding tightly to both my arms as I stare at him. "You don't have anything to prove Riley. Not to me. Not to anyone else in this damn pack. You don't ever have to see him again if you don't want to" he continued passionately.
"I know," I told him faintly. "I know that I don't have to but" I hesitated and then decided to tell him exactly what I was thinking, "There must be a reason why my siren was so adamant about saving him. There was such grief in his song Bailey. Part of me had to have known who he was, and I saved him anyway", I said honestly, "that has to mean something."
"Does it?" he demanded slightly aggressively, "or are you wanting it to mean something because otherwise you saved somebody who didn't deserve it?"
I blanch. His face softens. "Riley, we don't know how your powers work. Maybe it just doesn't discriminate" he says, shrugging. "You're trying to make something out of nothing. Don't start thinking that your brother is suddenly this remorseful and changed man. I don't think it works that way."
He's blunt and to the point. He's trying to make me understand, not because he doesn't love me, but because he does and because he's concerned about me. He didn't want me to get hurt, thinking that Damien might have changed or become someone else. I had always wanted a brother, but that hope had faded long ago. I was no longer as naive as I was back then.
"I know that you're just trying to look out for me" I whispered, putting my hand on his chest as his eyes darkened slightly, "but I want to see him."
Silence. I see his lip twitching as he fights not to clench his jaw. He's struggling to hold his emotions in. I continue to wait. I could just go down to the dungeon myself, but I wanted Bailey to come with me. For comfort more than anything. I wanted him by my side, not to take over. He gave me a rueful smile. "You're determined to go down there, aren't you?"
I gave him an apologetic glance. "I'm afraid so" I agreed.
He kisses me lovingly on the lips and takes my hand. "Here," he says tightly, and we begin to walk inside, making our way toward the basement, where the dungeon is kept. As we head to the stairs leading down, I wrinkle my nose as I'm overwhelmed with the smell of old blood, piss, and dampness. The light is dim and provided by the smallest rectangular windows at the top of the cells. The dungeon is typical of any other dungeon that I've seen, and we reach the floor of the stairs, before heading towards the one cell that contains an occupant. For a moment, he didn't see us. His head is bowed, his hair longish and shaggy, his clothes swimming on him. It seemed that he'd been provided with secondhand clothes, I noted, no doubt another of Bailey's kindnesses. I could see bruises on his skin and wondered if the guards had been rough handling him or if it was another result of his transformation. He looked tired, I thought surprised and weary.
It must have been exhausting being in wolf form all the time, I thought, studying him carefully. I took a step and the sound of our footsteps finally broke through his concentration, because his head jerked upright instantly, and he glanced toward us. I saw fear in his eyes, along with something else I couldn't put my finger on. He stood upright, coming over to the bars. Even in the bad shape he was in, he was still recognizable as Damien, and yet, there was none of the hatred or disgust that he usually exhibited when he looked at me before. I glanced at Bailey, who had clenched his jaw. Silence as we stared at one another. I felt a pang as I took in how starved and malnourished Damien looked. I didn't want to feel sorry for him. I didn't want to feel anything for him at all. But the longer I looked at him, the more I began to feel some spark of compassion, something that made me angry. Why did he deserve compassion after everything he had done to me? Where was the compassion when it had come to torturing me? Where was the compassion when he had encouraged the pack members to abuse me? I wanted to scream out my anger, my body shaking as I looked deep into his eyes, only to see something I never would have thought he would be capable of showing. Shame.
"Riley," he said quietly, breaking the spell that everybody seemed to be under, "I was hoping you would come and see me."